Prometheus
With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen
“Prometheus!”
Finally!
I gathered my supplies – for movie ogling and note taking, sweet sticky bud smoked in my car.
The a large coke.
No popcorn.
The greasy corn turns my note sheets into transparent unreading mush.
Now for reviewing I drink the kossu.
But trouble is in a dangling Damocles sword over my head.
So much kossu has been in my mouth hole that I must get a liver ultrasound tomorrow!
How is this can possible?
Is this the end for Kimmo?
Is this the end for kossu?
I am the bummer… but wow – “Prometheus!”
Considered one of the great directors in 30 years, has in some of the best films in the field of science fiction (and others) and with each new film attracts audiences from simple village idiots to up hardcore cinephiles.
His name is Ridley Scott and has nothing to prove anything anymore.
Except for “Gladiator.”
That movie was more the funny than “Monty Python And The Holy Grail” but still a shit log.
The legendary “Alien” is undoubtedly the expected movies of the year and shortly before he had released the movie trailer was enough to cause a frenzy of fans.
And geeks are frenzied bunch!
Virgins can get nasty.
Plot? Hells yeah!
The mythical Prometheus created the first humans from clay and fire (made sense while stoned – now suspect).
The spacecraft “Prometheus”, Scott starts from the realm of uncertainty to come to the eternal mystery of the origin of the first man.
The theories on the creation of man from the aliens are not new, their roots hold thousands of years since man began to think consciously and carved on the walls.
Conscious men never got their deposits back.
Do not carve on the walls.
Or let your cat pee on the carpet.
From the first minutes of the film and the spectacular opening of the thirsty viewer (a large coke is quickly drunken when the sweet bud is in my head) is confronted with all these unanswered questions in a 3D world (damn, 3D that worked!) abundant charm and a spectacle that nourishes the eye and excites the imagination.
The work done in special effects and generally in all the scenery is truly worthy of attention and the most rigorous and demanding audience.
Also the cast of Scott in the film include Michael Fassbender and Charlize Theron as “robot” and “ruthless woman” respectively and are highly successful.
Charlize has given me two cinematic boners in my pants this year.
This is a good year for Kimmo!
Noomi Rapace is the good. No shit.
She is the girl in a shrink-to-fit-with-blow-dryer space suit that showed her a good ass actor.
So confusion comes. Is this cinematic boner for Noomi or Charlize?
Do I really care?
So, two thumbs throbbing like my love of the Charl-oomi.
I want. And then I want more.
The view is the almost obligatory to all lovers of science fiction and general lovers of the dark room.
Go see this thing.
Twice.
Kimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium
P.S. “Game of Thrones” season 2 in the books. We have White Walkers in Finland. We call them “drunk relatives in the snow.” They are less scary in Finland but smell worse. Now, back to my bong and the worry thoughts that will bring me to tomorrow. If I must not drink of the kossu, is live worth living? These thoughts must be thought.
Awesome film. Awesome review. I’m normally hesitant for 3D, but it really does add something to this movie as many reviews have said – not gimmicky at all.
I don’t see this film even coming close to the original. Casting is a big reason. Veronica Cartwright was spectacular as an embodiment of the audience’s fears. John Hurt. Yaphet Kotto. Tom Skerritt. Ian Holm. The original put on a clinic on how to cast a film.
Don’t care what any people say but thanks Ridley Scott for making Hollywood green light this movie…
So? Anything? (what?)
Charlize Theron (blue ribbon in ass).
Noomi Rapace (haven’t checked out ass). So what the **** with the movie? This is the review you wrote 3 months ago? You needed more of the time? I need more. No Kusso. No bud. Not for you. Until after when your brain comes down from the writing.
Where the hell can I get Kimmo t-shirt? My t-shirts all worn out.
Just got back from seeing this. It was OK. Not as good as Alien or Blade Runner. The ending sets it up so there can be sequel if this is a blockbuster. Seems that a whole lot more people were lined up for Madagascar, though.
I so agree with Beerhammer of Galen (it’s ME!).
Kimmo is my guide to the movies. He told me shit. Previews told me shit. Trailers? Shit. Send Ridley Scott to my place (tomorrow morning would be better, tonight, not so good.)
Canadian (me). Beer now, bud later (VERY CONSERVATIVE).
Okay, if no t-shirt, 8 x 12 Kimmo glossy. Will go to local mall where they make Care Bear t-shirts. I can handle this on my own.
Beerhammer, “Charlize has given me two cinematic boners in my pants this year” is enough to get me to this thing.
Although, I was going anyway
I saw the movie at the midnight release and I was very satisfied with it – the best of the Alien franchise since Alien in my opinion. While it’s technically not an Aliens movie, it has the same feel and vibe to it as Alien did, especially the themes of man’s place in the universe, who created us, why, etc.
The first half of the movie I found somewhat interesting but laughed throughout the second half. Very disappointing.
The whole superior woman thing was pushed into the realm of physiologic delusions! common!>>> have you ever witnessed someone moving around after a C-section? This girl performed more unbelievable and unrealistic feats of strength than could ever be done by a 5’2″ 110 lb person. I know it is sci-fi but the human characters are not the endowed super creatures, just simply human. And the super human was out done by what???? a pixie!
Prometheus is a big disappointment. If I wanted to see an inane, incomprehensible and existentially superficial film, I would watch one of Terrence Malick’s. Scott tried too hard to give meaning to this film and he totally screwed it up. Give me Alien or even Aliens over this mess.
I agree with Wizard, this movie was missing something, a bit too hollow, and baseless; also some what predictable and lacking in reason. Cant see going to see the sequel if it will not really develop a plot worth thinking about. Superficial seems to describe this film adequately, just glad I didn’t shell out any of my own money to see the flick.
Kimmo calm down. It wasn’t that good. I thought the film was going to be much better than it was…. I was really expecting something spectacular and visually it was, but the characters were shadows of the original ones and the ending made me chuckle. “Seriously?” was the thought that entered my head. Good entertainment but not something I’d watch again…..Can say I was only slightly scared once in the film,while the original film gave me flashbacks for months.
Kimmo, love you, man. But you are wrong wrong wrong. so wrong, wow. Where do I start with this film. The visuals are nothing short of incredible. The story started out with a great tempo and a strong building block but then the whole thing just fell apart. There was almost zero charactor building so you could not really attatch yourself to anyone. The story then become very disconnected and it was almost like watching 2 storylines that were on the same track but never merged. By the end of the film the 8 of us that went were laughing at both the dialouge and the story line. It turned into a mess. Ridley Scott was a master in his prime, but sadly his prime has long since passed. This movie was AWFUL.
I saw it, needed more mythology. I didn’t find it particularly scary and I don’t think it deserved an R rating. PG-13 would have been fine. Wished it would have given more answers. Just kind of left things hanging.
excellent review, Kimmo. You had me at “but still a shit log”.
This movie was so disappointing. The actors seemed like a bunch of actors trying to act. I can’t believe this movie was made by the same person who made Alien.
What are you talking about Kimmo? I walked out of this movie because it was so bad! And Aliens is one of my all time favorite movies.
Dear, sweet Kimmo — we miss you! Did you finally meet your dream girl Ginnifer and ahem, end up in hospital?
Excellent..i really liked ur reviews
Worst review I have ever seen, all movies included. And seriously what is wrong with “the Holy Grail” ?