Can Elin Woods Learn From Conan O'Brien?
As Tiger Woods slowly reemerges from hiding and Team-Tiger Damage Control goes full throttle, there is an interesting parallel to be made between the Tiger/Elin Woods drama and the NBC/Conan O'Brien drama (which cost all of us a few months out of our lives). Imagine Conan and Elin on one side and Tiger, Jay Leno, Jeff Zucker and NBC and on the other.
The parallel begins with a couple of a wide-eyed youths - dreaming of the big time.
- Conan: Becomes a comedy writer for such shows as "The Simpsons" and "Saturday Night Live", works his way up to get his own late night talk show on NBC but deep-down only imagines himself the host of one show... the crown jewel of the late night talk shows... "The Tonight Show".
- Elin: Is a nanny for a Swedish golf pro and hangs around a lot of single golfers on tour but really only imagines herself with one man... the crown jewel of golfers... Tiger Woods.
- Conan: Finally gets "The Tonight Show" in 2009 after slumming it for 16 years at 12:35am.
- Elin: Finally gets a marriage proposal in 2004 from Tiger Woods after slumming it as a nanny for Jesper Parnevik's kids.
- Conan: Jay Leno retires from "The Tonight Show" and prepares to launch an ill-conceived prime time talk show - "The Jay Leno Show". Conan, believing NBC's promise, happily takes over the reigns of "The Tonight Show" and looks forward to a long and prosperous run as host.
- Elin: Tiger Woods retires from his crazy single days and prepares for an ill-conceived life of domestic bliss. Elin, believing Tiger, happily sets up a life of wealth and prosperity (and has two children to complete the ideal picture).
------------------------------------------------------------------------ Conan: Jay Leno's ratings crash after one week on the air. Jeff Zucker at NBC begins to question the decision to move Jay to prime time especially considering Conan O'Brien's horrible ratings.
- Elin: Tiger Woods crashes a Cadillac Escalade into a tree after Elin Woods decides to move a few of his teeth from the front to the back of his mouth with a 7 iron.
- Conan: Begins to feel humiliated by rumors of Jay Leno returning to late night.
- Elin: Begins to feel humiliated by rumors of Tiger Woods having 11 mistresses (6 of them 'serious').
- Conan: Rather than take the suck ass deal offered, Conan decides to leave NBC with $45 million.
- Elin: Rather than take the suck ass deal offered, Elin decides to hold out for $800 million! Take that suckers.
As for the future? Here's my guess:
- Conan: Having finalized the divorce from NBC, agrees to a deal with TBS.
- Elin: After finalizing the divorce from Tiger, agrees to go on a disastrous first date with Rory Sabbatini (or some other less successful golfer that wishes he was Tiger Woods). She breaks her promise not to talk about Tiger's affairs and loses everything. The book doesn't sell and she moves in with John Daly.
Dear Elin:
Conan couldn't in good conscious stay at NBC (even though his dream life went up in flames) and you can't stay with Tiger (even though your dream life has gone up in flames). Take the money and run to that house in Sweden. You will have a better future.
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About Jill Kennedy
Jill Kennedy is an Ivy League MBA / refugee from Lehman Brothers.
Manka Bros. (and the Manka Business Channel) hired her (for a very low sum) to cover the world of media (not the world of Medea) in her own words without corporate interference.
About Medea
Medea was a real bitch from classical mythology - as most famously dramatized by Euripides.
She was a sorceress and wife of Jason, whom she assisted in obtaining the Golden Fleece. When Jason deserted her, she chopped up their children. One could say, Medea acted as rationally as a major media company.
Tips, Scoops and Smoking Guns
She's staying. She doesn't want to live on a barren island in Sweden. She wants to stay in the limelight and, yes, I believe she was a golddigger. If he was some plumber and did this she would be long gone.
he's going to do a bunch of cliches. One day at a time... working through it... I've let my family down, etc. But nothing will really be said except for the first tournament he'll play in. That's really the only way to get back to the public good graces - win golf tournaments.
Everything I've read (and there's a lot out there) is that she won't be with him tomorrow and won't be staying with him. Basically TW is going to say it's over.
He will only say something so carefully crafted and staged that it will do nothing but frustrate all those hoping to get some insight.
Stories such as this tends to make me very unhappy, I understand it's cleache to say if we could all simply get along, but how much more of this are people going to suffer?
Tiger Woods definitely does talk an excellent game in the media meeting regarding appearing more respectful to golf, however his decisions spoke much louder than his words while he skipped the Arnold Palmer Invitational. He might have generated so much good will by doing the tournament. Arnie would have handled anything which he might have for helping present Tiger in the best light, but instead Tiger chooses to dismiss one of the legends of the game to do his own personal thing. Best of luck at the Masters, Mister Woods. Congratulations towards Ernie Els, and also I really hope you will do well with Augusta.
I watched Conan on tour a few days ago and it was very entertaining. I can't wait for his new show to come to TBS. It will be the start of a new chapter in late night television.