Manka Bros. Would Like To Offer Ross Levinsohn A Job

Hello from the Seychelles!

I was interrupted during my morning para-scuba excursion with the news that Ross Levinsohn is leaving Yahoo!  

Is Yahoo! really that stupid?

Every month it’s a new high level executive on the market. Who needs headhunters when you have ex-Yahoo! CEOs out there?

[Note to Marissa Mayer:  Call me in a few months after you’ve officially handed the baby off to the nanny – I’ve got some great jobs at my company.]

Over the past few months, I have offered Jerry Yang, Carol Bartz and Scott Thompson excellent positions here at the studio (still waiting to hear back).

Today, Ross Levinsohn, it is your lucky day.

You have officially landed on your feet, my friend, because Manka Bros. would like to offer you a job.

A really good job, too – pretty much doing whatever you want as long as you don’t try to push any of that digital new media shit on me. That crap is nothing but a fad.

And while I’m at it, I would also like to offer your wife, Nicole, a job as well. She seems qualified and smart (two of the qualities many on the Senior Management Team definitely lack).

Per my offer to Scott Thompson, I would suggest something in the Theatrical or Television group – both are suck up a storm lately and I’ve been looking to replace Robin Rafe and Jay McBee for the past year (off the record).

The only jobs that are NOT available are mine and Lloyd Grohl. Everything else is in play.

Let me know by Thursday.  I’m doing a telepresence with the Seychellian press and I’d like to make an announcement.

By the way, it was great to see you at Herb Allen’s Sun Valley Conference.

I could tell you were a winner by the insane amount of vodka you could put away in a short period of time. And you’re right, Vodka of the Gods is just as good as Grey Goose.

Khan Manka, Jr. – Chairman & CEO – Manka Bros. Studios – The World’s Largest Media Company