Recently in News Corp. Category

YES!

But only Viacom's cable networks and digital assets.  CBS (not wanting to leave the cocoon of Old Media) should buy Viacom's Paramount Pictures.

Is there any chance in hell this could actually happen?  Could Rupert Murdoch pull off an acquisition of that magnitude?

No fucking way.  Not while old man Redstone continues to draw a breath.

So, yes, it's most likely a non-starter.  But even in a fantasy scenario, wouldn't it be great to finally get rid of Viacom and Redstone?  Both are simply a mess and completely unnecessary. 

[Note:  I realize Sumner Redstone is Chairman of the Board and majority stockholder of CBS, but Les Moonves is the much more appealing face of that company, not Sumner.  Sumner is the face of Viacom... and the media world has had enough.]

Imagine News Corp (which has the weakest portfolio of cable assets save Fox News, FX and those regional sports thingies) with Viacom's cable channels: MTV, Nickelodeon, Comedy Central, TV Land, VH1, etc. etc. 

This would immediately fill all News Corp's demographic needs and, in the digital channel universe, put them on par with Time Warner, Disney and, in late 2010, Comcast. 

Viacom was never going to be on par with anyone as long as Sumner is around (even with those assets)... so it's time to shut it down.

As for CBS and their acquisition of Paramount Pictures... they, obviously, just want to be an old media company and ride that peaceful, easy feeling all the way into the grave.  Buying Paramount Pictures (and, hey, why not MGM while they're at it!) would help realize that mid-1990s-vertical-alignment-synergy-world they are striving for.  And based on Comcast's purchase of NBCU (which valued Universal Studios at less than $3 billion), Paramount, with its much smaller film and television library, can be picked up at quite a fire sale bargain.  (Wait two years and it will be even more of a bargain!)

Also, this would give CBS the opportunity to shut down the ridiculous CBS Films vanity project before it becomes a further embarrassment.

So, think about it people.  A deal like this would really be a win-win-win for everyone... and help us to get rid of (at least a part of) Sumner Redstone once and for all.

Jill Kennedy - OnMedea

STOP DOING SHIT!  Just stop it.  People have already lost their ability to focus on any one particular thing and you want to "FoxPopize" your movies? 

Let me explain.  20th Century Fox (that name is truly fitting in this case) is debuting a new service called FoxPop on the upcoming Blu-ray and DVD release of "Night At The Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian".  While a viewer is watching this horrible film, FoxPop will send out "a constant barrage of facts, photos, games and trivia questions related to the movie" to the user's Mac, PC or iPhone.

Who gives a fucking shit?! 

Do the execs at Fox Home Entertainment really think the consumer's viewing experience will be enhanced and they will, in turn, embrace and save the dying DVD business by buzzing someone's iPhone when T.rex appears on screen and asking "how many bones does this dino have?"  Most people barely have time to watch one movie a month and you're trying to waste more of their time!

It's obvious Fox has quite a bit of extra money lying around to be able to attempt this lame exercise.  But I beg you... please stop with all the bullshit and put your money where it really needs to go:  Digital downloading technology, consumer education about digital downloading and digital downloading implementation. 

That's the future - not a zapping an iPhone to tell us how many hair follicles Ben Stiller has on his head.

Jill Kennedy - OnMedea

The cover of Sarah Palin's latest work of fiction "Going Rogue: An American Life" was released today by publisher HarperCollins. 

Anyone waiting to see if Ms. Palin can write in complete sentences WON'T be able to find that out anytime soon because she didn't really write the book.  Most likely she talked into a speaker phone from her Chevy Suburban to Ghost Writer Lynn Vincent who turned Ms. Palin's incoherent thoughts into a simple, easy-to-understand prose that will further separate the growing division in America.

What do we know about Lynn Vincent?  Not much lately.  I have a feeling Ms. Vincent has been locked in Dick Cheney's bunker and will remain there until "Going Rogue: An American Life" is safely in the $1 bins at Costco (or when Ms. Palin becomes President - whichever comes first). 

What we DO know about Lynn Vincent (46) OFF-THE-RECORD is that she is a total Christian Right wacko with hardcore beliefs about abortion, gay marriage, Jews, Democrats, Muslims, etc.  In general, she's a woman with a deep hatred in her heart for all those who are not like her. 

ON THE RECORD, she's a fairly solid writer who (I'm sure) has gay and Muslim friends.  OK, maybe gay friends.  OK, in the closet gay friends.  OK, maybe not.

Over the next few weeks (until the book is released in November), there will be numerous attempts by the "Illegal-should-be-abolished" media on the left to dig up more about Ms. Vincent.  But I have a feeling she will be "unavailable for comment" (though Fox News may be able to land an "Exclusive".  Hannity will be "tough but fair" and manage to wring out what her favorite flavor of Jell-o is).

As tempting as it is to go after whatever low-hanging fruit there is on Ms. Vincent, I say the real focus should remain on Ms. Palin - who, frankly, must be stopped.

Somewhere buried in the digital universe there is further proof that she is completely out of her mind and... dangerous.  For the good of the world, it is our duty to dig it up before she writes again.

Jill Kennedy - OnMedea

P.S. - Sarah, you should have gone more "Coulter" with your cover.  The men want to see you in a black mini-dress (especially Sean Hannity and his repressed sexual urges).