jean-Luc Vaillant

January 6, 2014January 22, 2014

Only Tech Reporters Care About CES

Ari Emanuel, Ben Silverman, Bob's Big Boy Burbank, Electus, Fred Willard, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, Jill Kennedy, kara swisher, Khan Manka, Les Moonves, Manka Bros., Melinda the first lady of magic, nikki finke, Nokia Theater, OnMedea, Philippe Dauman, Rupert Murdoch, sharon waxman, Sherry Lansing, Sumner Redstone, Taylor Swift, Terry Semel, The black Eyed Peas, thewrap.com, Viacom's Holiday party, Accel Partners, Alan Eustace, Allen Blue, Ann Mather, Arvind Rajan, Ben Silverman, Bob Iger, Bret Taylor, Chamath Palihapitiya, Chris Hughes, Christopher Cox, Dan Rose, David Drummond, David Ebersman, David Fischer, David Henke, David Kirkpatrick, David Sze, Deep Nishar, Dustin Moskovitz, Eduardo Saverin, Ellen Levy, Elliot Schrage, Emilie Choi, Eric Schmidt, Erika Rottenberg, Gerald Levin, Greylock Partners, HBO, Jean-Luc Vaillant, Jeff Bewkes, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, Jill Kennedy, Jim Breyer, Joanna Shields, John Doerr, John Hennessy, Jon Miller, Jonathan Heiliger, Jonathan Rosenberg, Justin Aselage, Katrina Hau, Kevin Eyres, Khan Manka, Li Ka-shing, Lori Goler, Manka Bros., Marc Andreessen, Mark Cuban, Mark Zuckerberg, Matt Cohler, Mike Gamson, Mike Murphy, Mike Schroepfer, MySpace, Nicolas Carlson, Nikesh Arora, OnMedea, Owen Van Natta, Patrick Crane, Patrick Pichette, Paul Buchheit, Paul Madera, Paul Otellini, Peter Thiel, Ram Shriram, Reid Hoffman, Robby Kwok, Rupert Murdoch, Sergey Brin, Sheryl Sandberg, Shirley Tilghman, Shona Brown, Steve Cadigan, Steve Patrizi, Steve Sordello, Sumner Redstone, Ted Ullyot, Tony DiSanto, Toy Story 3, CES

Nearly every major online publication (and print for that matter) are sending at least one reporter to Las Vegas for the Consumer Electronic Show (CES) – and no one, except those reporters, actually cares what comes out of the show.

It’s all the same – year after year.

Reporters write up an elaborate post about “What to expect from CES this year!” –

– then they go to Vegas

– they do a decent write up of Day 1

– then they party hard the first night because they have been so focused on the build up of CES that they just want to unwind

– and then they write a lackluster Day 2 report (because they are hungover)

– party some more

– and then sort of disappear until it’s time to drag themselves home.

Believe me, if CES were held in Fresno, even the Tech reporters wouldn’t show up.

Because it’s not about “new technology” (the gadgets are really just variations on themes from the past 10 years), it’s about “Vegas” and being able to get drunk on the company dime.

The same goes for the legions of companies that attempt to break new products and show off their brilliant innovations.

It’s a snow job – everyone is reprinting the same press release and then heading to dinners and cocktail parties to talk about the press release.

99.99% of the world’s population really don’t care to read about a $150,000 4K television, or a self-driving car or wearable tech – they might buy it once it hits the market if the products are good – but to read about it from hundreds of tech reporters and bloggers? Not so much.

But 99.99% do care about Vegas. So just write about your debauchery (like this CEO from last year – CES After Dark) and forget the gadgets.

No one cares.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

November 22, 2013May 12, 2014

The Great Media Bloodbath of 2014

5/12/14 UPDATE: AT&T to acquire DirecTV! Lock the doors – it’s scary out there.

2/12/14 UPDATE: Holy Crap, 2014 just got a whole lot uglier (and it was already hideous) with the announcement of Comcast acquiring Time Warner Cable!

ORIGINAL POST:

It’s coming.

Holy shit is it coming.

Millions are getting pummeled with a horrible winter but brace yourselves further, because you are in for a shitstorm of job cuts in 2014.

It will not be pretty.

It seems that media company CEOs are hell bent on proving to Wall Street that their companies can be growth companies.

Unless they fire every employee and start a new company by themselves in a garage, they cannot be growth companies the way Wall Street would like.

20% margins just will never happen again in the movie, TV, print, or music industries – so deal with it.

But these CEOs are guys (all guys) who think they can do anything.

But they will fail.

And then they’ll CUT.

And… it will not be pretty.

Tribune got things started.

Sony will be next.

My company’s CEO has called 2014 “The Year of the Hammer.”

No one will make it through unscathed.

First to go will be the packaged media folks. Those who support the production and distribution of DVDs and CDs and magazines, etc.

Gone.

Next will be the slow growth businesses – like movies and Broadcast TV production (serious like a heart attack).

Slates will be slashed, storytelling risk-taking will cease to exist.

Since no one can seem to do comedy anymore on Broadcast, they will be relegated to the epic mini-series format like “Under The Dome” and live Sports to stay afloat.

Then, finally, the low margin businesses will be hit – like console games. With the exception of a few huge titles, it’s a tough business and it certainly doesn’t help these overly-ambitious / delusional CEOs hit their targets.

So what’s going to be left? TV production for cable and Over-The-Top (OTT).

Why TV gets ownership of Internet content production is baffling to me. But they do.

By the end of 2014, giant media companies with their film studios, broadcast networks and massive real estate leases will be much MUCH leaner and the quality of the product will be much MUCH worse.

Hey, but a point of margin here and a point of margin there adds up to… 2 points.

But lighten up, Spring is coming.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

October 9, 2013October 10, 2013

CBS Cancels ‘We Are Men’

Really sad.

The people who created this show really thought they had another “Friends.”

Oh, well.

Next time – be more funny – and stop trying to write for the idiots who you believe are not as smart as you.

Chin up, maybe Basic Cable or Netflix is ready for your groundbreaking style.

Gone are the dreams and dancing.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

P.S. – If you’re wondering what’s up with this bullshit post – read this.

October 9, 2013

Journalism Is Dead

If other blogs didn’t steal my stuff years ago, I would have said R.I.P. Journalism – but “R.I.P.” as a way of saying a something is dead is also dead.

So, what do I mean by “Journalism Is Dead?”

Very simple. Journalism is dead. I’ll prove it.

The online media “information” space has been taken over by the Press Release. Companies issue press releases or send emails to blogs like Deadline.com or TechCrunch and that becomes the news of the day. No one is actually out in the field unless you consider a guy with a camera in the face of a drunken celebrity at TMZ real journalism.

Very few – VERY FEW – are actually digging up stories, creating news – trying to right the wrongs. It’s all controlled by someone other than journalists.

So here’s my experiment…

I didn’t really write over the summer because I was working on a book – so my numbers were pretty terrible on this blog. I was doing pretty well when I was constantly writing about how Facebook sucks. But now it’s terrible.

Last month I had very few eyeballs on this site because I really wasn’t around and only posted one time. Pretty sad.

In September 2013 – OnMedea had 1,167 hits. A real low for the site – but my own fault. In October, I am at 574 hits for the month – mostly because of the old Sean Hannity story – but really terrible.

Now I’m mostly going to do what others “media” blogs do for the rest of the month (Press Releases, hearsay, etc. – with my own little comments here and there) – whatever takes the LEAST amount of time – and give updates on how my numbers change.

Should be an interesting experiment.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

September 9, 2013January 17, 2014

Lloyd Blankfein Is A Douche

It’s my shortest blog of the year – but I think the point is solid.

Here’s just one of the many reasons from NYMAG.com

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

August 5, 2011August 5, 2011

Wall Street Reminder: Nobody Knows Anything

OK – so the U.S. got downgraded by S&P (AA+) for the first time in its history. Whatever. It’s all just a game anyway.

Most talking heads throughout the weekend will say Monday will be a bloodbath on Wall Street and that many investors will be clamoring to yank out their cash.

But I must remind anyone who has money in the market (me!), out of the market and all those on the fence that “nobody knows anything.”

This phrase, coined by William Goldman in “Adventures In The Screen Trade” (worth a read even for non-screenwriters), is absolutely true in almost all industries and in almost all cases where someone is trying to predict the future.

In the movie business, the phrase was basically referring to the major studios’ inability to know what movies would work at the box office and what movies would fail. As it turns out, with all the historical data at our fingertips… nobody knows anything.

And the same goes for Wall Street:

Meredith Whitney, hotsy-totsy Queen of the Double-Dip, has no clue where the markets are going (though she seems to be praying for a downturn – probably more out of concern for her reputation than for the country).

That whack job Ray Dalio – founder of Bridgewater Associates (subject of a brilliant piece by John Cassidy in the New Yorker) – has no clue where the markets are going (though, to be fair, the whack job has been more successful than most in guessing lately).

The government, your parents, your children, Warren Buffett, CNBC, Fox News, Bloomberg, TechCrunch, your friends on social networks – nobody knows anything.

If they did, then Wednesday night I would have received a text or seen a tweet or a Facebook status update that said “The Dow will fall 512 points tomorrow – you may want to make a couple of portfolio moves.”

I didn’t get that message from any of those people who “know so much”. Just like I won’t get any correct message this weekend about what will happen on Monday. Because nobody knows anything about what will happen on Monday!

So this weekend, as we all think about our personal finances, don’t make knee-jerk decisions based on something someone says on television or an internet blog.

This may sound overly simplistic, but just go with your gut and calm the freak down. There are a lot great healthy American companies out there and they deserve your confidence.

But, then again, I don’t know anything either – and I certainly don’t know how “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” is going to perform this weekend – perhaps $35 million, perhaps $65 million. It’s a crap shoot.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

August 3, 2011December 2, 2011

OnMedea Raises $50 At A $1 Billion Valuation

I did it!

So, my mom sent me a check for $50 because she wanted to buy a piece of my growing media empire. (The growing part is a yet-to-launch blog on the insane nightlife of La Canada, CA called “La Canada Nights”.)

I told my mom her share of the company would be based on a $1 billion valuation (as it seems that’s the only valuation there is for a company these days).

For that $50 she will own 0.00000005% of the company. As part of my deal with Manka Bros., I own 50% of OnMedea (valued at $500 million), Manka Bros. owns another 20%($200 million) and Khan Manka, Jr. owns the remaining 30% ($300 million). My mom’s share will come out of my piece.

While some would say this is an outrageously high valuation and a sign that we are truly in a bubble – it’s really no more ridiculous than Airbnb, LinkedIn, Zynga, Groupon, Facebook or (fill in Y Combinator’s next spin-off here).

You could argue – hey, your annual revenues are in the low four figures, Zynga makes hundreds of millions (mid nine figures).

Point taken.

But here’s my point: A pumped up valuation is exactly that.

The key question for the entire financial ecosystem of Silicon Valley is, why do you do it? Answer: Because you can’t stop yourselves.

A fair valuation is not even on your radar because greed and jealousy take over. ‘That guy over there is 21 and got $200 million, I’m 25 and I’m only getting $100 million? F that!’

Why is everyone so desperate to reach THE BIG $B? Is just because of that one line of dialogue in “The Social Network”? Goddamn that is shallow… oh, yeah, right… I forgot who I am writing about.

Seriously, what’s wrong with a $350 million FAIR valuation and then show the world that you can grow and be worth more? Or a $50 million FAIR valuation? This obsession with “BILLION” is going to bring the entire system crashing down in the next year or so.

Bullshit is bullshit is bullshit…

But I digress… today, yippee-ki-yay, OnMedea is worth $1 billion dollars!

Suck on it.

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea

May 19, 2011May 20, 2011

LinkedIn Acquired By Monster.com For $37,242

Jeff Weiner, Nick Besbeas, Steve Cadigan, Mike Gamson, David Henke, Robby Kwok, Deep Nishar, Erika Rottenberg, Steve Sordello, Reid Hoffman, Allen Blue, Konstantin Guericke, Eric Ly, jean-Luc Vaillant, A George "Skip" Battle, Leslie Kilgore, Stanley Meresman, Michael J. Moritz, David Sze, Sal Iannuzzi, Timothy T. Yates, John Gaulding, Admiral Edmund P. Giambastiani, Cynthia P. McCague, Jeffrey F. Rayport, Roberto Tunioli, James M. Langrock, Andrea Bertone, Darko Dejanovic, Ted Gilvar, Edward Lo, Michael C. Miller, Lise Poulos, Mark Stoever, Patrick W. Manzo, OnMedea, Jill Kennedy, Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Ben Silverman, Sumner Redstone, Jeff Zucker, Ari Emanuel, Rupert Murdoch, Bob Iger

The year is 2014.

The people of the world have abandoned social networking after going out on too many creepy dates.

LinkedIn, once a Wall Street darling, was acquired today by Monster.com for $37,242 – basically the value of the copper wire in the walls of their unfinished (and unpaid for) $1 billion dollar office complex in The Presidio.

At its peak in late 2011, LinkedIn (a groundbreaking social network in which people could send messages to each other) had a market cap of $560 billion – more than the top 2 companies in the world combined.

The stock began its plunge after CEO Jeff Weiner cashed out and left the company to become CEO of Apple at the beginning of 2012. Ironically, Apple’s stock began its plunge immediately after he became CEO.

It’s really a tragic story of greed and the inability to create a product that people can actually use. And if they did use it, it was only because they thought they should be doing it – because others were – and no one wants to be left out. But now everyone is left out.

About the sale, Mr. Weiner said: “I work at Apple now. I’m just thinking about running this company. LinkedIn was just a blip in my long career. It was really Reid’s baby, Reid’s vision (State Senator Reid Hoffman D-Palo Alto). I just worked there.”

And made over $2 billion while there.

Senator Hoffman was unreachable by phone but did release a statement through his office: “LinkedIn should have been my ticket to wealth beyond my wildest dreams. Thinking back, I wish I would have sold all (or even some) of my stock when it peaked like Jeff Weiner did. That bastard made $2 billion! It’s a God damned shame. State politics don’t pay shit.”

So LinkedIn, you were great once (in valuation), but now you’re gone. To quote The Lion In Winter – “The sun was warmer then…”

Shine on you crazy diamond!

Jill Kennedy – OnMedea