Pierce Austin – Behind the Proscenium

Men In Black 3

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Men In Black.

They took my great-grandparents’ out to a field.

Then in the head brain shot.

Dead.

Not funny.

Fucking Nazis.

Then movie times.

“Men In Black” sprays on Finland.

Funny?

Hells to the yeah!

Aliens!

Crashes!

Fresh Prince!

“Men In Black 2”? Nice. Not necessary.

Saw it three times while feeling up the boob of Anita Krakhousenen (her boobs were for to make the manhood mine – and then some! Until this day I will remember… more than a handful).

To say that “Men in Black 3″ is the best installment in the trilogy, there is only that we are moving briskly.

Plot? Maybe.

It all starts in a maximum security prison located on the Moon.

Boris Boglodite, fearsome creature played by Jermaine Clement, managed to escape and return to Earth with the goal of death of Constable K (Tommy Lee Jones), which put him in the nuts (THE NUTS!) in the late 60s, and the enslavement of our planet.

To achieve his goals, he uses a machine to explore time and changes the course of history.

Faced with the catastrophic consequences of acts of Boris, Agent J (Will Smith) has only one solution – to turn the plunge and find themselves pushed in 1969 to try to put things in order.

If Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have with an infection joy their respective archetypes (the cool talkative and taciturn cranky), a third actor they blithely steals the show through an irresistible performance.

This is Josh Brolin, who was the George Bush and Oliver Stone plays here an Agent K the younger. Via a hilarious imitation of Tommy Lee Jones, a game of mimicry and an amazing little help cosmetic, the illusion is perfect.

So, in your face!

Now my stoner brain is in crisis.

Josh Brolin in this movie? Or greatest actor Tommy Lee Jones making me think that Josh Brolin is the Tommy Lee Jones?

Son of a bitch.

This movie is hard.

Who is who?

What the hell?

The good rises so high that right here there is only a high five given. To myself.

You are left to hang.

Favorite for me is the alien freak show. From their time of the 60s (and some 70s) we find a passion for laughing at the past.

Now is so cool. The past is for crap.

We have neck beards now and are the hip!

Everything before 2005 is a joke for on the farting!

I’m so fucking cool. I’m wearing a fedora!

Sorry. The Lemon Stank Weed throws me on a tangent.

“Men In Black 3” was cool.

Why do I let Hollywood rile me so?

I still wait for “Prometheus.”

Kimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S. HAAAAA!!!! American Idol!!!! I called it 10 weeks ago!!!!! WGWG#5!!!!!! Vidar, you can suck it!!!!! Phillip Phillips is the motherfucking man!!! If Dave Mathews dies…

Cowboys & Aliens

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Cowboys & Aliens. Who didn’t play this game in the backyard, when you were children?

I was always a cowboy for I had a hat. It (the scenario) was better on my neighbor Kurri’s backyard; than it was on the big-ass screen.

Story? Well, here goes something…

If a stranger wakes up in the middle in New Mexico in 1873, he does not have memory of his past.

So says this film.

The only reference point which he has is, clamped to his wrist, an outlandish metal bracelet.

The foreigner walks into the city of Absolution and confuses and angers of the local cattle baron – his son. And he has run afoul and a brigand (yes, at the same time).

But when he finds out why he can’t think (not booze – though that has made me not think – like last Wednesday… but that is for another article – boy, I was drunk) – I just got lost in my own sentence.

And from here, Cowboys & Aliens enters into same old, same old cycle, which has the again formed group to run into sporadic detours on their journey – only to be alien attacked again and again.

I miss Indians.

The attacks are shot acceptable. Director Jon Favreau is not stranger to the shooting activity, but there’s no tension, no edge of their seat excitement, which should come at all directions and from each possible position of constraint.

And then we find the heroes can die.

No one never did die in the Kurri’s backyard (not for lack of trying).

Cowboys & Aliens is played fast and loose. The film wastes no time with receiving firmly into and soon it is alien time.

This sets the movie away from other, shy, films. Like Super 8. Show the monster already!

Daniel Craig forms persuasive ass-kicker, for very much a cowboy. That is, if you’ve never seen a movie about cowboys – with or without aliens.

I won’t spoil the alien look. They’re gnarly and ugly – like Kathy Griffin (ha! A joke!).

But even awkward exhibition and lengthy letters can work on their way into an exciting adventure film. Unfortunately, no person it seems in Cowboys & Aliens seems to have fun.

Harrison Ford grumbles with constipation, which does in each film for the last several years (two words – stool softener. Changed my life).

There are moments here and, where he and Craig talk to each other with their eyeballs. Those moments are cool.

Sam Rockwell seems the only member which thoroughly amuses himself. At my screening, the chant “More Sam, more Sam” made the rafters dance (disco!).

And this disappointment continues and on into approximately each aspect of Cowboys & Aliens (that is fun to type).

A western film, tries to have John Ford landscapes, can not strike the necessary boundry-lessness of the west – and the alien motivation for the Earth grabbing? Stupid, stupid, stupid (my editor stops me at three stupids).

Summary: Cowboy & Aliens was better in the Kurri’s backyard of my childhood than in the multiplex which now probably fills the backyard of your youth.

Oh, and Olivia Wilde is fetching (new word)!

Kimmo Mustonenen (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

Tag: Pierce Austin

Men In Black 3 [REVIEW]

Cowboys & Aliens [REVIEW]