Michael Dean – Behind the Proscenium

Men In Black 3

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Men In Black.

They took my great-grandparents’ out to a field.

Then in the head brain shot.

Dead.

Not funny.

Fucking Nazis.

Then movie times.

“Men In Black” sprays on Finland.

Funny?

Hells to the yeah!

Aliens!

Crashes!

Fresh Prince!

“Men In Black 2”? Nice. Not necessary.

Saw it three times while feeling up the boob of Anita Krakhousenen (her boobs were for to make the manhood mine – and then some! Until this day I will remember… more than a handful).

To say that “Men in Black 3″ is the best installment in the trilogy, there is only that we are moving briskly.

Plot? Maybe.

It all starts in a maximum security prison located on the Moon.

Boris Boglodite, fearsome creature played by Jermaine Clement, managed to escape and return to Earth with the goal of death of Constable K (Tommy Lee Jones), which put him in the nuts (THE NUTS!) in the late 60s, and the enslavement of our planet.

To achieve his goals, he uses a machine to explore time and changes the course of history.

Faced with the catastrophic consequences of acts of Boris, Agent J (Will Smith) has only one solution – to turn the plunge and find themselves pushed in 1969 to try to put things in order.

If Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have with an infection joy their respective archetypes (the cool talkative and taciturn cranky), a third actor they blithely steals the show through an irresistible performance.

This is Josh Brolin, who was the George Bush and Oliver Stone plays here an Agent K the younger. Via a hilarious imitation of Tommy Lee Jones, a game of mimicry and an amazing little help cosmetic, the illusion is perfect.

So, in your face!

Now my stoner brain is in crisis.

Josh Brolin in this movie? Or greatest actor Tommy Lee Jones making me think that Josh Brolin is the Tommy Lee Jones?

Son of a bitch.

This movie is hard.

Who is who?

What the hell?

The good rises so high that right here there is only a high five given. To myself.

You are left to hang.

Favorite for me is the alien freak show. From their time of the 60s (and some 70s) we find a passion for laughing at the past.

Now is so cool. The past is for crap.

We have neck beards now and are the hip!

Everything before 2005 is a joke for on the farting!

I’m so fucking cool. I’m wearing a fedora!

Sorry. The Lemon Stank Weed throws me on a tangent.

“Men In Black 3” was cool.

Why do I let Hollywood rile me so?

I still wait for “Prometheus.”

Kimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S. HAAAAA!!!! American Idol!!!! I called it 10 weeks ago!!!!! WGWG#5!!!!!! Vidar, you can suck it!!!!! Phillip Phillips is the motherfucking man!!! If Dave Mathews dies…

Wanderlust

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Sad writing times still sad.

To you, one less ferret.

To me, one less heart string by rodent warmed (Ed. Note – see last week. Sad.).

Movies? Films? Cinema?

Do now I even care?

Well. Yes.

I am a professional.

Roger Ebert never had the losing of constructive three weeks ruined. He is just jawless. Which is BADASS!!!

I am high.

“Wanderlust.”

WTF?

Good for the hoping?!? “Hells yes!”, in my mind I thought.

Why not? David Wain? Pretty funny for sure.

Some Appatow producing? Why THE HELL not?!?

The world needs more penis jokes.

Full disclosure: I am almost the gay for Paul Rudd as for the “Puss In Boots.” Malin Akerman makes my man parts yearn to the moon (and beyond). Ken Marino? Funny, bitches!

Movie? Film? Cinema?

Meh.

Plot? Not really, but try I must (Do, Kimmo, do! I hear you, Yoda!).

Linda (Jennifer Aniston) and George (Paul Rudd) have losing of work and only hitting hard the road can anything worthy of thought matter.

Then (being caught of the disease “movie dumb”), into Georgia they wander really.

Not good Georgia (former Soviets, science, industry) – but retard Georgia (peanuts, Creationism, crackers). Yet by not making Georgia they find communal living.

And Malin Akerman. More to come.

Jokes? Yes! And bad. Pubic hair.

Saying “dick” (funny when high, so funny at this time to me). Stereotypes that were original in the period of Never.

Oh! And closing credit out-takes!

Odin, this is the bestest! Never done in my life before my eye holes!

This movie is defeating me. Ennui hurts more than any other tired.

Now we leave the review for momentarily…

Why in February?

Is Universal much about the write off loss (so many questions – damn Kossu shots!). I have never tasted the accounting and still for the numbers I strain.

Are the Universal hoping for cinema death, to write off against anything that bathes in money?

Oh, to bath in money.

The entire movie taste is placed on the liking of the leads.

In your mind Rudd sucks? Then this sucks.

In your mind Aniston sucks? Same.

In your mind Akerman sucks? I will kill you. In your goddamn face. And don’t even touch her. Your death would be epic (for me) and of agony (for you). With fucking fire. Bitch.

So… really. See this crap if you are for the $15 to pump back into Uncle Sam. One thumb sideways. Malin Akerman is a goddess.

Else? Whatever. Do what you have to do. I cannot stop you.

Kimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S. As “Fringe” comes to an end I want to J.J. Abrams say “nice job”. We will never again mention “Lost”. You asshole.

P.P.S. Fluffy. I said it. Crying begins once more. Damn.

Tag: Michael Dean

Men In Black 3 [REVIEW]

Wanderlust [REVIEW]