Ginger & Rosa

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

What the hell?!?

I am sent to see the independently filmed “Ginger & Rosa.”

I have depression, for it is no “Olympus is Falling Over!” 

That would have been the shit.

But no.

“Ginger & Rosa.”

Then my disappointment was to disappear – like hangover pain after a good bong load.

I see on the screen something almost not possible.

But is.

There are two Fannings now. 

My mind is blow up. I already knew this, but this new one is now more formed.

There was once one Fanning – cute, with oozing talent, charm. Like young Drew Barrymore with less drugs.

Then she started with the dirty in “The Runaways.”

Pretty soon, 18 and naked – please (this is not a bad thing and my fingers are crossed).

So the Dakota parents make a clone.

This clone is not perfect – less a twin and more like a little sister.

She is very serious.  And in “8mm” the only actor who acted.

Now she is very, very serious. Red hair serious.

Plot? Not so much.

Atmosphere? Totally.

Early 1960s England is a very cold place with nuclear bomb fear stuck on everybody. There is nothing to do but have bomb fear (Angry Birds is still 100 years into the future and texting even further away).

So schoolgirl friends, the smart Ginger (Elle Fanning) and increasingly horny Rosa (Alice Englert), have no time for nothing but smoking crappy cigarettes and looking at the sea.

And hanging out, while looking at the sea.

Then, there is more sea looking.

Ginger’s father Roland (Alessandro Nivola) is of the art-type, and a pussy when war was a thing to do.

He is a pre-hippy.

With a boat.

There is a lot of hanging out and smoking (and sea looking).

There are gay guys who aren’t gay at all.

Annette Bening is for no reason. Cuba then has a crisis.

SPOILER ALERT! SERIOUSLY!

Finally, some plot. Or not. Ginger goes all anti-bomb death – Rosa goes all “I need me some daddy time” – Roland goes all “I need me some teenage [censored by editor]”.

Can friendship survive worst screen father in Cuban Crisis history?

Will Christina Hendricks (as Ginger’s big boobed Mom) ever show off her amazing chest puppies?

Will someone explain why Annette Bening is on the screen?

END SPOILERS!!!

I can’t help but to be in the liking of this movie.

None of my thumbs scream skyward, yet none of them are too droopy as well.

I partook of the sweet, sweet smoke. I drank Kossu before sitting at this typing computer.

Maybe see it for free. Time is not too wasted (unlike me, Kimmo, who is totally wasted).

Elle Fanning will some day be a star. Until she, too, has to be dirty and third Fanning (second clone) will be unleashed. The count down to 18 has begun…

Kimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “The Voice” is coming back, but no Xtina! I hope Shakira wears little clothes. And Blake Shelton accepts my invitation to drink until Kossu madness is achieved. And they have now an asshole (and Justin Bieber enabler) instead of the cool dwarf. I hope there is no hate in my heart and head for the new.