Men In Black 3 With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Men In Black. They took my great-grandparents’ out to a field. Then in the head brain shot. Dead. Not funny. Fucking Nazis. Then movie times. “Men In Black” sprays on Finland. Funny? Hells to the…
Battleship With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Once again, the youth is easy picking for the child predators. Our youth be the memories. The predator? Hollywood. Again. B4 – Hit! But in an inappropriate way on my child thoughts. J1 – Miss! But not for…
The Five-Year Engagement With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen First, cliché joke (I will not be the single sayer of this) – “The Five-Year Engagement” is also what seems to be the running time of the film. It goes on. And on. And then on…
The Lucky One With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen I am lucky. I am cursed. My job is to have the most wonderful at a time thing to do than anything. Pay me? Don’t have to (just kidding, Kyrle – I love money!)! Lucky. Then…
The Cabin In The Woods With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen “Previews.” “Trailers” (as in the industry the name is whispered). “Coming Attractions” to the elderly who are always cold and cry at the loudness of noise (and smell like liver sausage, if lucky). No…
American Reunion With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Kimmo was in trouble. Big trouble. Last week I had super cool “Wrath of the Titans” review that I made. Then the dumbness strikes. I e-mail copy of review to my Uncle Tukka who is in living…
The Hunger Games With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen I have waited for this longer than time may seem to you. Or even longer. So when the cinema doors opened I was fully ready for an eyeball party! Yes, “The Hunger Games” is finally open….
Project X With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Thanks to Odin. Much thanks. Why? Tuesday, with the fact that Tuesday must happen, happens. Tuesday? Reviewing assignments for Friday. My mind is sweating mind thoughts: “Please Odin, if I am to review that damn “Lorax” movie,…
Wanderlust With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Sad writing times still sad. To you, one less ferret. To me, one less heart string by rodent warmed (Ed. Note – see last week. Sad.). Movies? Films? Cinema? Do now I even care? Well. Yes. I am…
Ghost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Many apologies for the writing lack for two weeks. Fluffy the Wonder Ferret, greatest animal in history, crossed the Rainbow Bridgeand now feasts on ferret food with Jesus – and other ferrets who also…
Man On A Ledge With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Action and adventure in January? What is this film “Man on a Ledge”? Is Hollywood sucking more smoky bong openings than film reviewers (ME!)? Oh, my mind anticipates with wet quivering smart action fun. Also…
The Artist With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Confusion. In the cinema. Topped off with Kossu shots. Warm. Now for the reviewing the movie I see. Then sick joke! 4:3 picture. Black and white. No talking. WTF?!? Elaborate joke on Kimmo? Alcohol time travelling? Heaven?…
Coriolanus With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen What? Not 100% CGI? No robot alien things? Am I high (yes, I am)? Then soldiers. My brain screams – You are within the stuck times of “Battle: Los Angeles!” The worst of fates that mine could be……
The Iron Lady With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen WTF?!? My mind is a stream of mud. Confusion. Weed. Not reading the press kit. “The Iron Lady” is not a sequel to “The Iron Giant”. The excitement made my area hurt. Meryl Streep vs. Vin…
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen Sweden. Bastards. While us, the Finns, fought Soviet Russia the Swedes ate butter, fish, and those damn crap meatballs. In same war (World War II, retards) we fight and fight. Sweden? Neutral (sissy…