Lucy [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Lucy, Luc Besson, Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman, Min-sik Choi, Amr Waker, Julian Rhind-Tutt, Pilou Asbaek, Analeigh Tipton, Nicolas Phongpheth, Jan Oliver Schroeder, Luca Angeletti, Loic Brabant, Pierre Grammont, Pierre POirot, Bertrand Quoniam, Pascal Loison, Pierre Gerard, Isabelle Cagnat, Frederic Chau, Claire Tran, Francois Legrand, Bob Martet, Cedric Cevalme, Alexis Rangheard, Tonio Descanvelle, Christophe Lavalle, Julien Personnaz, Matthew Bravais, Renaud Cestre, Thibault Segouin, Claire Zaniolo, Alessandro Giallocosta, Wolfgang Pissors, Sifan Shao, Paul chan, I Cheng-Sheng, Chou Chung-Wei, Huan Jhih-Cyuan, Frank Ma, Tseng Sheng-En, Liu Hsieh-Min, Sandra Abouav, Abel Abouliten, Ken Lin, Feng Hsing, Hsu Hao-Hsiang, Laura D'Arista, Eunyul Hong, Samuel Churin, Mason Lee, Mohammad Aslam Ansari, Kevin Dust, Diego Llano, Timothy Reevis, Jeysson Reyes De La Cruz, German Tintaya Mamani, Kannetl Sawe Han, Yvonne Gradelet, Christophe Tek, Marc Shmuger, Virginie Silla, Eric Serra, Thierry Arbogast, Nathalie Cheron, Hugues Tissandier, Gilles Boillot, Pierre Accolas, Adrien Adriaco, Corine Artru, Ronnie Avenel, Sarah Bonnet, Karelle Ciana, Jeremy Fernandez, March Guidetti, Erwan Hiernard, Philipp Klausing, Mickaila Mourier, Sandrine Parnet, Jason Pomerantz, Alix Sidem, Sebastien Toujan, William Trillaud, Ludovic Bernard, Hsun-Wei David Change, Thomas Colban, Krespine David, Kevin Frilet, Marie Rolindes, Carole Schmidlin, Mathieu Turi, Jason Abell, Jeremy Babinet, Jerome Brechet, Mickael Commereuc, Marjolaine Mispelaere, Alexandre Mahout, Adrien Adriaco, Antonina Pashchenko, Benjamin Assayag, Julie Birenbaum, Laurent Blu, Pierre de Bourgies, Carl Cutting, Isabelle d'Olce, Frederic Dagmey, Marc Guidetti, Romain Hervieux, Hazel Intal, Gregoire Jeudy, Marie Leconte, Damien Noguer, Lisbeth Olofsson, Mathilde Waignier, Amanda Whitcroft

Lucy

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Things that I, Kimmo, only use 10% of:

1) Muscles. Hard to be massive Super-Finn when keyboard is stuck to finger ends and I must drink Kossu and smoke for you people for the movies to know of watching or not. Hard work, but not of the muscle kind. Damn.

2) Jar of Pickled Herring. Damn stuff. Now that I am a burger eater (U.S.A.!  U.S.A.!) that jar of heaven has turned in to jar of vinegar fish. Into the garbage, fish. My brain is hanging upside down.

3) Emotions. Until new love of my life – Tatiana Maslany – is made to me availability, I can only feel sulking and sad. 5% of each : ( Which is 10% in adding).

Now for some dumb: we all use all of our brains all of the time.

10% usage bullshit is 100% bullshit.

Yet 90% are little fool brains that go “OK! 10% it is! Preach on, Brother Luc!”

So, he does.

And so, we have “Lucy”.

Best part of “Lucy” (not including Scarlett Johansson’s parts)? You will only need 6% of your brain for the “Lucy” liking.

Maybe 5.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Lucy, Luc Besson, Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman, Min-sik Choi, Amr Waker, Julian Rhind-Tutt, Pilou Asbaek, Analeigh Tipton, Nicolas Phongpheth, Jan Oliver Schroeder, Luca Angeletti, Loic Brabant, Pierre Grammont, Pierre POirot, Bertrand Quoniam, Pascal Loison, Pierre Gerard, Isabelle Cagnat, Frederic Chau, Claire Tran, Francois Legrand, Bob Martet, Cedric Cevalme, Alexis Rangheard, Tonio Descanvelle, Christophe Lavalle, Julien Personnaz, Matthew Bravais, Renaud Cestre, Thibault Segouin, Claire Zaniolo, Alessandro Giallocosta, Wolfgang Pissors, Sifan Shao, Paul chan, I Cheng-Sheng, Chou Chung-Wei, Huan Jhih-Cyuan, Frank Ma, Tseng Sheng-En, Liu Hsieh-Min, Sandra Abouav, Abel Abouliten, Ken Lin, Feng Hsing, Hsu Hao-Hsiang, Laura D'Arista, Eunyul Hong, Samuel Churin, Mason Lee, Mohammad Aslam Ansari, Kevin Dust, Diego Llano, Timothy Reevis, Jeysson Reyes De La Cruz, German Tintaya Mamani, Kannetl Sawe Han, Yvonne Gradelet, Christophe Tek, Marc Shmuger, Virginie Silla, Eric Serra, Thierry Arbogast, Nathalie Cheron, Hugues Tissandier, Gilles Boillot, Pierre Accolas, Adrien Adriaco, Corine Artru, Ronnie Avenel, Sarah Bonnet, Karelle Ciana, Jeremy Fernandez, March Guidetti, Erwan Hiernard, Philipp Klausing, Mickaila Mourier, Sandrine Parnet, Jason Pomerantz, Alix Sidem, Sebastien Toujan, William Trillaud, Ludovic Bernard, Hsun-Wei David Change, Thomas Colban, Krespine David, Kevin Frilet, Marie Rolindes, Carole Schmidlin, Mathieu Turi, Jason Abell, Jeremy Babinet, Jerome Brechet, Mickael Commereuc, Marjolaine Mispelaere, Alexandre Mahout, Adrien Adriaco, Antonina Pashchenko, Benjamin Assayag, Julie Birenbaum, Laurent Blu, Pierre de Bourgies, Carl Cutting, Isabelle d'Olce, Frederic Dagmey, Marc Guidetti, Romain Hervieux, Hazel Intal, Gregoire Jeudy, Marie Leconte, Damien Noguer, Lisbeth Olofsson, Mathilde Waignier, Amanda WhitcroftPlot? Does late night acid trip have plotting?

Then, yes – let’s go to Plot City!

In Taiwan, poor Lucy (Scarlett Johansson) is much too hot for crap friend (Pilou Asbaek) so he handcuffs her to a briefcase (take that, “50 Shades of Grey”).

Then there is death by shooting, and in comes Oldboy (Choi Min-sik). He puts blue drugs (Heisenberg shout out!) into her stomach and says, in his mind thoughts, “you are my hot mule now, bitch!”

He is right.

She is one hot mule.

Bitch.

Lucy reacts like a literal kick to the stomach, which happens.

Boom!

Drugs loose in the streaming blood of her body blood river, Lucy now gets a brain, bigger and faster than Caesar in the first Apes movie.

Now there is a race and who will win – Mr. Death, or Lucy’s brain – getting bigger, awesome-er, and crazier by the second?

Best times are when her cells start to get brainy.

All of them.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Lucy, Luc Besson, Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman, Min-sik Choi, Amr Waker, Julian Rhind-Tutt, Pilou Asbaek, Analeigh Tipton, Nicolas Phongpheth, Jan Oliver Schroeder, Luca Angeletti, Loic Brabant, Pierre Grammont, Pierre POirot, Bertrand Quoniam, Pascal Loison, Pierre Gerard, Isabelle Cagnat, Frederic Chau, Claire Tran, Francois Legrand, Bob Martet, Cedric Cevalme, Alexis Rangheard, Tonio Descanvelle, Christophe Lavalle, Julien Personnaz, Matthew Bravais, Renaud Cestre, Thibault Segouin, Claire Zaniolo, Alessandro Giallocosta, Wolfgang Pissors, Sifan Shao, Paul chan, I Cheng-Sheng, Chou Chung-Wei, Huan Jhih-Cyuan, Frank Ma, Tseng Sheng-En, Liu Hsieh-Min, Sandra Abouav, Abel Abouliten, Ken Lin, Feng Hsing, Hsu Hao-Hsiang, Laura D'Arista, Eunyul Hong, Samuel Churin, Mason Lee, Mohammad Aslam Ansari, Kevin Dust, Diego Llano, Timothy Reevis, Jeysson Reyes De La Cruz, German Tintaya Mamani, Kannetl Sawe Han, Yvonne Gradelet, Christophe Tek, Marc Shmuger, Virginie Silla, Eric Serra, Thierry Arbogast, Nathalie Cheron, Hugues Tissandier, Gilles Boillot, Pierre Accolas, Adrien Adriaco, Corine Artru, Ronnie Avenel, Sarah Bonnet, Karelle Ciana, Jeremy Fernandez, March Guidetti, Erwan Hiernard, Philipp Klausing, Mickaila Mourier, Sandrine Parnet, Jason Pomerantz, Alix Sidem, Sebastien Toujan, William Trillaud, Ludovic Bernard, Hsun-Wei David Change, Thomas Colban, Krespine David, Kevin Frilet, Marie Rolindes, Carole Schmidlin, Mathieu Turi, Jason Abell, Jeremy Babinet, Jerome Brechet, Mickael Commereuc, Marjolaine Mispelaere, Alexandre Mahout, Adrien Adriaco, Antonina Pashchenko, Benjamin Assayag, Julie Birenbaum, Laurent Blu, Pierre de Bourgies, Carl Cutting, Isabelle d'Olce, Frederic Dagmey, Marc Guidetti, Romain Hervieux, Hazel Intal, Gregoire Jeudy, Marie Leconte, Damien Noguer, Lisbeth Olofsson, Mathilde Waignier, Amanda WhitcroftThey are like, “we’re cells, and we’re outta here, man.” They are for splitting, but Lucy’s big brain says “eff that, cells. Stick around and things will get AWESOME!”

So they do.

Too give away any is to give away all, except: She is on a questing, to Paris (why not?), to find super smart guy Professor Norman (Morgan Freeman).

Lucy want to know 1) Why is my mind moving crap? 2) Why are my cells talking and wanting to leave me? 3) Where did these tentacles come from?

Norman has some answers, but not for tentacles (my fingers wanted to type “testicles”! Crazy dirty fingers!)

So, two thumbs up for reasons I am now giving (even two tentacles, if I had them… heh testicles).

With the sweet, sweet smoke and four shots of Kossu, the movie was a happy fun time in my cranium.

Special effects? Check.

Cool violence? Check.

Scarlett Johansson walking in slow motion (boing, boing, boing)? Double check.

And the movie was one hour and twenty nine minutes long. Take that Hollywood. It can be done. Now do it more often.

See “Lucy.” Her mega-brain demands it.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S. “The Strain” is some icky shit. But I am all in on loving it. No sparkly vampires, but vampire worms! Robert Pattinson, finally a vampire you would be good at! I kid, Robert.   You would suck (as in “bad”, not vacuum blood into mouth hole), even as worm. This is the truth.

SEE KIMMO’S REVIEW RIGHT HERE:

2 Replies to “Lucy [REVIEW]”

  1. Kimmo, Darling… Expendables 3? Do not see it. It’s an affront on so many levels, the harm to your gentle sensibilities might never be undone.

  2. Lucy is full of action and emotion movie. I have watched that movie 4 times and every time i enjoyed that movie . I always feel i’m watching that movie first time. That movie is one of my favorite movies. The action of Lucy is out of the park.

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