R.I.P.D. [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, RIPD, R.I.P.D., Robert Schwentke, Phil Hay, Matt Manfredi, David Dobkin, Peter Lenkov, Jeff Bridges, Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Bacon, Mary-Louise Parker, Stephanie Szostak, James Hong, Marisa Miller, Robert Knepper, Mike O'Malley, Devin Ratray, Larry Joe Campbell, Michael Coons, Christina Everett, Michael Two, Lonnie Farmer, Piper Mackenzie Harris, Ben Sicane, Duncan Putney, Bill Mootos, Kortney Adams, Michael Yebba, David Curtis, Kachina Dechert, Cheryl McMahon, Georgia Lyman, Matt McColm, Catherine Kresge, John Burke, Joe Stapleton, Michael Steven Costello, Naheem Garcia, Lance Greene, Tobias Segal, Toby Huss, Mike Judge, Jon Olson, Diana Afonso, Zoe Aggeliki, Charlie Alejandro, Mel Alejandro, Kilo Alexander, Emmalyn Anderson, Jacqueline Asbury, Stephanie Atkinson, Morgan Berhard, Ronald Boone, David Boston, Van Brockmann, Paul Bronk, Jeff Buco, Rick Burtt, Nicholas Cairis, Anthony Celona, Seth Chitwood, Jonathan Cornett, Diane Curran, Nick Dash, Bob Dio, Aaron Dorsey, Samantha Durand, Alexandra East, Kimberly Evan, Eric Ferraz, Steve Flynn, Shawn Fogarty, Jim Ford, Jane Forrestal, John Franchi, Victor Franko, Chris Fries, Kimberly Giardino, James Gifford, Suzanne Gilles, Jayne Costello Goode, Jon Gould, Rosemary Howard, Frankie Imbergamo, Stacey Forbes Iwanicki, Timothy Jacobs, Robert Kenney, J Parker Kent, Joshua Koopman, Stephen Kyle, Jason Leal, Daniel Lwoney, John Macey, Tom Mariano, Jeff Martineau, Adriano Masciarelli, Robert Masiello, Tricia Clift McCrone, Mariano Mendoza, Thomas Miller, Chillie Mo, Christine Moody, Ken Murray, Dillon O'Donnell, Chris Palermo, Steve Perry, D.J. Pierce, Laura Pizzuti, Christopher S Porter, Suzanne Prunty, David Pulson, Carrie Ann Quinn, Donna Glee Reim, Erin Reinhard, Jonathan Retamoza-Davila, Floyd Richardson, Gary Roscoe, Manajhjanihe Royalle, Kathryn Shasha, Dakota Shepard, Morgane Slemp, Donny Soares, Matt Soscia, Cody Sousa, Matthew Spinale, Franz Strassmann, Strea, David Struffolino, Josh Sussman, Bill Thorpe, Lucia Vecchio, George Vezina, David Weindel, Mike Wendt, Mary Wexler, Jamie Christopher White, Chris Whitney, James Wilcox, Wes Williams, Jimmy Wong, Tony Wright, William Xifaras, Adam Zalt, David Dobkin, Michael Fottress. Keith Goldberg, Peter Lenkov, Ori Marmur, Jonathon Komack Martin, Neal Moritz, Mike Richardson, Christophe Beck, Alwin Kuchler, Mark Helfrich, Carolyn Pickman, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, Lori Agostino, Priscilla Elliott, David Scott, Susan Lyall, Frank Cuomo, Robin Le Chanu, Lisa Rodgers, Jason Altieri, David Ellis, Frank Capra, Luke Crawford, Kevin Thomas Roy, Kimberly Aguirre, Eric Olin Anderson, Bethany Andriuzzo, Stephanie Atkinson, Alyssa Barnes, Sean Becker, Alix Belleville, Diane Benton, Jacob Brades, Jessie Bridges, Mike Buonanno, Christine Colburn, Kelly Cronin, Jane Finn Foley, Jeremy Fiske, Mollie Vera Grace, Chase Hall, Kate Jurdi, Catherine Kagan, Paul Kahl, Jessica Lamendella, Peter Lowe, Rebecca Locke, Chuck Slavin, Paul Anthony Speziale

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, RIPD, R.I.P.D., Robert Schwentke, Phil Hay, Matt Manfredi, David Dobkin, Peter Lenkov, Jeff Bridges, Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Bacon, Mary-Louise Parker, Stephanie Szostak, James Hong, Marisa Miller, Robert Knepper, Mike O'Malley, Devin Ratray, Larry Joe Campbell, Michael Coons, Christina Everett, Michael Two, Lonnie Farmer, Piper Mackenzie Harris, Ben Sicane, Duncan Putney, Bill Mootos, Kortney Adams, Michael Yebba, David Curtis, Kachina Dechert, Cheryl McMahon, Georgia Lyman, Matt McColm, Catherine Kresge, John Burke, Joe Stapleton, Michael Steven Costello, Naheem Garcia, Lance Greene, Tobias Segal, Toby Huss, Mike Judge, Jon Olson, Diana Afonso, Zoe Aggeliki, Charlie Alejandro, Mel Alejandro, Kilo Alexander, Emmalyn Anderson, Jacqueline Asbury, Stephanie Atkinson, Morgan Berhard, Ronald Boone, David Boston, Van Brockmann, Paul Bronk, Jeff Buco, Rick Burtt, Nicholas Cairis, Anthony Celona, Seth Chitwood, Jonathan Cornett, Diane Curran, Nick Dash, Bob Dio, Aaron Dorsey, Samantha Durand, Alexandra East, Kimberly Evan, Eric Ferraz, Steve Flynn, Shawn Fogarty, Jim Ford, Jane Forrestal, John Franchi, Victor Franko, Chris Fries, Kimberly Giardino, James Gifford, Suzanne Gilles, Jayne Costello Goode, Jon Gould, Rosemary Howard, Frankie Imbergamo, Stacey Forbes Iwanicki, Timothy Jacobs, Robert Kenney, J Parker Kent, Joshua Koopman, Stephen Kyle, Jason Leal, Daniel Lwoney, John Macey, Tom Mariano, Jeff Martineau, Adriano Masciarelli, Robert Masiello, Tricia Clift McCrone, Mariano Mendoza, Thomas Miller, Chillie Mo, Christine Moody, Ken Murray, Dillon O'Donnell, Chris Palermo, Steve Perry, D.J. Pierce, Laura Pizzuti, Christopher S Porter, Suzanne Prunty, David Pulson, Carrie Ann Quinn, Donna Glee Reim, Erin Reinhard, Jonathan Retamoza-Davila, Floyd Richardson, Gary Roscoe, Manajhjanihe Royalle, Kathryn Shasha, Dakota Shepard, Morgane Slemp, Donny Soares, Matt Soscia, Cody Sousa, Matthew Spinale, Franz Strassmann, Strea, David Struffolino, Josh Sussman, Bill Thorpe, Lucia Vecchio, George Vezina, David Weindel, Mike Wendt, Mary Wexler, Jamie Christopher White, Chris Whitney, James Wilcox, Wes Williams, Jimmy Wong, Tony Wright, William Xifaras, Adam Zalt, David Dobkin, Michael Fottress. Keith Goldberg, Peter Lenkov, Ori Marmur, Jonathon Komack Martin, Neal Moritz, Mike Richardson, Christophe Beck, Alwin Kuchler, Mark Helfrich, Carolyn Pickman, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, Lori Agostino, Priscilla Elliott, David Scott, Susan Lyall, Frank Cuomo, Robin Le Chanu, Lisa Rodgers, Jason Altieri, David Ellis, Frank Capra, Luke Crawford, Kevin Thomas Roy, Kimberly Aguirre, Eric Olin Anderson, Bethany Andriuzzo, Stephanie Atkinson, Alyssa Barnes, Sean Becker, Alix Belleville, Diane Benton, Jacob Brades, Jessie Bridges, Mike Buonanno, Christine Colburn, Kelly Cronin, Jane Finn Foley, Jeremy Fiske, Mollie Vera Grace, Chase Hall, Kate Jurdi, Catherine Kagan, Paul Kahl, Jessica Lamendella, Peter Lowe, Rebecca Locke, Chuck Slavin, Paul Anthony SpezialeR.I.P.D. 

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Our brains can be crap.

Yes, this happens.

We think the excited, only for the suck to rise.

Why can this be for the happening?

We crave good.

I will give anything more than ever the chances it (“good movie, please Odin” speaks my brain) deserves.

I am for wanting every movie that is watched to be the greatness that was “Shark Night 3D”.

The universe thinks I deserve a worsening. So the universe makes me be with “R.I.P.D.”

Lord.

A mess this is in my mind place. My brain crap is now confusion.

I have seen this movie!

Three times.

“Men Are Black,” “Men Are Black II,” and “Men Are Black III (in 3D!).”

Tommy Lee Jones (“Abraham Lincoln Laywer”) and Will Smith (“Legend I Am”) put their good foot right in the ass while kicking. New thoughts and stories made my face a happy smile place.

Now this crap. Ugh.

Plot? You know it. I mean, you really know it. I go on anyway.

Nick the Cop (Ryan Reynolds) is killed by Hayes (Kevin Bacon – here, one degree from toilet water). Nick goes to Dilbert Heaven – corporate Heaven would really be Hell, although having the hot, hot, hot Mary-Louise Parker (is she really almost 49? – her soul must have been rented to the devil) there gives it some hope – and he (Nick) gets to become “Death Cop – Deado Killer.”

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, RIPD, R.I.P.D., Robert Schwentke, Phil Hay, Matt Manfredi, David Dobkin, Peter Lenkov, Jeff Bridges, Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Bacon, Mary-Louise Parker, Stephanie Szostak, James Hong, Marisa Miller, Robert Knepper, Mike O'Malley, Devin Ratray, Larry Joe Campbell, Michael Coons, Christina Everett, Michael Two, Lonnie Farmer, Piper Mackenzie Harris, Ben Sicane, Duncan Putney, Bill Mootos, Kortney Adams, Michael Yebba, David Curtis, Kachina Dechert, Cheryl McMahon, Georgia Lyman, Matt McColm, Catherine Kresge, John Burke, Joe Stapleton, Michael Steven Costello, Naheem Garcia, Lance Greene, Tobias Segal, Toby Huss, Mike Judge, Jon Olson, Diana Afonso, Zoe Aggeliki, Charlie Alejandro, Mel Alejandro, Kilo Alexander, Emmalyn Anderson, Jacqueline Asbury, Stephanie Atkinson, Morgan Berhard, Ronald Boone, David Boston, Van Brockmann, Paul Bronk, Jeff Buco, Rick Burtt, Nicholas Cairis, Anthony Celona, Seth Chitwood, Jonathan Cornett, Diane Curran, Nick Dash, Bob Dio, Aaron Dorsey, Samantha Durand, Alexandra East, Kimberly Evan, Eric Ferraz, Steve Flynn, Shawn Fogarty, Jim Ford, Jane Forrestal, John Franchi, Victor Franko, Chris Fries, Kimberly Giardino, James Gifford, Suzanne Gilles, Jayne Costello Goode, Jon Gould, Rosemary Howard, Frankie Imbergamo, Stacey Forbes Iwanicki, Timothy Jacobs, Robert Kenney, J Parker Kent, Joshua Koopman, Stephen Kyle, Jason Leal, Daniel Lwoney, John Macey, Tom Mariano, Jeff Martineau, Adriano Masciarelli, Robert Masiello, Tricia Clift McCrone, Mariano Mendoza, Thomas Miller, Chillie Mo, Christine Moody, Ken Murray, Dillon O'Donnell, Chris Palermo, Steve Perry, D.J. Pierce, Laura Pizzuti, Christopher S Porter, Suzanne Prunty, David Pulson, Carrie Ann Quinn, Donna Glee Reim, Erin Reinhard, Jonathan Retamoza-Davila, Floyd Richardson, Gary Roscoe, Manajhjanihe Royalle, Kathryn Shasha, Dakota Shepard, Morgane Slemp, Donny Soares, Matt Soscia, Cody Sousa, Matthew Spinale, Franz Strassmann, Strea, David Struffolino, Josh Sussman, Bill Thorpe, Lucia Vecchio, George Vezina, David Weindel, Mike Wendt, Mary Wexler, Jamie Christopher White, Chris Whitney, James Wilcox, Wes Williams, Jimmy Wong, Tony Wright, William Xifaras, Adam Zalt, David Dobkin, Michael Fottress. Keith Goldberg, Peter Lenkov, Ori Marmur, Jonathon Komack Martin, Neal Moritz, Mike Richardson, Christophe Beck, Alwin Kuchler, Mark Helfrich, Carolyn Pickman, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, Lori Agostino, Priscilla Elliott, David Scott, Susan Lyall, Frank Cuomo, Robin Le Chanu, Lisa Rodgers, Jason Altieri, David Ellis, Frank Capra, Luke Crawford, Kevin Thomas Roy, Kimberly Aguirre, Eric Olin Anderson, Bethany Andriuzzo, Stephanie Atkinson, Alyssa Barnes, Sean Becker, Alix Belleville, Diane Benton, Jacob Brades, Jessie Bridges, Mike Buonanno, Christine Colburn, Kelly Cronin, Jane Finn Foley, Jeremy Fiske, Mollie Vera Grace, Chase Hall, Kate Jurdi, Catherine Kagan, Paul Kahl, Jessica Lamendella, Peter Lowe, Rebecca Locke, Chuck Slavin, Paul Anthony SpezialeReally.

He is paired with Tommy Lee Jo- No.

Shit! He is paired with Roy (Jeff Bridges) who talks with his mouth like he has had a stroke.

Or two.

They are disguised to be a Chinese and Hot Boob-ula Chick (Marisa Miller – so hot when on the page and not moving, not so hot when talking). We must never know they are just actors, acting badly.

They are after “Deados” – dead people who are escaping the movie to get to a real life. Like T.V.’s “Reaper”, only less good stuff.

Nick wants to be with his not dead wife again.

Did it happen? Did I care?

Did I drink so much Kossu that the last 25 minutes where placed in a brain blender to be remembered as “whoooosh”?

I don’t know. No. And yes.

This hot mess did not direct itself. No. First, the story board was published in 2001 (now are you nerds happy?). Then Robert Schwentke needed money and said “sure!  I’ll poop one out for ya!”

Voila! “R.I.P.D.”

Why, Hollywood, why?

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, RIPD, R.I.P.D., Robert Schwentke, Phil Hay, Matt Manfredi, David Dobkin, Peter Lenkov, Jeff Bridges, Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Bacon, Mary-Louise Parker, Stephanie Szostak, James Hong, Marisa Miller, Robert Knepper, Mike O'Malley, Devin Ratray, Larry Joe Campbell, Michael Coons, Christina Everett, Michael Two, Lonnie Farmer, Piper Mackenzie Harris, Ben Sicane, Duncan Putney, Bill Mootos, Kortney Adams, Michael Yebba, David Curtis, Kachina Dechert, Cheryl McMahon, Georgia Lyman, Matt McColm, Catherine Kresge, John Burke, Joe Stapleton, Michael Steven Costello, Naheem Garcia, Lance Greene, Tobias Segal, Toby Huss, Mike Judge, Jon Olson, Diana Afonso, Zoe Aggeliki, Charlie Alejandro, Mel Alejandro, Kilo Alexander, Emmalyn Anderson, Jacqueline Asbury, Stephanie Atkinson, Morgan Berhard, Ronald Boone, David Boston, Van Brockmann, Paul Bronk, Jeff Buco, Rick Burtt, Nicholas Cairis, Anthony Celona, Seth Chitwood, Jonathan Cornett, Diane Curran, Nick Dash, Bob Dio, Aaron Dorsey, Samantha Durand, Alexandra East, Kimberly Evan, Eric Ferraz, Steve Flynn, Shawn Fogarty, Jim Ford, Jane Forrestal, John Franchi, Victor Franko, Chris Fries, Kimberly Giardino, James Gifford, Suzanne Gilles, Jayne Costello Goode, Jon Gould, Rosemary Howard, Frankie Imbergamo, Stacey Forbes Iwanicki, Timothy Jacobs, Robert Kenney, J Parker Kent, Joshua Koopman, Stephen Kyle, Jason Leal, Daniel Lwoney, John Macey, Tom Mariano, Jeff Martineau, Adriano Masciarelli, Robert Masiello, Tricia Clift McCrone, Mariano Mendoza, Thomas Miller, Chillie Mo, Christine Moody, Ken Murray, Dillon O'Donnell, Chris Palermo, Steve Perry, D.J. Pierce, Laura Pizzuti, Christopher S Porter, Suzanne Prunty, David Pulson, Carrie Ann Quinn, Donna Glee Reim, Erin Reinhard, Jonathan Retamoza-Davila, Floyd Richardson, Gary Roscoe, Manajhjanihe Royalle, Kathryn Shasha, Dakota Shepard, Morgane Slemp, Donny Soares, Matt Soscia, Cody Sousa, Matthew Spinale, Franz Strassmann, Strea, David Struffolino, Josh Sussman, Bill Thorpe, Lucia Vecchio, George Vezina, David Weindel, Mike Wendt, Mary Wexler, Jamie Christopher White, Chris Whitney, James Wilcox, Wes Williams, Jimmy Wong, Tony Wright, William Xifaras, Adam Zalt, David Dobkin, Michael Fottress. Keith Goldberg, Peter Lenkov, Ori Marmur, Jonathon Komack Martin, Neal Moritz, Mike Richardson, Christophe Beck, Alwin Kuchler, Mark Helfrich, Carolyn Pickman, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, Lori Agostino, Priscilla Elliott, David Scott, Susan Lyall, Frank Cuomo, Robin Le Chanu, Lisa Rodgers, Jason Altieri, David Ellis, Frank Capra, Luke Crawford, Kevin Thomas Roy, Kimberly Aguirre, Eric Olin Anderson, Bethany Andriuzzo, Stephanie Atkinson, Alyssa Barnes, Sean Becker, Alix Belleville, Diane Benton, Jacob Brades, Jessie Bridges, Mike Buonanno, Christine Colburn, Kelly Cronin, Jane Finn Foley, Jeremy Fiske, Mollie Vera Grace, Chase Hall, Kate Jurdi, Catherine Kagan, Paul Kahl, Jessica Lamendella, Peter Lowe, Rebecca Locke, Chuck Slavin, Paul Anthony SpezialeMust all summer flicks be regurgitated Franken-films that am made from the body parts of other movies. Or be a clone of previous clone movies?

As long as the dollars flow to box offices like Kossu flows to my liver nightly we will be seeing the Franken-films forever. Damn…

My thumbs are weird and confusing. They twitched when things went boom. They twitched when the Hot Boob-ula Chick would walk in the slo-mo.

They twitched when I ran out of the most delicious ice cream Bon Bons even chewed by a man (me).

So, for this “R.I.P.D.” I had epileptic thumbs. Pointing every direction but up.

Tell your eyes to wait for “The Conjuring” or “The Smurfs 2.” I kid about the Smurfs. I would rather be shot in the face and eaten by weasels.

I speak the truth.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “Breaking Bad” is about to come to an ending. My sadness is bulging for there will be no more shows to see to. My love for this T.V. showing is so great that I will name my fantasy hockey club “Team Heisenberg” this year. If this is beyond your understanding sign up with Netflix and watch the damn show. Yesterday.

You’re welcome.

HEY – NOW “LIKE” ME ON FACEBOOK PLEASE!

X-Men: First Class [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, X-Men: First Class, Matthew Vaughn, Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, Jane Goldman, Sheldon Turner, Bryan Singer, james McAvoy, Laurence Belcher, Michael Fassbender, Bill Milner, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, Beth Goddard, Morgan Lily Oliver Platt, Alex Gonzalez, Jason Flemying, Zoe Kravitz, January Jones, Nicholas Hoult, Caleb Landry Jones, Edi Gathegi, Corey Johnson, Lucas Till, Demetri Goritsas, Glenn Morshower, Matt Craven, James Remer, Ludger Pistor, Wilfried Hochholdinger, Greg Kolpakchi, Andrei Zayats, Rade Serbedzija, Ray Wise, Michael Medeiros, Olek Krupa, Yuri Naumkin, Gene Farber, David Agranov, Katrine De Candole, James Faulkner, Eva Magyar, Annabelle Wallis, Juan Herrera, Greg Savage, Jarid Faubel, Gregory Cox, Josh Cohen, David Crow, Kieran Patrick Campbell, Sasha Pieterse, Brendan Fehr, Michael Ironside, Jason Beghe, Venya Marzyuk, Tony Curran, Randall Batinkoff, Peter Stark, Leonard Redlich, Carols Besse Peres, Neil Fingleton, Marios, Georg Nikoloff, Arthur Karbinyan, Sean Brown, Don Creech, Hugh Jackman, Gregory Goodman, Simon Kinberg, Stan Lee, Josh McLaglen, Tarquin Pack, Lauren Shuler Donner, Henry Jackman, John Mathieson, Eddie Hamilton, Lee Smith, Vincent Agostino, David Arnold, Lee Cleary, John Arbuckle, Vanessa Beck, Daniel Booko, Susan Boyajian, Stephen Jones, Leonie Mansfield, Ashley Stowell

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, X-Men: First Class, Matthew Vaughn, Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, Jane Goldman, Sheldon Turner, Bryan Singer, james McAvoy, Laurence Belcher, Michael Fassbender, Bill Milner, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, Beth Goddard, Morgan Lily Oliver Platt, Alex Gonzalez, Jason Flemying, Zoe Kravitz, January Jones, Nicholas Hoult, Caleb Landry Jones, Edi Gathegi, Corey Johnson, Lucas Till, Demetri Goritsas, Glenn Morshower, Matt Craven, James Remer, Ludger Pistor, Wilfried Hochholdinger, Greg Kolpakchi, Andrei Zayats, Rade Serbedzija, Ray Wise, Michael Medeiros, Olek Krupa, Yuri Naumkin, Gene Farber, David Agranov, Katrine De Candole, James Faulkner, Eva Magyar, Annabelle Wallis, Juan Herrera, Greg Savage, Jarid Faubel, Gregory Cox, Josh Cohen, David Crow, Kieran Patrick Campbell, Sasha Pieterse, Brendan Fehr, Michael Ironside, Jason Beghe, Venya Marzyuk, Tony Curran, Randall Batinkoff, Peter Stark, Leonard Redlich, Carols Besse Peres, Neil Fingleton, Marios, Georg Nikoloff, Arthur Karbinyan, Sean Brown, Don Creech, Hugh Jackman, Gregory Goodman, Simon Kinberg, Stan Lee, Josh McLaglen, Tarquin Pack, Lauren Shuler Donner, Henry Jackman, John Mathieson, Eddie Hamilton, Lee Smith, Vincent Agostino, David Arnold, Lee Cleary, John Arbuckle, Vanessa Beck, Daniel Booko, Susan Boyajian, Stephen Jones, Leonie Mansfield, Ashley StowellX-Men: First Class

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

I can declare X-Men: First Class the best since the mutant melee X2!  Is this saying much?  What?

As direct by Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake and The Stepping Donkey – as well as the stupid Kick Ass), this prequel is chaotic and baggy and too long, but watchable often funny strange, and occasionally a flash of cold steel.

It’s the Swinging 60s’ and telepathic brainbox Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) and his shape-shifting pal Raven (a blue colored sexpot Jennifer Lawrence – seen recently but much less hot in “Winter’s Bone”) are coming to terms with their mutant powers.

Contacted by CIA operatives Moira MacTaggert (Rose Byrne), who is tracking maleable mutant mastermind Sebastian Shaw (Kevin Bacon from “Footloose”), Xavier agrees to share his expertise on Mutation.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, X-Men: First Class, Matthew Vaughn, Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, Jane Goldman, Sheldon Turner, Bryan Singer, james McAvoy, Laurence Belcher, Michael Fassbender, Bill Milner, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, Beth Goddard, Morgan Lily Oliver Platt, Alex Gonzalez, Jason Flemying, Zoe Kravitz, January Jones, Nicholas Hoult, Caleb Landry Jones, Edi Gathegi, Corey Johnson, Lucas Till, Demetri Goritsas, Glenn Morshower, Matt Craven, James Remer, Ludger Pistor, Wilfried Hochholdinger, Greg Kolpakchi, Andrei Zayats, Rade Serbedzija, Ray Wise, Michael Medeiros, Olek Krupa, Yuri Naumkin, Gene Farber, David Agranov, Katrine De Candole, James Faulkner, Eva Magyar, Annabelle Wallis, Juan Herrera, Greg Savage, Jarid Faubel, Gregory Cox, Josh Cohen, David Crow, Kieran Patrick Campbell, Sasha Pieterse, Brendan Fehr, Michael Ironside, Jason Beghe, Venya Marzyuk, Tony Curran, Randall Batinkoff, Peter Stark, Leonard Redlich, Carols Besse Peres, Neil Fingleton, Marios, Georg Nikoloff, Arthur Karbinyan, Sean Brown, Don Creech, Hugh Jackman, Gregory Goodman, Simon Kinberg, Stan Lee, Josh McLaglen, Tarquin Pack, Lauren Shuler Donner, Henry Jackman, John Mathieson, Eddie Hamilton, Lee Smith, Vincent Agostino, David Arnold, Lee Cleary, John Arbuckle, Vanessa Beck, Daniel Booko, Susan Boyajian, Stephen Jones, Leonie Mansfield, Ashley StowellMeanwhile, Holocaust survivor Erik Lehnsherr (Michael Fassbender) is using his mutant powers to cut bloody swathes through Europe and South America in the search for Shaw, who transjected him to unspeakable Horrors in a Nazi concentration camp.

As Lehnsherr’s activities put him on Xavier’s radar, the boffin manages to convince the magnetic avenger to join the team of mutants he’s assembling to take Shaw down.

Yes!

Using technology devised by the genius mutant Hank McCoy (Nicolas Hoult), the duo begin to recruit and train a gifted crop of youngsters and as Shaw unleashes a devilish scheme to wipe out mankind, it’s up to these ‘X-Men’ to save the day.

What?

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, X-Men: First Class, Matthew Vaughn, Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, Jane Goldman, Sheldon Turner, Bryan Singer, james McAvoy, Laurence Belcher, Michael Fassbender, Bill Milner, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, Beth Goddard, Morgan Lily Oliver Platt, Alex Gonzalez, Jason Flemying, Zoe Kravitz, January Jones, Nicholas Hoult, Caleb Landry Jones, Edi Gathegi, Corey Johnson, Lucas Till, Demetri Goritsas, Glenn Morshower, Matt Craven, James Remer, Ludger Pistor, Wilfried Hochholdinger, Greg Kolpakchi, Andrei Zayats, Rade Serbedzija, Ray Wise, Michael Medeiros, Olek Krupa, Yuri Naumkin, Gene Farber, David Agranov, Katrine De Candole, James Faulkner, Eva Magyar, Annabelle Wallis, Juan Herrera, Greg Savage, Jarid Faubel, Gregory Cox, Josh Cohen, David Crow, Kieran Patrick Campbell, Sasha Pieterse, Brendan Fehr, Michael Ironside, Jason Beghe, Venya Marzyuk, Tony Curran, Randall Batinkoff, Peter Stark, Leonard Redlich, Carols Besse Peres, Neil Fingleton, Marios, Georg Nikoloff, Arthur Karbinyan, Sean Brown, Don Creech, Hugh Jackman, Gregory Goodman, Simon Kinberg, Stan Lee, Josh McLaglen, Tarquin Pack, Lauren Shuler Donner, Henry Jackman, John Mathieson, Eddie Hamilton, Lee Smith, Vincent Agostino, David Arnold, Lee Cleary, John Arbuckle, Vanessa Beck, Daniel Booko, Susan Boyajian, Stephen Jones, Leonie Mansfield, Ashley StowellThere’s much about First Class that’s X-ceptional (ha ha, I did it!) not least of all the casting of the equally admirable McAvoy and Fassbender as the two men whose warring ideologies give X-Men stories so much more abyss than the average comic book yarn.

As X-Men creator Stan Lee has always maintained, Xavier and Lehnsherr are based on Martin Luther King and Malcolm X, setting the tale at the height of the American civil rights movement is something of a master-stroke.

It also allow the director Vaughn to indulge in some far out 60s’ referencing, from depicting Lehnsherr as a smooth 007-style assassin to setting the action-packed finish against the backdrop of the Cuban Missile Crisis.

Scripted on high by Vaughn’s Kick-Ass collaborator Jane Goldman, it’s ironic that’s the most youth-orientated X-Men adventure is as well the most adult.  What?

Along with startlingly effective moments of violence and a slinky sexiness that’s likely to leave comic book nerds needing a lie down, there’s even the dropping of a well-timed F-bomb in a priceless cameo.

X-Men films have always been about the strength of the ensemble cast, and Vaughn has put together a fine group of young actors who work together with an easy charm and restless unease; Hoult and Lawrence’s (wow, that girl!) tentative romance being particularly effective.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, X-Men: First Class, Matthew Vaughn, Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, Jane Goldman, Sheldon Turner, Bryan Singer, james McAvoy, Laurence Belcher, Michael Fassbender, Bill Milner, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, Beth Goddard, Morgan Lily Oliver Platt, Alex Gonzalez, Jason Flemying, Zoe Kravitz, January Jones, Nicholas Hoult, Caleb Landry Jones, Edi Gathegi, Corey Johnson, Lucas Till, Demetri Goritsas, Glenn Morshower, Matt Craven, James Remer, Ludger Pistor, Wilfried Hochholdinger, Greg Kolpakchi, Andrei Zayats, Rade Serbedzija, Ray Wise, Michael Medeiros, Olek Krupa, Yuri Naumkin, Gene Farber, David Agranov, Katrine De Candole, James Faulkner, Eva Magyar, Annabelle Wallis, Juan Herrera, Greg Savage, Jarid Faubel, Gregory Cox, Josh Cohen, David Crow, Kieran Patrick Campbell, Sasha Pieterse, Brendan Fehr, Michael Ironside, Jason Beghe, Venya Marzyuk, Tony Curran, Randall Batinkoff, Peter Stark, Leonard Redlich, Carols Besse Peres, Neil Fingleton, Marios, Georg Nikoloff, Arthur Karbinyan, Sean Brown, Don Creech, Hugh Jackman, Gregory Goodman, Simon Kinberg, Stan Lee, Josh McLaglen, Tarquin Pack, Lauren Shuler Donner, Henry Jackman, John Mathieson, Eddie Hamilton, Lee Smith, Vincent Agostino, David Arnold, Lee Cleary, John Arbuckle, Vanessa Beck, Daniel Booko, Susan Boyajian, Stephen Jones, Leonie Mansfield, Ashley StowellBacon is also in fantastic acting shape as the sneering villain.  January Jones, regardless of various scenes with bra and panties pushed up, is fairly forgettable as his sidekick Emma Frost – even with her bustiness on display.

Jason Flemyng’s teleporting terror Azazel is scary enough to ensure the bad guys are satisfyingly formidable.

Capturing the spirit of the previous films without desperately struggling to achieve continuity with the theme, Vaughn portrays these familiar characters with honesty and gives them a strong origin story.

That rings true, nodding to past installments, without being overly reverent.

Unfortunately, it’s some wobbly CGI reminiscent of the disappointing X-Men Origins: Wolverine, and a rushed speed that prevents First Class from being the superhero equivalent of JJ Abrams’s Star Trek reboot fantastic.

With an extra six months in post-production and a less ramshackle edit, this easily must have been the best X-Men movie ever.

It is very close regardless, and its forms of Professor X downing a yard of ale for chatting up the girls down the pub has classic scene for the ages written all over it.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – Behind The Proscenium (Kimmo On Kino)