Men In Black 3 [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Men In Black 3, Men In Black III, Barry Sonnenfeld, Etan Cohen, Lowell Cunningham, David Koepp, Jeff Nathanson, Michael Soccio, Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Jemaine Clement, Emma Thompson, Michael Stuhlbarg, Mike Colter, Nicole Scherzinger, Michael Chermus, Michael Chemus, Alice Eve, David Rasche, Keone Young, Bill Hader, Cayen Martin, Clarke Thorell, Adam Mucci, Tom McComas, Douglas Crosby, Woodie King Jr, Jack O'Connell, Tobias Segal, Jon Shaver, Geritt Vandermeer, Alexandra O'Hara, Violet O'Hara, Valence Thomas, Chloe Sonnenfeld, Lanny Flaherty, Jonathan O'Hara, Rick Baker, Joseph D'onofrio, Joseph R. Gannascoli, Katy Frame, Kevin Townley, Stephen Brian Jones, Tyler Johnson, Kati Rediger, Victor Joel Ortiz, Charlie Barnett, Ian Blackman, Jeremy Beiler, Liliane Klein, Britt Johnson, Jared Johnston, Ken Arnold, Jonathan Drew, Joel Brady, David Pittu, Lenny Venito, Anthony J. Gallo, James Martin Kelly, Will McLaughlin, Kimmy Suzuki, Kirk Larsen, Javier Jose Rivera Nieves, Susan Ringo, Stephanie Ellis, Ben Mac Brown, Amy Erwitt, Amanda Greer, Brandon Lee Harris, Joseph M. Abbott, Brad Abrell, January Adams, Karin Agstam, Frank Amoruso, Todd Anthony, Aprella, Andrew Ayala, Jennifer Bartels, Justin Bieber, Dan Bittner, Rachel Black, Peter Bond, Tim Burton, Geoffrey Cantor, Jared Christopherson, Scott Churchson, Stephen Cofield, David Cohen, Kevin Covais, Alan Davis, Michael Dean, Walter DeForest, Joseph Dimartino, Joe Dolinsky, Michael Donaldson, Robin Ellsworth, Robert Farrior, Lady Gaga, Roy William Gardner, Chris Gober, Darryl Reuben Hall, Michael C. Hoaglin, Nikki Holister, Allen Holloway, Mike Holt, Rosemary Howard, Rodney Jackson, Michael Jeremiah, Jian, Tony Joe, Tony Kost, Erin Lindsey Krom, Bocker T. Labradoodle, Addison LeMay, Paul Jue Letersky, David Leviev, Jason Liles, Chuck Lines, Elizabeth Logan, Benjamin Lott, Yuri Lowenthal, David Macerelli, Ronald Scott Maestri, Raymond Mamrak, Tom Margiotta, Marti Matulis, Josh McBride, Michael McDonald, Randall McNeal, Dorothy Meyers, John Mitchell, Olan Montgomery, Dushawn MOses, Michelle Nagell, Brittany Natale, Marcos Mateo Ochoa, Nancy Ozelli, Loukas Papas, Mark Parker, Mark Perrone, Perri Pierre, Frederick Pina, Mike Pyle, Kevin Randleman, Dennis Rees, Sean Roman, Joseph L. Rubino, Tyler Rumsey, Saba, Michelle Santiago, Chuck Schanamann, David Adam Smith, Nate Steinwachs, Jamaal Stone, Jay Storey, Jane Taylor, Francesca Tedeschi, Wesley Tunison, Joe Urban, Eha Urbsalu, Steven Vigil, Adrian Winther, John Zion, Alex Zjwak, G. Mac Brown, Laurie MacDonald, Walter F. Parkes, Steven Spielberg, Danny Elfman, Bill Pope, Wayne Wahman, Don Zimmerman, Ellen Chenoweth, Bo Welch, Kasra Farahani, Luke Freebom, W. Steven Graham, Susan Bode, Erika Abberton, Pierce Austin, Billy Bonifield, Carol Cuddy, Erica Kay, Lea Lambert, Holly Rymon, Haley sweet, Patty Willett, David Catalano, Doug Coleman, Simon Crane, Michelle Flevotomas, Scott Koche, Woodrow Travers, Stuart Valberg, Stephen Izzi, Drew Leary, Dawn Noel, Kevin Rogers, Aaron Vexler, Bill Abbott, Pete Anthony, Bill Ahern, Lina Albelo, Raci Alexander, Jonathan Argudo, Douglas Armitage, Mary Bailey, Tamara Bally, Alexander Barrow, Ainsley Bartholomew, Clayton Beisner, Stuart Berberich, Will Blagrove, Kate Bolger, Janice Brabaw, Molly Brolin, Anthony Buck, Jamie Buckner, Renee Burke, Christina Chow, Tiffany Chung, Richard Connors, Kelly Cook, Alex Craig, George Daratany, Ethan Duffy, Logan Wolfe Edler, John Edmundson, Katie Ennis, Marissa Fiore, Daniel Florio, Chapel Folger, Karl Frankenfield, Suzanne Friedline, Anouk Frosch, Kantarama Gahigiri, Derek Garcia, Ed Gately, Carolina Gimenez, Timothy Goldberg, Kyle Gorjanc, Mark Hagerman, Cyrano Hardy, Greg Highsmith, Jonathan Hoeg, Ben Thomas Holley, Jonathan Hook, David Hsu, Samantha Humphreys, Chad Matthew Hursa, Cory Kadamani, Jason Kadlec, Paul Kahil, Paul Kwo, Nito Larioza, Kyle Lavore, Ivette Ledon, Brian Lee, Adam Levy, Feifei Ling, Raya Madrid, Rich Moody, Tim O'Connor, Hyo Park, Zachary Parris, James Parson, Brittany Rostron, Rosanna Server, Aaron Speiser, Craig Striano, Rob Tode, Susana Torres, Samantha Treiber, Michael Truths, Bryan Webster, Philippe Vonlanthen, Steve Viola, Anthony Genovese, Phillip Phillips, Jessica Sanchez, Vidar The Norse God of Silence

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Men In Black 3, Men In Black III, Barry Sonnenfeld, Etan Cohen, Lowell Cunningham, David Koepp, Jeff Nathanson, Michael Soccio, Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Jemaine Clement, Emma Thompson, Michael Stuhlbarg, Mike Colter, Nicole Scherzinger, Michael Chermus, Michael Chemus, Alice Eve, David Rasche, Keone Young, Bill Hader, Cayen Martin, Clarke Thorell, Adam Mucci, Tom McComas, Douglas Crosby, Woodie King Jr, Jack O'Connell, Tobias Segal, Jon Shaver, Geritt Vandermeer, Alexandra O'Hara, Violet O'Hara, Valence Thomas, Chloe Sonnenfeld, Lanny Flaherty, Jonathan O'Hara, Rick Baker, Joseph D'onofrio, Joseph R. Gannascoli, Katy Frame, Kevin Townley, Stephen Brian Jones, Tyler Johnson, Kati Rediger, Victor Joel Ortiz, Charlie Barnett, Ian Blackman, Jeremy Beiler, Liliane Klein, Britt Johnson, Jared Johnston, Ken Arnold, Jonathan Drew, Joel Brady, David Pittu, Lenny Venito, Anthony J. Gallo, James Martin Kelly, Will McLaughlin, Kimmy Suzuki, Kirk Larsen, Javier Jose Rivera Nieves, Susan Ringo, Stephanie Ellis, Ben Mac Brown, Amy Erwitt, Amanda Greer, Brandon Lee Harris, Joseph M. Abbott, Brad Abrell, January Adams, Karin Agstam, Frank Amoruso, Todd Anthony, Aprella, Andrew Ayala, Jennifer Bartels, Justin Bieber, Dan Bittner, Rachel Black, Peter Bond, Tim Burton, Geoffrey Cantor, Jared Christopherson, Scott Churchson, Stephen Cofield, David Cohen, Kevin Covais, Alan Davis, Michael Dean, Walter DeForest, Joseph Dimartino, Joe Dolinsky, Michael Donaldson, Robin Ellsworth, Robert Farrior, Lady Gaga, Roy William Gardner, Chris Gober, Darryl Reuben Hall, Michael C. Hoaglin, Nikki Holister, Allen Holloway, Mike Holt, Rosemary Howard, Rodney Jackson, Michael Jeremiah, Jian, Tony Joe, Tony Kost, Erin Lindsey Krom, Bocker T. Labradoodle, Addison LeMay, Paul Jue Letersky, David Leviev, Jason Liles, Chuck Lines, Elizabeth Logan, Benjamin Lott, Yuri Lowenthal, David Macerelli, Ronald Scott Maestri, Raymond Mamrak, Tom Margiotta, Marti Matulis, Josh McBride, Michael McDonald, Randall McNeal, Dorothy Meyers, John Mitchell, Olan Montgomery, Dushawn MOses, Michelle Nagell, Brittany Natale, Marcos Mateo Ochoa, Nancy Ozelli, Loukas Papas, Mark Parker, Mark Perrone, Perri Pierre, Frederick Pina, Mike Pyle, Kevin Randleman, Dennis Rees, Sean Roman, Joseph L. Rubino, Tyler Rumsey, Saba, Michelle Santiago, Chuck Schanamann, David Adam Smith, Nate Steinwachs, Jamaal Stone, Jay Storey, Jane Taylor, Francesca Tedeschi, Wesley Tunison, Joe Urban, Eha Urbsalu, Steven Vigil, Adrian Winther, John Zion, Alex Zjwak, G. Mac Brown, Laurie MacDonald, Walter F. Parkes, Steven Spielberg, Danny Elfman, Bill Pope, Wayne Wahman, Don Zimmerman, Ellen Chenoweth, Bo Welch, Kasra Farahani, Luke Freebom, W. Steven Graham, Susan Bode, Erika Abberton, Pierce Austin, Billy Bonifield, Carol Cuddy, Erica Kay, Lea Lambert, Holly Rymon, Haley sweet, Patty Willett, David Catalano, Doug Coleman, Simon Crane, Michelle Flevotomas, Scott Koche, Woodrow Travers, Stuart Valberg, Stephen Izzi, Drew Leary, Dawn Noel, Kevin Rogers, Aaron Vexler, Bill Abbott, Pete Anthony, Bill Ahern, Lina Albelo, Raci Alexander, Jonathan Argudo, Douglas Armitage, Mary Bailey, Tamara Bally, Alexander Barrow, Ainsley Bartholomew, Clayton Beisner, Stuart Berberich, Will Blagrove, Kate Bolger, Janice Brabaw, Molly Brolin, Anthony Buck, Jamie Buckner, Renee Burke, Christina Chow, Tiffany Chung, Richard Connors, Kelly Cook, Alex Craig, George Daratany, Ethan Duffy, Logan Wolfe Edler, John Edmundson, Katie Ennis, Marissa Fiore, Daniel Florio, Chapel Folger, Karl Frankenfield, Suzanne Friedline, Anouk Frosch, Kantarama Gahigiri, Derek Garcia, Ed Gately, Carolina Gimenez, Timothy Goldberg, Kyle Gorjanc, Mark Hagerman, Cyrano Hardy, Greg Highsmith, Jonathan Hoeg, Ben Thomas Holley, Jonathan Hook, David Hsu, Samantha Humphreys, Chad Matthew Hursa, Cory Kadamani, Jason Kadlec, Paul Kahil, Paul Kwo, Nito Larioza, Kyle Lavore, Ivette Ledon, Brian Lee, Adam Levy, Feifei Ling, Raya Madrid, Rich Moody, Tim O'Connor, Hyo Park, Zachary Parris, James Parson, Brittany Rostron, Rosanna Server, Aaron Speiser, Craig Striano, Rob Tode, Susana Torres, Samantha Treiber, Michael Truths, Bryan Webster, Philippe  Vonlanthen, Steve Viola, Anthony Genovese, Phillip Phillips, Jessica Sanchez, Vidar The Norse God of SilenceMen In Black 3

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Men In Black.

They took my great-grandparents’ out to a field.

Then in the head brain shot.

Dead.

Not funny.

Fucking Nazis.

Then movie times.

“Men In Black” sprays on Finland.

Funny?

Hells to the yeah!

Aliens!

Crashes!

Fresh Prince!

“Men In Black 2”?  Nice.  Not necessary.

Saw it three times while feeling up the boob of Anita Krakhousenen (her boobs were for to make the manhood mine – and then some!  Until this day I will remember… more than a handful).

To say that Men in Black 3″ is the best installment in the trilogy, there is only that we are moving briskly.

Plot?  Maybe.

It all starts in a maximum security prison located on the Moon.

Boris Boglodite, fearsome creature played by Jermaine Clement, managed to escape and return to Earth with the goal of death of Constable K (Tommy Lee Jones), which put him in the nuts (THE NUTS!) in the late 60s, and the enslavement of our planet.

To achieve his goals, he uses a machine to explore time and changes the course of history.

Faced with the catastrophic consequences of acts of Boris, Agent J (Will Smith) has only one solution – to turn the plunge and find themselves pushed in 1969 to try to put things in order.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Men In Black 3, Men In Black III, Barry Sonnenfeld, Etan Cohen, Lowell Cunningham, David Koepp, Jeff Nathanson, Michael Soccio, Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Jemaine Clement, Emma Thompson, Michael Stuhlbarg, Mike Colter, Nicole Scherzinger, Michael Chermus, Michael Chemus, Alice Eve, David Rasche, Keone Young, Bill Hader, Cayen Martin, Clarke Thorell, Adam Mucci, Tom McComas, Douglas Crosby, Woodie King Jr, Jack O'Connell, Tobias Segal, Jon Shaver, Geritt Vandermeer, Alexandra O'Hara, Violet O'Hara, Valence Thomas, Chloe Sonnenfeld, Lanny Flaherty, Jonathan O'Hara, Rick Baker, Joseph D'onofrio, Joseph R. Gannascoli, Katy Frame, Kevin Townley, Stephen Brian Jones, Tyler Johnson, Kati Rediger, Victor Joel Ortiz, Charlie Barnett, Ian Blackman, Jeremy Beiler, Liliane Klein, Britt Johnson, Jared Johnston, Ken Arnold, Jonathan Drew, Joel Brady, David Pittu, Lenny Venito, Anthony J. Gallo, James Martin Kelly, Will McLaughlin, Kimmy Suzuki, Kirk Larsen, Javier Jose Rivera Nieves, Susan Ringo, Stephanie Ellis, Ben Mac Brown, Amy Erwitt, Amanda Greer, Brandon Lee Harris, Joseph M. Abbott, Brad Abrell, January Adams, Karin Agstam, Frank Amoruso, Todd Anthony, Aprella, Andrew Ayala, Jennifer Bartels, Justin Bieber, Dan Bittner, Rachel Black, Peter Bond, Tim Burton, Geoffrey Cantor, Jared Christopherson, Scott Churchson, Stephen Cofield, David Cohen, Kevin Covais, Alan Davis, Michael Dean, Walter DeForest, Joseph Dimartino, Joe Dolinsky, Michael Donaldson, Robin Ellsworth, Robert Farrior, Lady Gaga, Roy William Gardner, Chris Gober, Darryl Reuben Hall, Michael C. Hoaglin, Nikki Holister, Allen Holloway, Mike Holt, Rosemary Howard, Rodney Jackson, Michael Jeremiah, Jian, Tony Joe, Tony Kost, Erin Lindsey Krom, Bocker T. Labradoodle, Addison LeMay, Paul Jue Letersky, David Leviev, Jason Liles, Chuck Lines, Elizabeth Logan, Benjamin Lott, Yuri Lowenthal, David Macerelli, Ronald Scott Maestri, Raymond Mamrak, Tom Margiotta, Marti Matulis, Josh McBride, Michael McDonald, Randall McNeal, Dorothy Meyers, John Mitchell, Olan Montgomery, Dushawn MOses, Michelle Nagell, Brittany Natale, Marcos Mateo Ochoa, Nancy Ozelli, Loukas Papas, Mark Parker, Mark Perrone, Perri Pierre, Frederick Pina, Mike Pyle, Kevin Randleman, Dennis Rees, Sean Roman, Joseph L. Rubino, Tyler Rumsey, Saba, Michelle Santiago, Chuck Schanamann, David Adam Smith, Nate Steinwachs, Jamaal Stone, Jay Storey, Jane Taylor, Francesca Tedeschi, Wesley Tunison, Joe Urban, Eha Urbsalu, Steven Vigil, Adrian Winther, John Zion, Alex Zjwak, G. Mac Brown, Laurie MacDonald, Walter F. Parkes, Steven Spielberg, Danny Elfman, Bill Pope, Wayne Wahman, Don Zimmerman, Ellen Chenoweth, Bo Welch, Kasra Farahani, Luke Freebom, W. Steven Graham, Susan Bode, Erika Abberton, Pierce Austin, Billy Bonifield, Carol Cuddy, Erica Kay, Lea Lambert, Holly Rymon, Haley sweet, Patty Willett, David Catalano, Doug Coleman, Simon Crane, Michelle Flevotomas, Scott Koche, Woodrow Travers, Stuart Valberg, Stephen Izzi, Drew Leary, Dawn Noel, Kevin Rogers, Aaron Vexler, Bill Abbott, Pete Anthony, Bill Ahern, Lina Albelo, Raci Alexander, Jonathan Argudo, Douglas Armitage, Mary Bailey, Tamara Bally, Alexander Barrow, Ainsley Bartholomew, Clayton Beisner, Stuart Berberich, Will Blagrove, Kate Bolger, Janice Brabaw, Molly Brolin, Anthony Buck, Jamie Buckner, Renee Burke, Christina Chow, Tiffany Chung, Richard Connors, Kelly Cook, Alex Craig, George Daratany, Ethan Duffy, Logan Wolfe Edler, John Edmundson, Katie Ennis, Marissa Fiore, Daniel Florio, Chapel Folger, Karl Frankenfield, Suzanne Friedline, Anouk Frosch, Kantarama Gahigiri, Derek Garcia, Ed Gately, Carolina Gimenez, Timothy Goldberg, Kyle Gorjanc, Mark Hagerman, Cyrano Hardy, Greg Highsmith, Jonathan Hoeg, Ben Thomas Holley, Jonathan Hook, David Hsu, Samantha Humphreys, Chad Matthew Hursa, Cory Kadamani, Jason Kadlec, Paul Kahil, Paul Kwo, Nito Larioza, Kyle Lavore, Ivette Ledon, Brian Lee, Adam Levy, Feifei Ling, Raya Madrid, Rich Moody, Tim O'Connor, Hyo Park, Zachary Parris, James Parson, Brittany Rostron, Rosanna Server, Aaron Speiser, Craig Striano, Rob Tode, Susana Torres, Samantha Treiber, Michael Truths, Bryan Webster, Philippe  Vonlanthen, Steve Viola, Anthony Genovese, Phillip Phillips, Jessica Sanchez, Vidar The Norse God of SilenceIf Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones have with an infection joy their respective archetypes (the cool talkative and taciturn cranky), a third actor they blithely steals the show through an irresistible performance.

This is Josh Brolin, who was the George Bush and Oliver Stone plays here an Agent K the younger.  Via a hilarious imitation of Tommy Lee Jones, a game of mimicry and an amazing little help cosmetic, the illusion is perfect.

So, in your face!

Now my stoner brain is in crisis.

Josh Brolin in this movie?  Or greatest actor Tommy Lee Jones making me think that Josh Brolin is the Tommy Lee Jones?

Son of a bitch.

This movie is hard.

Who is who?

What the hell?

The good rises so high that right here there is only a high five given.  To myself.

You are left to hang.

Favorite for me is the alien freak show.  From their time of the 60s (and some 70s) we find a passion for laughing at the past.

Now is so cool.  The past is for crap.

We have neck beards now and are the hip!

Everything before 2005 is a joke for on the farting!

I’m so fucking cool.  I’m wearing a fedora!

Sorry.  The Lemon Stank Weed throws me on a tangent.

“Men In Black 3” was cool.

Why do I let Hollywood rile me so?

I still wait for “Prometheus.”

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  HAAAAA!!!!  American Idol!!!!   I called it 10 weeks ago!!!!!  WGWG#5!!!!!!  Vidar, you can suck it!!!!!  Phillip Phillips is the motherfucking man!!!  If Dave Mathews dies…

Battleship [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Battleship, Peter Berg, Erich Hoeber, Jon Hoeber, Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgard, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Tadanobu Asano, Hamish Linklater, Liam Neeson, Peter MacNicol, John Tui, Jesse Plemons, Gregory Gadson, Jerry Ferrara, Adam Godley, Rico McClinton, Joji Yoshida, Louis Lombardi, Norman Vincent McLafferty, Stephen Bishop, Dante Jimenez, Daven Arce, Ralph Richardson, Biunca Love, Michael Sherman, Austin Naulty, Patricia Brown, Gregory Harvey, James Rawlings, Andrew Serpas, Damien Seanard Parker, Carson Aune, Doug Penty, Josh Pence, Jason Henderson, Brint Terrell, Brad Faucheux, Dustin Reno, John Schmotzer, Jonathon Groves, Lloyd Pitts, Ryan Tinio, Allie Sillah, John Santiago, Kiley Margeson, Jeffrey Johns, Esther Solomon, Kevin Garlington, Anthony Czumalowski, James Hadde, Pat Lancaster, Jordan Kirkwood, Jane Dubiel, John A. Weaver, Mark Lindquist, Phil Neilson, Dane Justman, Dustin Watchman, Drew Rausch, Ryland Reamy, Donald Willcutt, Eli Miranda, Josh Demuth, Thomas Grieser, Chris Darling, Tyrone Gregg, Brian Hirono, Yutaka Takeuchi, Nobuharu Harada, Masaomi Uchida, Kyle Ken Shimabukuro, Masashi Takekawa, Hyoe Joe Takahashi, Rick Hoffman, Stephen Baldini, Bill Stinchcomb, Bruce Mandell, Gary Grubbs, David Jensen, Mike Meldman, Hunter Meldman, George Arine, Bill McMullen, Joe Chrest, Benjamin Lloyd, Billy Slaughter, Griff Furst, Terri Battee, Angelo Denova, Colby Parker, Geoff Clayton, David Kors, Christopher McGahan, Kerry Cahill, Liz Wicker, Michelle Arthur, Natalia Castellanos, Dan Cooke, Leni Ito, Jay Jackson, Jackie Johnson, Frank Doyle, Robin Atkin Downes, Zach Selwyn, Leonard Rogers, Citizen Cope, Evan Bernard, Cora Yamagata, Frank Cassavetes, Thomas McCurdy, Robert Hotalen, Rami Malek, Ray Mabus, Marissa Nordhelm, Ronald Chavez, Legrand Strickland, Michael Vernon, Jason Wilken, James Ward, Phillip Trifilo, William Powers, Donald Dailey, Bill Carr, Dennis M. Keating, Garrett Lynch, Wallace Mackensen, William Long, Edward Drew, John Culkin, Hiram Fong, Larry Wegger, Dallas Kane Hewitt, Adam Sibley, James Rish, George O'Hanlon, Wesley Phelps, Marcus Lyle Brown, Kyle Russell Clements, Kevin P. Kearns, John Bell, Conor McCarry, Dylan Gillooly, Adrian Bellani, Tom Cain, Philip Trifilo, Teresa Alvarez, Luing Andrews, Reila Aphrodite, Joshua Aucoin, Fileena Bahris, Joanne Bahris, Tim Blanchard, Raj K. Bose, Beau Brasseaux, Curtis Bush, Edward J. Clare, Davo Coria, Kamakani De Dely, Annie Doiron, Paul Edney, Kerry Ellington, Kasey Emas, Gregory Allen Gabroy, Jaq Galliano, Mickey Graue, Paul Gunawan, Martin William Harris, Dakota Hill, Sean Douglas Hoban, Kailtlin Hoychick, James Koons, Anthony A. Kung, Greg Liem, Rebecca Maltby, Wes Martinez, Ed Moy, Jane Runnalls, Rhonda Schaubert, Barbara Southern, Kelly R. Thomas, Lauren Thomas, Michael Wozniak, Elvin Yoshida, Todd Arnow, Sarah Aubrey, Chen On Chu, Brian Goldner, Duncan Henderson, Bennett Schneir, Scott Stuber, Steve Jablonsky, Tobias Schliessler, Colby Parker, Billy Rich, Paul Rubell, Neil Spisak, Candice Campos, Renee Confair, Michael Malone, Wendy Wong, Sean Stratton, Matt Goldstein, Eric Heffron, Hideaki Jimbo, Lemon Liu, Michael J. Moore, Phil Neilson, Richard Oswald, Taylor Phillips, Basti Van Der Woude, Andrew Ward, Marvin Williams, Lloyd Barachina, Hunter Baxley, Damon Caro, Gene Harline, Scott Hunter, Ben Jensen, Don King, Sara Hartman, Kevin Hickman, Justin Yates, Zack Bartow, David Becker, Leif Akaji, Amanda Avanzino, Frank Barnett, Tyler Belcik, John Bellina, Chuck Bennethum, Monty Bennett, William Wyatt Blomingdale, Matthew Bonneau, Shawn Booth, Kara Bowman, Lisa Calhoun, Damien Callais, Timmy Chinn, Katrin Chong, Shalyn Clark, Jessica Cole, Kyle Cooper, Zane Crump, Drew Maximillion Davis, Brittney Diez, Sophia Dilley, Travis Fontenot, Michael Galasso, Rhett Guillot, Cheri Hall, Parker Haynes, nancy Honeycutt, Rachel Jacob, Evan Johnson, Jodiah Johnson, Peter Jones, Kim Ju, Nathan Kimball, Nicole Kiele Matteson, Shauna Moss, Crystal Munson, Bill Phillips, Stockton David Porter, Ryan Redmond, Kim Ronstadt, Johnny Santiago, Andy Scott, Caroline Seale, Allen Taylor, Karla Torres, Kanesha Washington, Richard Wilson, Bonnie Campanella, Pablo Paz, Michael L. Smith

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Battleship, Peter Berg, Erich Hoeber, Jon Hoeber, Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgard, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Tadanobu Asano, Hamish Linklater, Liam Neeson, Peter MacNicol, John Tui, Jesse Plemons, Gregory Gadson, Jerry Ferrara, Adam Godley, Rico McClinton, Joji Yoshida, Louis Lombardi, Norman Vincent McLafferty, Stephen Bishop, Dante Jimenez, Daven Arce, Ralph Richardson, Biunca Love, Michael Sherman, Austin Naulty, Patricia Brown, Gregory Harvey, James Rawlings, Andrew Serpas, Damien Seanard Parker, Carson Aune, Doug Penty, Josh Pence, Jason Henderson, Brint Terrell, Brad Faucheux, Dustin Reno, John Schmotzer, Jonathon Groves, Lloyd Pitts, Ryan Tinio, Allie Sillah, John Santiago, Kiley Margeson, Jeffrey Johns, Esther Solomon, Kevin Garlington, Anthony Czumalowski, James Hadde, Pat Lancaster, Jordan Kirkwood, Jane Dubiel, John A. Weaver, Mark Lindquist, Phil Neilson, Dane Justman, Dustin Watchman, Drew Rausch, Ryland Reamy, Donald Willcutt, Eli Miranda, Josh Demuth, Thomas Grieser, Chris Darling, Tyrone Gregg, Brian Hirono, Yutaka Takeuchi, Nobuharu Harada, Masaomi Uchida, Kyle Ken Shimabukuro, Masashi Takekawa, Hyoe Joe Takahashi, Rick Hoffman, Stephen Baldini, Bill Stinchcomb, Bruce Mandell, Gary Grubbs, David Jensen, Mike Meldman, Hunter Meldman, George Arine, Bill McMullen, Joe Chrest, Benjamin Lloyd, Billy Slaughter, Griff Furst, Terri Battee, Angelo Denova, Colby Parker, Geoff Clayton, David Kors, Christopher McGahan, Kerry Cahill, Liz Wicker, Michelle Arthur, Natalia Castellanos, Dan Cooke, Leni Ito, Jay Jackson, Jackie Johnson, Frank Doyle, Robin Atkin Downes, Zach Selwyn, Leonard Rogers, Citizen Cope, Evan Bernard, Cora Yamagata, Frank Cassavetes, Thomas McCurdy, Robert Hotalen, Rami Malek, Ray Mabus, Marissa Nordhelm, Ronald Chavez, Legrand Strickland, Michael Vernon, Jason Wilken, James Ward, Phillip Trifilo, William Powers, Donald Dailey, Bill Carr, Dennis M. Keating, Garrett Lynch, Wallace Mackensen, William Long, Edward Drew, John Culkin, Hiram Fong, Larry Wegger, Dallas Kane Hewitt, Adam Sibley, James Rish, George O'Hanlon, Wesley Phelps, Marcus Lyle Brown, Kyle Russell Clements, Kevin P. Kearns, John Bell, Conor McCarry, Dylan Gillooly, Adrian Bellani, Tom Cain, Philip Trifilo, Teresa Alvarez, Luing Andrews, Reila Aphrodite, Joshua Aucoin, Fileena Bahris, Joanne Bahris, Tim Blanchard, Raj K. Bose, Beau Brasseaux, Curtis Bush, Edward J. Clare, Davo Coria, Kamakani De Dely, Annie Doiron, Paul Edney, Kerry Ellington, Kasey Emas, Gregory Allen Gabroy, Jaq Galliano, Mickey Graue, Paul Gunawan, Martin William Harris, Dakota Hill, Sean Douglas Hoban, Kailtlin Hoychick, James Koons, Anthony A. Kung, Greg Liem, Rebecca Maltby, Wes Martinez, Ed Moy, Jane Runnalls, Rhonda Schaubert, Barbara Southern, Kelly R. Thomas, Lauren Thomas, Michael Wozniak, Elvin Yoshida, Todd Arnow, Sarah Aubrey, Chen On Chu, Brian Goldner, Duncan Henderson, Bennett Schneir, Scott Stuber, Steve Jablonsky, Tobias Schliessler, Colby Parker, Billy Rich, Paul Rubell, Neil Spisak, Candice Campos, Renee Confair, Michael Malone, Wendy Wong, Sean Stratton, Matt Goldstein, Eric Heffron, Hideaki Jimbo, Lemon Liu, Michael J. Moore, Phil Neilson, Richard Oswald, Taylor Phillips, Basti Van Der Woude, Andrew Ward, Marvin Williams, Lloyd Barachina, Hunter Baxley, Damon Caro, Gene Harline, Scott Hunter, Ben Jensen, Don King, Sara Hartman, Kevin Hickman, Justin Yates, Zack Bartow, David Becker, Leif Akaji, Amanda Avanzino, Frank Barnett, Tyler Belcik, John Bellina, Chuck Bennethum, Monty Bennett, William Wyatt Blomingdale, Matthew Bonneau, Shawn Booth, Kara Bowman, Lisa Calhoun, Damien Callais, Timmy Chinn, Katrin Chong, Shalyn Clark, Jessica Cole, Kyle Cooper, Zane Crump, Drew Maximillion Davis, Brittney Diez, Sophia Dilley, Travis Fontenot, Michael Galasso, Rhett Guillot, Cheri Hall, Parker Haynes, nancy Honeycutt, Rachel Jacob, Evan Johnson, Jodiah Johnson, Peter Jones, Kim Ju, Nathan Kimball, Nicole Kiele Matteson, Shauna Moss, Crystal Munson, Bill Phillips, Stockton David Porter, Ryan Redmond, Kim Ronstadt, Johnny Santiago, Andy Scott, Caroline Seale, Allen Taylor, Karla Torres, Kanesha Washington, Richard Wilson, Bonnie Campanella, Pablo Paz, Michael L. SmithBattleship 

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Once again, the youth is easy picking for the child predators.

Our youth be the memories.

The predator?

Hollywood.

Again.

B4 – Hit!  But in an inappropriate way on my child thoughts.

J1 – Miss!  But not for your lacking at the trying.

J10 – Oh, you sunk my Battleship memories of fun and now is just CGI shit-fest!  (I slap my forehead and into the lake backwards off the dock I reel, “You sunk my childhood!”).

My excitement rises like a boil in my armpit.

What’s next?  “Bingo – The Movie?”

So, it seems that sailors are the cool.

So cool that they must fight a Transformer-like army from a wet dream on the Michael Bay sheets.

Mom, his sheets need changing.

His camera moves even in the night.  It never stops.

Would that he would go blind.  Michael Bay.

And he had nothing to do with this – except inspire it – with his camera frantic wet penis dreams.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Battleship, Peter Berg, Erich Hoeber, Jon Hoeber, Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgard, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Tadanobu Asano, Hamish Linklater, Liam Neeson, Peter MacNicol, John Tui, Jesse Plemons, Gregory Gadson, Jerry Ferrara, Adam Godley, Rico McClinton, Joji Yoshida, Louis Lombardi, Norman Vincent McLafferty, Stephen Bishop, Dante Jimenez, Daven Arce, Ralph Richardson, Biunca Love, Michael Sherman, Austin Naulty, Patricia Brown, Gregory Harvey, James Rawlings, Andrew Serpas, Damien Seanard Parker, Carson Aune, Doug Penty, Josh Pence, Jason Henderson, Brint Terrell, Brad Faucheux, Dustin Reno, John Schmotzer, Jonathon Groves, Lloyd Pitts, Ryan Tinio, Allie Sillah, John Santiago, Kiley Margeson, Jeffrey Johns, Esther Solomon, Kevin Garlington, Anthony Czumalowski, James Hadde, Pat Lancaster, Jordan Kirkwood, Jane Dubiel, John A. Weaver, Mark Lindquist, Phil Neilson, Dane Justman, Dustin Watchman, Drew Rausch, Ryland Reamy, Donald Willcutt, Eli Miranda, Josh Demuth, Thomas Grieser, Chris Darling, Tyrone Gregg, Brian Hirono, Yutaka Takeuchi, Nobuharu Harada, Masaomi Uchida, Kyle Ken Shimabukuro, Masashi Takekawa, Hyoe Joe Takahashi, Rick Hoffman, Stephen Baldini, Bill Stinchcomb, Bruce Mandell, Gary Grubbs, David Jensen, Mike Meldman, Hunter Meldman, George Arine, Bill McMullen, Joe Chrest, Benjamin Lloyd, Billy Slaughter, Griff Furst, Terri Battee, Angelo Denova, Colby Parker, Geoff Clayton, David Kors, Christopher McGahan, Kerry Cahill, Liz Wicker, Michelle Arthur, Natalia Castellanos, Dan Cooke, Leni Ito, Jay Jackson, Jackie Johnson, Frank Doyle, Robin Atkin Downes, Zach Selwyn, Leonard Rogers, Citizen Cope, Evan Bernard, Cora Yamagata, Frank Cassavetes, Thomas McCurdy, Robert Hotalen, Rami Malek, Ray Mabus, Marissa Nordhelm, Ronald Chavez, Legrand Strickland, Michael Vernon, Jason Wilken, James Ward, Phillip Trifilo, William Powers, Donald Dailey, Bill Carr, Dennis M. Keating, Garrett Lynch, Wallace Mackensen, William Long, Edward Drew, John Culkin, Hiram Fong, Larry Wegger, Dallas Kane Hewitt, Adam Sibley, James Rish, George O'Hanlon, Wesley Phelps, Marcus Lyle Brown, Kyle Russell Clements, Kevin P. Kearns, John Bell, Conor McCarry, Dylan Gillooly, Adrian Bellani, Tom Cain, Philip Trifilo, Teresa Alvarez, Luing Andrews, Reila Aphrodite, Joshua Aucoin, Fileena Bahris, Joanne Bahris, Tim Blanchard, Raj K. Bose, Beau Brasseaux, Curtis Bush, Edward J. Clare, Davo Coria, Kamakani De Dely, Annie Doiron, Paul Edney, Kerry Ellington, Kasey Emas, Gregory Allen Gabroy, Jaq Galliano, Mickey Graue, Paul Gunawan, Martin William Harris, Dakota Hill, Sean Douglas Hoban, Kailtlin Hoychick, James Koons, Anthony A. Kung, Greg Liem, Rebecca Maltby, Wes Martinez, Ed Moy, Jane Runnalls, Rhonda Schaubert, Barbara Southern, Kelly R. Thomas, Lauren Thomas, Michael Wozniak, Elvin Yoshida, Todd Arnow, Sarah Aubrey, Chen On Chu, Brian Goldner, Duncan Henderson, Bennett Schneir, Scott Stuber, Steve Jablonsky, Tobias Schliessler, Colby Parker, Billy Rich, Paul Rubell, Neil Spisak, Candice Campos, Renee Confair, Michael Malone, Wendy Wong, Sean Stratton, Matt Goldstein, Eric Heffron, Hideaki Jimbo, Lemon Liu, Michael J. Moore, Phil Neilson, Richard Oswald, Taylor Phillips, Basti Van Der Woude, Andrew Ward, Marvin Williams, Lloyd Barachina, Hunter Baxley, Damon Caro, Gene Harline, Scott Hunter, Ben Jensen, Don King, Sara Hartman, Kevin Hickman, Justin Yates, Zack Bartow, David Becker, Leif Akaji, Amanda Avanzino, Frank Barnett, Tyler Belcik, John Bellina, Chuck Bennethum, Monty Bennett, William Wyatt Blomingdale, Matthew Bonneau, Shawn Booth, Kara Bowman, Lisa Calhoun, Damien Callais, Timmy Chinn, Katrin Chong, Shalyn Clark, Jessica Cole, Kyle Cooper, Zane Crump, Drew Maximillion Davis, Brittney Diez, Sophia Dilley, Travis Fontenot, Michael Galasso, Rhett Guillot, Cheri Hall, Parker Haynes, nancy Honeycutt, Rachel Jacob, Evan Johnson, Jodiah Johnson, Peter Jones, Kim Ju, Nathan Kimball, Nicole Kiele Matteson, Shauna Moss, Crystal Munson, Bill Phillips, Stockton David Porter, Ryan Redmond, Kim Ronstadt, Johnny Santiago, Andy Scott, Caroline Seale, Allen Taylor, Karla Torres, Kanesha Washington, Richard Wilson, Bonnie Campanella, Pablo Paz, Michael L. SmithI hate him.

HATE HIM.

So, like a turd in a punchbowl, “Battleship” floats.

Like the turd, we wish for its existence to end.

Like the turd, its existence is demanded.

It’s in our damn punchbowl.

Fuck.

Plot?  Really?

Are you kidding my brain?

Battleships.  Other ships.  Crazy alien shit.

Kaboom!!!!

Destroyers.  Cruise missiles.  Actors.

Kablooie!!!.  Waves.  More actors.

Fizzle.

I need a drink.

Burp.

Good things, though?  Hells yeah!.

Rhianna (character irrelevant) in shrink-to-fit with a blow-dryer body suit carrying a gun as big as a redneck making up for his short penis… Hells yeah!

She is #1 in my Masturbation Memory Bank – with a bullet (take a seat Christina Aguilera).

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Battleship, Peter Berg, Erich Hoeber, Jon Hoeber, Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgard, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Tadanobu Asano, Hamish Linklater, Liam Neeson, Peter MacNicol, John Tui, Jesse Plemons, Gregory Gadson, Jerry Ferrara, Adam Godley, Rico McClinton, Joji Yoshida, Louis Lombardi, Norman Vincent McLafferty, Stephen Bishop, Dante Jimenez, Daven Arce, Ralph Richardson, Biunca Love, Michael Sherman, Austin Naulty, Patricia Brown, Gregory Harvey, James Rawlings, Andrew Serpas, Damien Seanard Parker, Carson Aune, Doug Penty, Josh Pence, Jason Henderson, Brint Terrell, Brad Faucheux, Dustin Reno, John Schmotzer, Jonathon Groves, Lloyd Pitts, Ryan Tinio, Allie Sillah, John Santiago, Kiley Margeson, Jeffrey Johns, Esther Solomon, Kevin Garlington, Anthony Czumalowski, James Hadde, Pat Lancaster, Jordan Kirkwood, Jane Dubiel, John A. Weaver, Mark Lindquist, Phil Neilson, Dane Justman, Dustin Watchman, Drew Rausch, Ryland Reamy, Donald Willcutt, Eli Miranda, Josh Demuth, Thomas Grieser, Chris Darling, Tyrone Gregg, Brian Hirono, Yutaka Takeuchi, Nobuharu Harada, Masaomi Uchida, Kyle Ken Shimabukuro, Masashi Takekawa, Hyoe Joe Takahashi, Rick Hoffman, Stephen Baldini, Bill Stinchcomb, Bruce Mandell, Gary Grubbs, David Jensen, Mike Meldman, Hunter Meldman, George Arine, Bill McMullen, Joe Chrest, Benjamin Lloyd, Billy Slaughter, Griff Furst, Terri Battee, Angelo Denova, Colby Parker, Geoff Clayton, David Kors, Christopher McGahan, Kerry Cahill, Liz Wicker, Michelle Arthur, Natalia Castellanos, Dan Cooke, Leni Ito, Jay Jackson, Jackie Johnson, Frank Doyle, Robin Atkin Downes, Zach Selwyn, Leonard Rogers, Citizen Cope, Evan Bernard, Cora Yamagata, Frank Cassavetes, Thomas McCurdy, Robert Hotalen, Rami Malek, Ray Mabus, Marissa Nordhelm, Ronald Chavez, Legrand Strickland, Michael Vernon, Jason Wilken, James Ward, Phillip Trifilo, William Powers, Donald Dailey, Bill Carr, Dennis M. Keating, Garrett Lynch, Wallace Mackensen, William Long, Edward Drew, John Culkin, Hiram Fong, Larry Wegger, Dallas Kane Hewitt, Adam Sibley, James Rish, George O'Hanlon, Wesley Phelps, Marcus Lyle Brown, Kyle Russell Clements, Kevin P. Kearns, John Bell, Conor McCarry, Dylan Gillooly, Adrian Bellani, Tom Cain, Philip Trifilo, Teresa Alvarez, Luing Andrews, Reila Aphrodite, Joshua Aucoin, Fileena Bahris, Joanne Bahris, Tim Blanchard, Raj K. Bose, Beau Brasseaux, Curtis Bush, Edward J. Clare, Davo Coria, Kamakani De Dely, Annie Doiron, Paul Edney, Kerry Ellington, Kasey Emas, Gregory Allen Gabroy, Jaq Galliano, Mickey Graue, Paul Gunawan, Martin William Harris, Dakota Hill, Sean Douglas Hoban, Kailtlin Hoychick, James Koons, Anthony A. Kung, Greg Liem, Rebecca Maltby, Wes Martinez, Ed Moy, Jane Runnalls, Rhonda Schaubert, Barbara Southern, Kelly R. Thomas, Lauren Thomas, Michael Wozniak, Elvin Yoshida, Todd Arnow, Sarah Aubrey, Chen On Chu, Brian Goldner, Duncan Henderson, Bennett Schneir, Scott Stuber, Steve Jablonsky, Tobias Schliessler, Colby Parker, Billy Rich, Paul Rubell, Neil Spisak, Candice Campos, Renee Confair, Michael Malone, Wendy Wong, Sean Stratton, Matt Goldstein, Eric Heffron, Hideaki Jimbo, Lemon Liu, Michael J. Moore, Phil Neilson, Richard Oswald, Taylor Phillips, Basti Van Der Woude, Andrew Ward, Marvin Williams, Lloyd Barachina, Hunter Baxley, Damon Caro, Gene Harline, Scott Hunter, Ben Jensen, Don King, Sara Hartman, Kevin Hickman, Justin Yates, Zack Bartow, David Becker, Leif Akaji, Amanda Avanzino, Frank Barnett, Tyler Belcik, John Bellina, Chuck Bennethum, Monty Bennett, William Wyatt Blomingdale, Matthew Bonneau, Shawn Booth, Kara Bowman, Lisa Calhoun, Damien Callais, Timmy Chinn, Katrin Chong, Shalyn Clark, Jessica Cole, Kyle Cooper, Zane Crump, Drew Maximillion Davis, Brittney Diez, Sophia Dilley, Travis Fontenot, Michael Galasso, Rhett Guillot, Cheri Hall, Parker Haynes, nancy Honeycutt, Rachel Jacob, Evan Johnson, Jodiah Johnson, Peter Jones, Kim Ju, Nathan Kimball, Nicole Kiele Matteson, Shauna Moss, Crystal Munson, Bill Phillips, Stockton David Porter, Ryan Redmond, Kim Ronstadt, Johnny Santiago, Andy Scott, Caroline Seale, Allen Taylor, Karla Torres, Kanesha Washington, Richard Wilson, Bonnie Campanella, Pablo Paz, Michael L. SmithBrooklyn Decker’s cleavage?

If heaven was of boobs, I’m in heaven.

Liam Neeson (character irrelevant, but higher rank – not in my MMB, but in Navy) growls like a bear.

Poor Liam.  Wife dead from ski head rock, but will take any movie like a new generation Michael Caine.

I understand.  Take the money.

But, son of a bitch buddy, not this!

You sunk my “give a shit!”

Could I write more?  If, by the word paid, then yes.

But this is the summer movie shit-storm beginning.  I will see the same thing.  I will write the same thing.  Greed will overtake my mind more than the Rhianna-lust.

Shit movie is shit movie.

This reviewer is drooling on the coming of “Prometheus.”

Wrong?  I could be.

But the belief that summer BANG movies can be smarter than me?  I hope.  I believe.

As for “Battleship?”  I am sad with the thought that for some retards, this turd will float.

No.  Please.

And “no” again.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “American Idol.”  Make me proud.  White Guy With Guitar #5 FTW!!!!!!  And then disappear quickly.  That is the pattern.

The Five-Year Engagement [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo on Kino, The Five-Year Engagement, Nicholas Stoller, Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Lauren Weedman, Mimi Kennedy, David Paymer, Jacki Weaver, Jim Piddock, Eric Scott Cooper, Dakota Johnson, Jane Carr, Clement von Franckenstein, Michael Ensign, madge Levinson, Murray Miller, Eileen Grubba, Mark Rademacher, Kevin Yon, Heather Mathieson, Rhys Ifans, Mindy Kaling, Randall Park, Kevin Hart, Kumail Nanjiani, Waijid, Gerry Bednob, Tim Heidecker, Molly Shannon, Brian Posehn, Suzanne Kluce, Tracee Chimo, Chris Parnell, Gina Ragnone, Kenneth Small, Fracesca DelBanco, Stephanie Faracy, Zoe Niemkiewicz, Tyler Hamway, Michele Messmer, Fred Lindholm, Rocky Rector, Aaron Lustig, Chris Newman, Da'Vone McDonald, Laurie Brown, Nicolas Delbanco, Corey Fischer, Nicholas Totis, Stacey Whelan, Judd Apatow, Rodney Rothman, Nicholas Stoller, Richard Vane, Michael Andrews, Javier Aguirresarobe, William Kerr, Peck Prior, Julie Berghoff, John Josselyn, Leesa Evans, Ellen Arden, Leo Corey Castellano, Lisa Rodgers, Todd Havern, Michael Jordan, Cindy Taylor, Dean Backer, Andrew Adams, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Marc Fishman, Neal Garon, Larry Kemp, Goro Koyama, Joe Schiff, Greg Zimmerman, Brad Baker, Nick Cutway, Sara Andrews, Michael Babcock, Brad Burkhardt, Todd Campbell, Lisa Chau, Caryn Cheever, Geralyn Clark, Megan Goedewaagen, Ray Gordon, Susannah Greason, Thanh Hoang, Michele Horn, Suzie Kluce, Linda Long, Brenda Lopez, David Lanes, Krystal MacKnight, Adam McNinch, Debbie Merritt, David Midgen, Valerie Morasso, Peggy Mulloy, Paul Park, Eliot Parker, Leslie Quan, Anthony Ragnone, DaJuan Rippy, Lana Rivkina, Sarah Scher, Douglas Schwartz, Shawn Shaman, Carolina Solorzano, Sarah Sprague, Raymond Tankard, Belinda Tantalo

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo on Kino, The Five-Year Engagement, Nicholas Stoller, Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Lauren Weedman, Mimi Kennedy, David Paymer, Jacki Weaver, Jim Piddock, Eric Scott Cooper, Dakota Johnson, Jane Carr, Clement von Franckenstein, Michael Ensign, madge Levinson, Murray Miller, Eileen Grubba, Mark Rademacher, Kevin Yon, Heather Mathieson, Rhys Ifans, Mindy Kaling, Randall Park, Kevin Hart, Kumail Nanjiani, Waijid, Gerry Bednob, Tim Heidecker, Molly Shannon, Brian Posehn, Suzanne Kluce, Tracee Chimo, Chris Parnell, Gina Ragnone, Kenneth Small, Fracesca DelBanco, Stephanie Faracy, Zoe Niemkiewicz, Tyler Hamway, Michele Messmer, Fred Lindholm, Rocky Rector, Aaron Lustig, Chris Newman, Da'Vone McDonald, Laurie Brown, Nicolas Delbanco, Corey Fischer, Nicholas Totis, Stacey Whelan, Judd Apatow, Rodney Rothman, Nicholas Stoller, Richard Vane, Michael Andrews, Javier Aguirresarobe, William Kerr, Peck Prior, Julie Berghoff, John Josselyn, Leesa Evans, Ellen Arden, Leo Corey Castellano, Lisa Rodgers, Todd Havern, Michael Jordan, Cindy Taylor, Dean Backer, Andrew Adams, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Marc Fishman, Neal Garon, Larry Kemp, Goro Koyama, Joe Schiff, Greg Zimmerman, Brad Baker, Nick Cutway, Sara Andrews, Michael Babcock, Brad Burkhardt, Todd Campbell, Lisa Chau, Caryn Cheever, Geralyn Clark, Megan Goedewaagen, Ray Gordon, Susannah Greason, Thanh Hoang, Michele Horn, Suzie Kluce, Linda Long, Brenda Lopez, David Lanes, Krystal MacKnight, Adam McNinch, Debbie Merritt, David Midgen, Valerie Morasso, Peggy Mulloy, Paul Park, Eliot Parker, Leslie Quan, Anthony Ragnone, DaJuan Rippy, Lana Rivkina, Sarah Scher, Douglas Schwartz, Shawn Shaman, Carolina Solorzano, Sarah Sprague, Raymond Tankard, Belinda TantaloThe Five-Year Engagement

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

First, cliché joke (I will not be the single sayer of this) – “The Five-Year Engagement” is also what seems to be the running time of the film.

It goes on.

And on.

And then on some more.

The butt hurts.

The movie doesn’t care.

The movie laughs at my discomfort.

But I don’t laugh at the movie.

Which is a comedy.  Or an Apatow-medy.

So there are jokes on the dick.

The word “fuck” is used more than in “Glengarry Glen Ross.”

That is a lot of fucks.

But when people get to the fucking, all the women-types leave their tops on.  Not a boob to make me smile.

America is weird.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo on Kino, The Five-Year Engagement, Nicholas Stoller, Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Lauren Weedman, Mimi Kennedy, David Paymer, Jacki Weaver, Jim Piddock, Eric Scott Cooper, Dakota Johnson, Jane Carr, Clement von Franckenstein, Michael Ensign, madge Levinson, Murray Miller, Eileen Grubba, Mark Rademacher, Kevin Yon, Heather Mathieson, Rhys Ifans, Mindy Kaling, Randall Park, Kevin Hart, Kumail Nanjiani, Waijid, Gerry Bednob, Tim Heidecker, Molly Shannon, Brian Posehn, Suzanne Kluce, Tracee Chimo, Chris Parnell, Gina Ragnone, Kenneth Small, Fracesca DelBanco, Stephanie Faracy, Zoe Niemkiewicz, Tyler Hamway, Michele Messmer, Fred Lindholm, Rocky Rector, Aaron Lustig, Chris Newman, Da'Vone McDonald, Laurie Brown, Nicolas Delbanco, Corey Fischer, Nicholas Totis, Stacey Whelan, Judd Apatow, Rodney Rothman, Nicholas Stoller, Richard Vane, Michael Andrews, Javier Aguirresarobe, William Kerr, Peck Prior, Julie Berghoff, John Josselyn, Leesa Evans, Ellen Arden, Leo Corey Castellano, Lisa Rodgers, Todd Havern, Michael Jordan, Cindy Taylor, Dean Backer, Andrew Adams, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Marc Fishman, Neal Garon, Larry Kemp, Goro Koyama, Joe Schiff, Greg Zimmerman, Brad Baker, Nick Cutway, Sara Andrews, Michael Babcock, Brad Burkhardt, Todd Campbell, Lisa Chau, Caryn Cheever, Geralyn Clark, Megan Goedewaagen, Ray Gordon, Susannah Greason, Thanh Hoang, Michele Horn, Suzie Kluce, Linda Long, Brenda Lopez, David Lanes, Krystal MacKnight, Adam McNinch, Debbie Merritt, David Midgen, Valerie Morasso, Peggy Mulloy, Paul Park, Eliot Parker, Leslie Quan, Anthony Ragnone, DaJuan Rippy, Lana Rivkina, Sarah Scher, Douglas Schwartz, Shawn Shaman, Carolina Solorzano, Sarah Sprague, Raymond Tankard, Belinda TantaloPlot?  Sure!

The film tells the story of the couple Violet Barnes (Emily Blunt – like the blunt that was for the smoking before the film) and Tom Solomon (Jason Segelhe gets naked and is covered in moles – creepy), whose relationship becomes strained when they realize they have much longer engagement (like 5 years, duh).

For lack of time, the two delay marriage for next year and, moreover, Violet enrolls at the University of Michigan for the studying.

Then is promoted at work by her boss (asshole, with sick karate skillz), and this entails the need to move to another city.

I think.

Or the same one, but for more bad times.

When formalizing the relationship seems to move a background in the lives of two lovers, paradoxically, parents are beginning to put pressure on them to hasten the wedding.

In addition, some older relatives die and not get to see even more young people to the altar.

And die, and die, and die.

These deaths were funny.

More deaths would have been better.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo on Kino, The Five-Year Engagement, Nicholas Stoller, Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Lauren Weedman, Mimi Kennedy, David Paymer, Jacki Weaver, Jim Piddock, Eric Scott Cooper, Dakota Johnson, Jane Carr, Clement von Franckenstein, Michael Ensign, madge Levinson, Murray Miller, Eileen Grubba, Mark Rademacher, Kevin Yon, Heather Mathieson, Rhys Ifans, Mindy Kaling, Randall Park, Kevin Hart, Kumail Nanjiani, Waijid, Gerry Bednob, Tim Heidecker, Molly Shannon, Brian Posehn, Suzanne Kluce, Tracee Chimo, Chris Parnell, Gina Ragnone, Kenneth Small, Fracesca DelBanco, Stephanie Faracy, Zoe Niemkiewicz, Tyler Hamway, Michele Messmer, Fred Lindholm, Rocky Rector, Aaron Lustig, Chris Newman, Da'Vone McDonald, Laurie Brown, Nicolas Delbanco, Corey Fischer, Nicholas Totis, Stacey Whelan, Judd Apatow, Rodney Rothman, Nicholas Stoller, Richard Vane, Michael Andrews, Javier Aguirresarobe, William Kerr, Peck Prior, Julie Berghoff, John Josselyn, Leesa Evans, Ellen Arden, Leo Corey Castellano, Lisa Rodgers, Todd Havern, Michael Jordan, Cindy Taylor, Dean Backer, Andrew Adams, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Marc Fishman, Neal Garon, Larry Kemp, Goro Koyama, Joe Schiff, Greg Zimmerman, Brad Baker, Nick Cutway, Sara Andrews, Michael Babcock, Brad Burkhardt, Todd Campbell, Lisa Chau, Caryn Cheever, Geralyn Clark, Megan Goedewaagen, Ray Gordon, Susannah Greason, Thanh Hoang, Michele Horn, Suzie Kluce, Linda Long, Brenda Lopez, David Lanes, Krystal MacKnight, Adam McNinch, Debbie Merritt, David Midgen, Valerie Morasso, Peggy Mulloy, Paul Park, Eliot Parker, Leslie Quan, Anthony Ragnone, DaJuan Rippy, Lana Rivkina, Sarah Scher, Douglas Schwartz, Shawn Shaman, Carolina Solorzano, Sarah Sprague, Raymond Tankard, Belinda TantaloTroubled situation, Violet and Tom must decide quickly what they want from life and to manage better time because, otherwise, things seem to spiral out of control.

No more spoilers.

Funny things happen.  Stifler from “American Reunion” is cloned into another person named Alex (Chris Pratt) for this.

Cinema wants more of the Stiflers.  An entire mouth-word exchange is done as Cookie Monster and Elmo.

Emily Blunt is too much damn cuteness.  Things happen that are too easy.

And a taco truck. If only there was a taco truck outside of the screening place.

Man, munchies can give one the drool face…

So, two thumbs taking a nap on the sideways.

All movie inhabitants were the likable people, but the thing made two hours many more hours of feeling.  In my butt.  Until my butt went to sweet, sweet sleep.  Only to wake up at the credits – angry and painful.

Wait for DVD when it is Netflixing time.  The unrated cut will last four and a half hours – but seem like six..  Sweet Jesus!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “The Voice” is fun!  Blake Shelton is drunk!  Christina lost weight!  Cee Lo is borderline homosexual!  Adam Levine is a douch-nozzle!  No more “American Idol” for me!

The Lucky One [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Lucky One, Scott Hicks, Will Fetters, Nicholas Sparks, Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner, Riley Thomas Stewart, Jay R. Ferguson, Adam LeFevre, Robert Hayes, Joe Chrest, Russell Durham Comegys, Sharon Morris, Ann McKenzie, Kendal Tuttle, Cameron Banfield, Ritchie Montgomery, Courtney J. Clark, Trey Burvant, Gavin Reyna, Matthew Michaud, Reverend Dustin Bergene, Nedal Yousef, Naim Alherimi, Jillian Batherson, Dorian Davis, Cote Jackson, Douglas M. Griffin, Donna Heckel-Reno, Hunter Reno, Amanda Fetters, Calvin Quatroy, Marcie Antony Courtney, Michael A. Cowan, Deborah Denise Graves, Gary Harris, Melba Marie Harris, Consuella Johnson Lumas, Tina Marie Lumas, Gregory J. Probst, Valerie Diane Vaughn, Mayfield, Zigg West, Sam Knight, Jett, Bailey Celeste Sacco, Bruce Berman, Denise DiNovi, Alison Greenspan, Kerry Heysen, Kevin McCormick, Ravi Mehta, Mark Isham, Hal Lindes, Alar Kivilo, Scott Gray, Ronna Kress, Barbara Ling, Paul Kelly, Kathy Lucas, Dayna Pink, Kimberly Amacker, Bill Daly, Bob Dohrmann, Afnahn Khan, Gerson Paz, Steve Ritzi, David Sardi, Paul Uddo, Pedro Barguin, Richard Bullock, Andy Abele, Robert Baird, Phillip Kimsey, Sam Matthews, John Bissell, Donald Burdett, Christian Agypt, David Allsberry, Mac Alsfeld, Pablo Cardone, Jason Chandler, Zack Earl Edwards, Heather Fielding, Charlie French, Jeff Galpin, Meg Dudley, Bryan Gardiner, Mark Harden, Zachary Holmes, Chris Jones, Christina Killelea, Daryl Lefever, Claire Raskind, Jennifer Ray, Jayne-Ann Tenggren, Lauren Thomas, Lauren Von Huene, Jonathan Warren

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Lucky One, Scott Hicks, Will Fetters, Nicholas Sparks, Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner, Riley Thomas Stewart, Jay R. Ferguson, Adam LeFevre, Robert Hayes, Joe Chrest, Russell Durham Comegys, Sharon Morris, Ann McKenzie, Kendal Tuttle, Cameron Banfield, Ritchie Montgomery, Courtney J. Clark, Trey Burvant, Gavin Reyna, Matthew Michaud, Reverend Dustin Bergene, Nedal Yousef, Naim Alherimi, Jillian Batherson, Dorian Davis, Cote Jackson, Douglas M. Griffin, Donna Heckel-Reno, Hunter Reno, Amanda Fetters, Calvin Quatroy, Marcie Antony Courtney, Michael A. Cowan, Deborah Denise Graves, Gary Harris, Melba Marie Harris, Consuella Johnson Lumas, Tina Marie Lumas, Gregory J. Probst, Valerie Diane Vaughn, Mayfield, Zigg West, Sam Knight, Jett, Bailey Celeste Sacco, Bruce Berman, Denise DiNovi, Alison Greenspan, Kerry Heysen, Kevin McCormick, Ravi Mehta, Mark Isham, Hal Lindes, Alar Kivilo, Scott Gray, Ronna Kress, Barbara Ling, Paul Kelly, Kathy Lucas, Dayna Pink, Kimberly Amacker, Bill Daly, Bob Dohrmann, Afnahn Khan, Gerson Paz, Steve Ritzi, David Sardi, Paul Uddo, Pedro Barguin, Richard Bullock, Andy Abele, Robert Baird, Phillip Kimsey, Sam Matthews, John Bissell, Donald Burdett, Christian Agypt, David Allsberry, Mac Alsfeld, Pablo Cardone, Jason Chandler, Zack Earl Edwards, Heather Fielding, Charlie French, Jeff Galpin, Meg Dudley, Bryan Gardiner, Mark Harden, Zachary Holmes, Chris Jones, Christina Killelea, Daryl Lefever, Claire Raskind, Jennifer Ray, Jayne-Ann Tenggren, Lauren Thomas, Lauren Von Huene, Jonathan WarrenThe Lucky One

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

I am lucky.

I am cursed.

My job is to have the most wonderful at a time thing to do than anything.

Pay me?  Don’t have to (just kidding, Kyrle – I love money!)!

Lucky.

Then I am assigned for the watching of “The Lucky One.”

What?

Really?

The vomiting I promised last week was happening.  In the now!

What an insult!

Cursed.

You may in your thoughts think me a little person. Or another, that I am smart.

I am the average.  My only study was for the film.

And so I write on the film.  My job.

But I am sick at heart.

Does anybody care?!?

Hollywood has not smart thinking.  Hit movies are made from luck.  Crap movies can be good (to me, or you).

But “The Lucky One?”  Are you high?

Who will see this shit-fest?

I am really high.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Lucky One, Scott Hicks, Will Fetters, Nicholas Sparks, Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner, Riley Thomas Stewart, Jay R. Ferguson, Adam LeFevre, Robert Hayes, Joe Chrest, Russell Durham Comegys, Sharon Morris, Ann McKenzie, Kendal Tuttle, Cameron Banfield, Ritchie Montgomery, Courtney J. Clark, Trey Burvant, Gavin Reyna, Matthew Michaud, Reverend Dustin Bergene, Nedal Yousef, Naim Alherimi, Jillian Batherson, Dorian Davis, Cote Jackson, Douglas M. Griffin, Donna Heckel-Reno, Hunter Reno, Amanda Fetters, Calvin Quatroy, Marcie Antony Courtney, Michael A. Cowan, Deborah Denise Graves, Gary Harris, Melba Marie Harris, Consuella Johnson Lumas, Tina Marie Lumas, Gregory J. Probst, Valerie Diane Vaughn, Mayfield, Zigg West, Sam Knight, Jett, Bailey Celeste Sacco, Bruce Berman, Denise DiNovi, Alison Greenspan, Kerry Heysen, Kevin McCormick, Ravi Mehta, Mark Isham, Hal Lindes, Alar Kivilo, Scott Gray, Ronna Kress, Barbara Ling, Paul Kelly, Kathy Lucas, Dayna Pink, Kimberly Amacker, Bill Daly, Bob Dohrmann, Afnahn Khan, Gerson Paz, Steve Ritzi, David Sardi, Paul Uddo, Pedro Barguin, Richard Bullock, Andy Abele, Robert Baird, Phillip Kimsey, Sam Matthews, John Bissell, Donald Burdett, Christian Agypt, David Allsberry, Mac Alsfeld, Pablo Cardone, Jason Chandler, Zack Earl Edwards, Heather Fielding, Charlie French, Jeff Galpin, Meg Dudley, Bryan Gardiner, Mark Harden, Zachary Holmes, Chris Jones, Christina Killelea, Daryl Lefever, Claire Raskind, Jennifer Ray, Jayne-Ann Tenggren, Lauren Thomas, Lauren Von Huene, Jonathan WarrenSo instead of talking about “The Lucky One” I want to talk over the 4/20 day!

That’s right!

I really am high.  And I’m so ready for the happening 20th!

In my new Finland (California), the dispensaries are having sales!

I can got from place to place and get the weed that made Californiaa cool place.  Like bar hopping, but if the taps leaked only sticky bud.

Heaven.

So all, tomorrow is for the bonging.  Do not forget that.

So, “The Lucky One” I return – like a dog to his own vomit.

Plot?  I guess.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Lucky One, Scott Hicks, Will Fetters, Nicholas Sparks, Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner, Riley Thomas Stewart, Jay R. Ferguson, Adam LeFevre, Robert Hayes, Joe Chrest, Russell Durham Comegys, Sharon Morris, Ann McKenzie, Kendal Tuttle, Cameron Banfield, Ritchie Montgomery, Courtney J. Clark, Trey Burvant, Gavin Reyna, Matthew Michaud, Reverend Dustin Bergene, Nedal Yousef, Naim Alherimi, Jillian Batherson, Dorian Davis, Cote Jackson, Douglas M. Griffin, Donna Heckel-Reno, Hunter Reno, Amanda Fetters, Calvin Quatroy, Marcie Antony Courtney, Michael A. Cowan, Deborah Denise Graves, Gary Harris, Melba Marie Harris, Consuella Johnson Lumas, Tina Marie Lumas, Gregory J. Probst, Valerie Diane Vaughn, Mayfield, Zigg West, Sam Knight, Jett, Bailey Celeste Sacco, Bruce Berman, Denise DiNovi, Alison Greenspan, Kerry Heysen, Kevin McCormick, Ravi Mehta, Mark Isham, Hal Lindes, Alar Kivilo, Scott Gray, Ronna Kress, Barbara Ling, Paul Kelly, Kathy Lucas, Dayna Pink, Kimberly Amacker, Bill Daly, Bob Dohrmann, Afnahn Khan, Gerson Paz, Steve Ritzi, David Sardi, Paul Uddo, Pedro Barguin, Richard Bullock, Andy Abele, Robert Baird, Phillip Kimsey, Sam Matthews, John Bissell, Donald Burdett, Christian Agypt, David Allsberry, Mac Alsfeld, Pablo Cardone, Jason Chandler, Zack Earl Edwards, Heather Fielding, Charlie French, Jeff Galpin, Meg Dudley, Bryan Gardiner, Mark Harden, Zachary Holmes, Chris Jones, Christina Killelea, Daryl Lefever, Claire Raskind, Jennifer Ray, Jayne-Ann Tenggren, Lauren Thomas, Lauren Von Huene, Jonathan WarrenA Marine travels to North Carolina after serving three tours in Iraq and searches for the unknown woman he believes was his good luck charm during the war.

Thanks, IMDB!

Kyrle, this may be the end on me.

There was a Disney movie that was for Chimpanzees!

And I have to see this crappening?!?  Damn.

But know the this 4/20 Day will be my best first while in the SoCal!

And maybe the week next?  I’ll see a film that give me a happy smile and want my death to wait.

“The Lucky One” fans?  Kiss my brown eye.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

 

The Cabin In The Woods [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Cabin In The Woods, Drew Goddard, Joss Whedon, Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Tim De Zam, Tom Lenk, Dan Payne, Jodelle Ferland, Dan Shea, Maya Massar, Matt Drake, Nels Lennarson, Rukiya Bernard, Peter Kelamis, Adrian Holmes, Chelah Horsdal, Terry Chen, Heather Doerksen, Patrick Sabongul, Phillip Mitchell, Naomi Dane, Ellie Harvie, Patrick Gilmore, Brad Dryborough, Emili Kawashima, Aya Furukawa, Maria Go, Serena Akane Chi, Abbey Imai, Marina Ishibashi, Miku Katsuura, Alicia Takase Lui, Jodi Tabuchi, Sara Taira, Alyssandra Yamamoto, Ricahrd Cetrone, Phoebe Galvan, Simon Pidgeon, Matt Phillips, Lori Stewart, Greg Zach, Sigourney Weaver, Jason Clark, Lucas D. Hill, David Julyan, Peter Deming, Lisa Lassek, Heiki Brandstatter, Anya Colloff, Coreen Mayrs, Amy McIntyre Britt, Martin Whist, Michael Diner, Hamish Purdy, Steve Demko, Mary Anne Waterhouse, Karin Behrenz, Richard Cowan, Gary Hawes, Alysse Leite Rogers, Louisa Phung, Lauro Chartrand, Andrew Chin, Andrea Brown, Todd Fulkerson, Cesare Gagliardoni, Melody Gehman, Rob Grant, Dustin Lee Abram, Paul Becker, Joao Paulo Bertol, Kameron Bodaly, Charlene Callihoo, Kyle Cornell, Jason Crosby, Matt Granger, Kasandra Greene-Griebel, Richa Herbeck, Jill Kabush, Susan Lambie, Heather Langenkamp, Willan Leung, Gemma Levinson, Sandra Matossi, Danny McKenzie, Nathaniel Moher, Terry Notary, Rachel Rhee, Ian Robinson, Jacquelyn Roth, Joecy Shepherd, Nathan Tichenor, Scott Trimble, Crystal Williams, Christa Zofcin

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Cabin In The Woods, Drew Goddard, Joss Whedon, Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Tim De Zam, Tom Lenk, Dan Payne, Jodelle Ferland, Dan Shea, Maya Massar, Matt Drake, Nels Lennarson, Rukiya Bernard, Peter Kelamis, Adrian Holmes, Chelah Horsdal, Terry Chen, Heather Doerksen, Patrick Sabongul, Phillip Mitchell, Naomi Dane, Ellie Harvie, Patrick Gilmore, Brad Dryborough, Emili Kawashima, Aya Furukawa, Maria Go, Serena Akane Chi, Abbey Imai, Marina Ishibashi, Miku Katsuura, Alicia Takase Lui, Jodi Tabuchi, Sara Taira, Alyssandra Yamamoto, Ricahrd Cetrone, Phoebe Galvan, Simon Pidgeon, Matt Phillips, Lori Stewart, Greg Zach, Sigourney Weaver, Jason Clark, Lucas D. Hill, David Julyan, Peter Deming, Lisa Lassek, Heiki Brandstatter, Anya Colloff, Coreen Mayrs, Amy McIntyre Britt, Martin Whist, Michael Diner, Hamish Purdy, Steve Demko, Mary Anne Waterhouse, Karin Behrenz, Richard Cowan, Gary Hawes, Alysse Leite Rogers, Louisa Phung, Lauro Chartrand, Andrew Chin, Andrea Brown, Todd Fulkerson, Cesare Gagliardoni, Melody Gehman, Rob Grant, Dustin Lee Abram, Paul Becker, Joao Paulo Bertol, Kameron Bodaly, Charlene Callihoo, Kyle Cornell, Jason Crosby, Matt Granger, Kasandra Greene-Griebel, Richa Herbeck, Jill Kabush, Susan Lambie, Heather Langenkamp, Willan Leung, Gemma Levinson, Sandra Matossi, Danny McKenzie, Nathaniel Moher, Terry Notary, Rachel Rhee, Ian Robinson, Jacquelyn Roth, Joecy Shepherd, Nathan Tichenor, Scott Trimble, Crystal Williams, Christa ZofcinThe Cabin In The Woods

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

“Previews.”

“Trailers” (as in the industry the name is whispered).

“Coming Attractions” to the elderly who are always cold and cry at the loudness of noise (and smell like liver sausage, if lucky).

No matter the calling of the things, they are evil.

Ruining movies is the job of them.

Show every damn good thing to see in 2 minutes 30 seconds.

Just like “The Cabin In The Woods”, right?

No!

The opposite of right!

A horror movie that was totally whack (get it?)!  People over 30 – that means it was good, in Finland.

Plot?

Who cares!

In the woods go the nubile teenagers.

Creepy local dude.

Pot (not mine – kossu shots only this night, right Kyrle?).  Oh, with guys at Mission Control…MISSION CONTROL?!?!?!?  WTF?!?!?!?

Then nudity.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Cabin In The Woods, Drew Goddard, Joss Whedon, Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Tim De Zam, Tom Lenk, Dan Payne, Jodelle Ferland, Dan Shea, Maya Massar, Matt Drake, Nels Lennarson, Rukiya Bernard, Peter Kelamis, Adrian Holmes, Chelah Horsdal, Terry Chen, Heather Doerksen, Patrick Sabongul, Phillip Mitchell, Naomi Dane, Ellie Harvie, Patrick Gilmore, Brad Dryborough, Emili Kawashima, Aya Furukawa, Maria Go, Serena Akane Chi, Abbey Imai, Marina Ishibashi, Miku Katsuura, Alicia Takase Lui, Jodi Tabuchi, Sara Taira, Alyssandra Yamamoto, Ricahrd Cetrone, Phoebe Galvan, Simon Pidgeon, Matt Phillips, Lori Stewart, Greg Zach, Sigourney Weaver, Jason Clark, Lucas D. Hill, David Julyan, Peter Deming, Lisa Lassek, Heiki Brandstatter, Anya Colloff, Coreen Mayrs, Amy McIntyre Britt, Martin Whist, Michael Diner, Hamish Purdy, Steve Demko, Mary Anne Waterhouse, Karin Behrenz, Richard Cowan, Gary Hawes, Alysse Leite Rogers, Louisa Phung, Lauro Chartrand, Andrew Chin, Andrea Brown, Todd Fulkerson, Cesare Gagliardoni, Melody Gehman, Rob Grant, Dustin Lee Abram, Paul Becker, Joao Paulo Bertol, Kameron Bodaly, Charlene Callihoo, Kyle Cornell, Jason Crosby, Matt Granger, Kasandra Greene-Griebel, Richa Herbeck, Jill Kabush, Susan Lambie, Heather Langenkamp, Willan Leung, Gemma Levinson, Sandra Matossi, Danny McKenzie, Nathaniel Moher, Terry Notary, Rachel Rhee, Ian Robinson, Jacquelyn Roth, Joecy Shepherd, Nathan Tichenor, Scott Trimble, Crystal Williams, Christa ZofcinCrazy crap happens.

Death of people.

Boobs.

Funny jokes.

More pot.

Cellar that should below Rob Zombie’s house live.

And real zombies.  This is the shit.  Truly.

How can I blather without spoilers?  Cannot happen.

So this.  This acting rules the world of acting.

Any film of horror with Richard Jenkins (he was awesome in “Let Vampires In Your House”) must be eye balled.

Teamed him with Bradley Whitford?  Best horror ever.

The boobs of Anna Hutchison?  If there was Boob Acting award she just won two (or does the pair count as one?  My mind reels.).  Especially with her tonguing of the ex-wolf.

Lucky ex-wolf.

Thor (Chris Hemsworth) should be allowed to live (until stinking pile “The Avengers” is released – then the fatwa is back in force).

Then arrives the Kimmo alter-ego, played by Fran Kranz.  He smokes the pot almost with as much puffing as me.  Clouds were created.  Warping of minds – and a bong that made me smile.

My respect is his.  And my jealousy.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Cabin In The Woods, Drew Goddard, Joss Whedon, Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Tim De Zam, Tom Lenk, Dan Payne, Jodelle Ferland, Dan Shea, Maya Massar, Matt Drake, Nels Lennarson, Rukiya Bernard, Peter Kelamis, Adrian Holmes, Chelah Horsdal, Terry Chen, Heather Doerksen, Patrick Sabongul, Phillip Mitchell, Naomi Dane, Ellie Harvie, Patrick Gilmore, Brad Dryborough, Emili Kawashima, Aya Furukawa, Maria Go, Serena Akane Chi, Abbey Imai, Marina Ishibashi, Miku Katsuura, Alicia Takase Lui, Jodi Tabuchi, Sara Taira, Alyssandra Yamamoto, Ricahrd Cetrone, Phoebe Galvan, Simon Pidgeon, Matt Phillips, Lori Stewart, Greg Zach, Sigourney Weaver, Jason Clark, Lucas D. Hill, David Julyan, Peter Deming, Lisa Lassek, Heiki Brandstatter, Anya Colloff, Coreen Mayrs, Amy McIntyre Britt, Martin Whist, Michael Diner, Hamish Purdy, Steve Demko, Mary Anne Waterhouse, Karin Behrenz, Richard Cowan, Gary Hawes, Alysse Leite Rogers, Louisa Phung, Lauro Chartrand, Andrew Chin, Andrea Brown, Todd Fulkerson, Cesare Gagliardoni, Melody Gehman, Rob Grant, Dustin Lee Abram, Paul Becker, Joao Paulo Bertol, Kameron Bodaly, Charlene Callihoo, Kyle Cornell, Jason Crosby, Matt Granger, Kasandra Greene-Griebel, Richa Herbeck, Jill Kabush, Susan Lambie, Heather Langenkamp, Willan Leung, Gemma Levinson, Sandra Matossi, Danny McKenzie, Nathaniel Moher, Terry Notary, Rachel Rhee, Ian Robinson, Jacquelyn Roth, Joecy Shepherd, Nathan Tichenor, Scott Trimble, Crystal Williams, Christa ZofcinFinally, there is the hot, hot, hot Kristen Connolly (if by hot in English means “looks weird but I still got a boner”).  She would be worthy of a date by a warrior-blood filled man… me.

I would ask, “Do you have any Finn in you?”  “No” she says.  Then I would say, “Would you like some?”

I laugh at my joke!  Works every time (except for the times of failure).

Side note:  Japanese couple who must buy entire snack bar to watch a movie – divide the fucking food up before you enter the theater.  Then your gaping mouth holes don’t have to flap and flap and flap, pissing off all the people in the ten foot hearing area of your grating voices.  If the Norse Gods would have had a say you would now be below Midgard and being in Hel tortured.  Kind of like the movie you could not stay silent in and watch (jerk-offs!).  I hate you (not all Japanese, just in theater talking Japanese assholes).

I feel better.

So… two thumbs sticking up as hard as my little Kimmo seeing the young doomed boobs.

M. Night Shamalyanyaynan (whatever) needs to see “The Cabin In The Woods” to know how to blow minds.  The trailer tried to screw my fun place but there was more to be seen.

Ha, Hollywood!  You have been defeated!

Until I have to sit though “The Lucky One” – my vomiting will be your victory.

Damn.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  I am in great love with “Game of Thrones.”  Manly love.  Question – if you could be as smart as The Imp and drink wine like a wine drinking fish and get to sex up large boob-ed prostitute women (without the falling off of your dick), would you still be okay with life as a dwarf?  Kimmo would!  Please answer in comments below!

 

American Reunion [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, American Reunion, American Pie, Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, Adam Herz, Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Mena Suvari, Eddie Kaye Thomas, John Cho, Jennifer Coolidge, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Dania Ramirez, Katrina Bowden, Jay Harrington, Chuck Hittinger, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Owen, Justin Isfeld, Charlene Amoia, Jesse Malinowski, Robert Hayes, Vik Sahay, Stevie Ray Dallimore, Kim Wall, Neil Patrick Harris, George Christopher Bianchi, Jennifer Sun Bell, Autumn Dial, Rebecca Field, Vince Pisani, Terri James, Jen Kober, Raheem Babalola, Valarie Kobrovsky, Benjamin Arthur, Hart Turner, Molly Cheek, Brian Mahoney, Chad Johnson, Matt Mangum, Zane Wind, Helena Santos Lew, Michael Beasley, Pam Green, Joseph Kaiser, Michael May, Logan Van Sickle, Chase Krepp, Max Wissinger, John Bailey, Elizabeth Shea Hurwitz, Rod rich, Jenna Willis, Ali Cobrin, Louis G. Friedman, Adam Herz, Chris Moore, Craig Perry, Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz, Warren Zide, Lyle Workman, Daryn Okada, Jeff Betancourt, Jay Scully, William Arnold, Elliott Glick, David Smith, Mona May, Kathleen Keller, Steve Apicella, Bill Barnes, Steve Adcock, jamie Lynn Catrett, Julian Andraus, Allyse Manoff, Tom Hardisty, Joseph Amaral, Paul Bednarz, Stephanie Beman, Justin Campbell, Stephen Cook, Michelle Coppins, Luke Crawford, Anthony Davis, Wes Dorough, Lea Enslin, Katie Ferguson, Pam Fuller, Ari Joseph, Kathleen Keller, Andrew Kim, Wendi Laski, Heidi Brook Myers, Wendy Price, Sommer Oliver, Brent Ogburn, Joshua Reid-Davis, Bruce Robert, Drew Ritson, Liz Smallwood, Robin Spears, Michael Swafford, Melanie Tolbert, Natalie Tyler, Christoph Vogt

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, American Reunion, American Pie, Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, Adam Herz, Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Mena Suvari, Eddie Kaye Thomas, John Cho, Jennifer Coolidge, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Dania Ramirez, Katrina Bowden, Jay Harrington, Chuck Hittinger, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Owen, Justin Isfeld, Charlene Amoia, Jesse Malinowski, Robert Hayes, Vik Sahay, Stevie Ray Dallimore, Kim Wall, Neil Patrick Harris, George Christopher Bianchi, Jennifer Sun Bell, Autumn Dial, Rebecca Field, Vince Pisani, Terri James, Jen Kober, Raheem Babalola, Valarie Kobrovsky, Benjamin Arthur, Hart Turner, Molly Cheek, Brian Mahoney, Chad Johnson, Matt Mangum, Zane Wind, Helena Santos Lew, Michael Beasley, Pam Green, Joseph Kaiser, Michael May, Logan Van Sickle, Chase Krepp, Max Wissinger, John Bailey, Elizabeth Shea Hurwitz, Rod rich, Jenna Willis, Ali Cobrin, Louis G. Friedman, Adam Herz, Chris Moore, Craig Perry, Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz, Warren Zide, Lyle Workman, Daryn Okada, Jeff Betancourt, Jay Scully, William Arnold, Elliott Glick, David Smith, Mona May, Kathleen Keller, Steve Apicella, Bill Barnes, Steve Adcock, jamie Lynn Catrett, Julian Andraus, Allyse Manoff, Tom Hardisty, Joseph Amaral, Paul Bednarz, Stephanie Beman, Justin Campbell, Stephen Cook, Michelle Coppins, Luke Crawford, Anthony Davis, Wes Dorough, Lea Enslin, Katie Ferguson, Pam Fuller, Ari Joseph, Kathleen Keller, Andrew Kim, Wendi Laski, Heidi Brook Myers, Wendy Price, Sommer Oliver, Brent Ogburn, Joshua Reid-Davis, Bruce Robert, Drew Ritson, Liz Smallwood, Robin Spears, Michael Swafford, Melanie Tolbert, Natalie Tyler, Christoph VogtAmerican Reunion

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Kimmo was in trouble.

Big trouble.

Last week I had super cool “Wrath of the Titans” review that I made.

Then the dumbness strikes.

I e-mail copy of review to my Uncle Tukka who is in living outside of the Helsinki – not to Kyrle, who is the editor that manages these things.

I have screwed Straight Up (like Paula Abdul!).  Kyrle has made a rule that is new:  Kossu shots OR bong loads, not Kossu shots AND bong loads.

This is fair, in my heart and in my head thoughts.  I know that booze is good.  So is the sweet, sweet smoke.

Together?  I begin to be a Greeter Man at WalMart.

Sorry to my 15 loyal readers.  I feel shame.

Now – for a movie!

And what a goddamn good time for a movie to have!  I was very worrisome.

Every time Hollywood touches my past it is “the wrong touch.”

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, American Reunion, American Pie, Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, Adam Herz, Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Mena Suvari, Eddie Kaye Thomas, John Cho, Jennifer Coolidge, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Dania Ramirez, Katrina Bowden, Jay Harrington, Chuck Hittinger, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Owen, Justin Isfeld, Charlene Amoia, Jesse Malinowski, Robert Hayes, Vik Sahay, Stevie Ray Dallimore, Kim Wall, Neil Patrick Harris, George Christopher Bianchi, Jennifer Sun Bell, Autumn Dial, Rebecca Field, Vince Pisani, Terri James, Jen Kober, Raheem Babalola, Valarie Kobrovsky, Benjamin Arthur, Hart Turner, Molly Cheek, Brian Mahoney, Chad Johnson, Matt Mangum, Zane Wind, Helena Santos Lew, Michael Beasley, Pam Green, Joseph Kaiser, Michael May, Logan Van Sickle, Chase Krepp, Max Wissinger, John Bailey, Elizabeth Shea Hurwitz, Rod rich, Jenna Willis, Ali Cobrin, Louis G. Friedman, Adam Herz, Chris Moore, Craig Perry, Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz, Warren Zide, Lyle Workman, Daryn Okada, Jeff Betancourt, Jay Scully, William Arnold, Elliott Glick, David Smith, Mona May, Kathleen Keller, Steve Apicella, Bill Barnes, Steve Adcock, jamie Lynn Catrett, Julian Andraus, Allyse Manoff, Tom Hardisty, Joseph Amaral, Paul Bednarz, Stephanie Beman, Justin Campbell, Stephen Cook, Michelle Coppins, Luke Crawford, Anthony Davis, Wes Dorough, Lea Enslin, Katie Ferguson, Pam Fuller, Ari Joseph, Kathleen Keller, Andrew Kim, Wendi Laski, Heidi Brook Myers, Wendy Price, Sommer Oliver, Brent Ogburn, Joshua Reid-Davis, Bruce Robert, Drew Ritson, Liz Smallwood, Robin Spears, Michael Swafford, Melanie Tolbert, Natalie Tyler, Christoph VogtBut “American Reunion?”  I am sporting a Stifler!

Really.  I am not kidding.

Plot?  Sure!

All of our “American Pie” friends come back – 13 year reunions are important in America.

So, like locusts on Egypt they return.  Jim (Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) are married with kid attached.  Oz (Chris Klein) works at crap ESPN channel.  Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas) is worldly in many ways.  Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas) is whipped by Gossip Girls.  Stifler (Seann William Scott) is… you will see as moments come by.

All are older, some are bigger in the wise area, some are better now as people than as high school students.

We see a penis.

Craps are taken in places where craps have never been before (so I hope).

Chicks that were once to be sat on as babies are now so hot for drooling.

Lies are lied.

Love is kindled (from the past) then rekindled – like fire!

Life is tested… some pass, others think they are taking another test (true story – remember old joke about Norwegian who stayed up all night studying for his urine test?  NEVER GETS OLD!!!).

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, American Reunion, American Pie, Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, Adam Herz, Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Mena Suvari, Eddie Kaye Thomas, John Cho, Jennifer Coolidge, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Dania Ramirez, Katrina Bowden, Jay Harrington, Chuck Hittinger, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Owen, Justin Isfeld, Charlene Amoia, Jesse Malinowski, Robert Hayes, Vik Sahay, Stevie Ray Dallimore, Kim Wall, Neil Patrick Harris, George Christopher Bianchi, Jennifer Sun Bell, Autumn Dial, Rebecca Field, Vince Pisani, Terri James, Jen Kober, Raheem Babalola, Valarie Kobrovsky, Benjamin Arthur, Hart Turner, Molly Cheek, Brian Mahoney, Chad Johnson, Matt Mangum, Zane Wind, Helena Santos Lew, Michael Beasley, Pam Green, Joseph Kaiser, Michael May, Logan Van Sickle, Chase Krepp, Max Wissinger, John Bailey, Elizabeth Shea Hurwitz, Rod rich, Jenna Willis, Ali Cobrin, Louis G. Friedman, Adam Herz, Chris Moore, Craig Perry, Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz, Warren Zide, Lyle Workman, Daryn Okada, Jeff Betancourt, Jay Scully, William Arnold, Elliott Glick, David Smith, Mona May, Kathleen Keller, Steve Apicella, Bill Barnes, Steve Adcock, jamie Lynn Catrett, Julian Andraus, Allyse Manoff, Tom Hardisty, Joseph Amaral, Paul Bednarz, Stephanie Beman, Justin Campbell, Stephen Cook, Michelle Coppins, Luke Crawford, Anthony Davis, Wes Dorough, Lea Enslin, Katie Ferguson, Pam Fuller, Ari Joseph, Kathleen Keller, Andrew Kim, Wendi Laski, Heidi Brook Myers, Wendy Price, Sommer Oliver, Brent Ogburn, Joshua Reid-Davis, Bruce Robert, Drew Ritson, Liz Smallwood, Robin Spears, Michael Swafford, Melanie Tolbert, Natalie Tyler, Christoph VogtMany happy faces from the past float on the screen.  We (I) smile.

I missed my “American Franchise” friends.

But sometimes, expectations are face rubbed in gravel.

The surprise that surprised me was too surprising.  This is a movie about a Stifler.

I will now, out of my mouth (computer mouth) say – “Seann William Scott is the most funny comic actor of the last 20 years.”  His eyeballs tell stories.

He makes sounds that my heart go a kind of “chugga-chugga”, in that straight “chugga-chugga” way. He is the man (boy) that my aspirations were looking at when I was the young.

Now he is complete.  I feel, now, to be complete, too.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, American Reunion, American Pie, Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, Adam Herz, Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Tara Reid, Seann William Scott, Mena Suvari, Eddie Kaye Thomas, John Cho, Jennifer Coolidge, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Dania Ramirez, Katrina Bowden, Jay Harrington, Chuck Hittinger, Shannon Elizabeth, Chris Owen, Justin Isfeld, Charlene Amoia, Jesse Malinowski, Robert Hayes, Vik Sahay, Stevie Ray Dallimore, Kim Wall, Neil Patrick Harris, George Christopher Bianchi, Jennifer Sun Bell, Autumn Dial, Rebecca Field, Vince Pisani, Terri James, Jen Kober, Raheem Babalola, Valarie Kobrovsky, Benjamin Arthur, Hart Turner, Molly Cheek, Brian Mahoney, Chad Johnson, Matt Mangum, Zane Wind, Helena Santos Lew, Michael Beasley, Pam Green, Joseph Kaiser, Michael May, Logan Van Sickle, Chase Krepp, Max Wissinger, John Bailey, Elizabeth Shea Hurwitz, Rod rich, Jenna Willis, Ali Cobrin, Louis G. Friedman, Adam Herz, Chris Moore, Craig Perry, Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz, Warren Zide, Lyle Workman, Daryn Okada, Jeff Betancourt, Jay Scully, William Arnold, Elliott Glick, David Smith, Mona May, Kathleen Keller, Steve Apicella, Bill Barnes, Steve Adcock, jamie Lynn Catrett, Julian Andraus, Allyse Manoff, Tom Hardisty, Joseph Amaral, Paul Bednarz, Stephanie Beman, Justin Campbell, Stephen Cook, Michelle Coppins, Luke Crawford, Anthony Davis, Wes Dorough, Lea Enslin, Katie Ferguson, Pam Fuller, Ari Joseph, Kathleen Keller, Andrew Kim, Wendi Laski, Heidi Brook Myers, Wendy Price, Sommer Oliver, Brent Ogburn, Joshua Reid-Davis, Bruce Robert, Drew Ritson, Liz Smallwood, Robin Spears, Michael Swafford, Melanie Tolbert, Natalie Tyler, Christoph VogtJim’s father (Eugene Levy) deserves some kind of outing.  He, now widowed, is still the father we wanted (without the Pie fucking advice – that was a metaphor anyhow – Jim was kind of a dumbness).

Stifler’s Mom (Jennifer Coolidge) has many more lines (on face and on script).

She must still be done.  And done again.

Vicky (Tara Reid) is now a zombie – but hotter than any zombie on “The Walking Dead”.  It was good to see her.  But not for too long.

And Heather (Mena Suvari) has learned to cover her forehead (or 8-head, if we’re going by the thing’s size) with bangs.  She is now to be whacked to – in a pinch.

So, two thumbs straining to heaven – which is warm pie!

I am in love with “American Reunion.”  Laughs were barked out of my mouth and Dr. Pepper flew through my nose and on the critic to my front place (sorry, Peter Travers).

But never in the life that I live would I thought that I would be in Stifler love.

And I am.  Like an American!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “American Idol” is the suck.  I will now only watch “The Voice”.  Or anything.  Please comment on things that I may watch without Kosso AND bong loads.  In advance – thank you!!!

The Hunger Games [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Hunger Games, Gary Ross, Suzaznne Collins, Billy Ray, Stanley Tucci, Wes Bentley, Jennifer Lawrence, Willow Shields, Liam Hemsworth, Elizabeth Banks, Sandra Ellis Lafferty, Paula Malcomson, Rhoda Griffis, Sandino Moya, Josh Hutcherson, Raiko Bowman, Dwayne Boyd, Anthony Reynolds, Judd Lomand, Woody Harrelson, Toby Jones, Kimiko Gelman, Nelson Ascencio, Brooke Bundy, Lenny Kravitz, Amandla Stenberg, Dayo Okeniyi, Leven Rambin, Jack Quaid, Latarsha Rose, Donald Sutherland, Alexander Ludwig, Isabelle Fuhman, Ian Nelson, Kalia Prescott, Ethan Jamieson, Jacqueline Emerson, Mackenzie Lintz, Annie Thurman, Dakota Hood, Amber Chaney, Karan Kendrick, Shane Biseell, Katie Kneeland, Steve Coulter, Sharon Morris, Tim Taylor, John Ross, Phillip Troy Linger, Robin Bissell, Chantal Feghali, Nina Jacobson, Jon Kilik, Aldric La'auli Porter, Louise Rosner, Bryan Unkeless, T-Bone Burnett, James Newton Howard, Tom Stern, Stephen Mirrione, Juliette Weifling, Debra Zane, Phillip Messina, John Collins, Robert Fechtman, Paul Richards, Larry Dias, Judianna Makovsky, Diana Acrey, Nicole Alkire, Douglas Dresser, Curtis Miller, Louise Rosner, Donna Sloan, Ryan Bennett, Brian Avery Galligan, Casey Mako, John Nasraway, Patrick Priest, Peter Rodger, John Saunders, Steven Soderbergh, Chad Stahelski, Brian Baker, Melissa Harrison, Julie Altus, Shane Hayes, Glynna Grimala, Greg Crawford, nancy MacLeod, Chris Navarro, Margit Pfeiffer, Steve Cremin, Mark Story, Yinai Sun, Wilson Tang, Mauricio Valderrama, John Van Der Zalm, Scott Cosgrove, John Gilbert, Daniel Graham, Allan Poppleton, Jade Quon, Tim Smith, Maurice McGuire, Dino Athanassiou, Eric Bates, Nathan Jones, Anthony Rizzo, Hannah Boyce, Kellyl Doty, Michael Hatzer, Chris Jensen, Richard Molina, Jeff Atmaijian, Allyson Abernethy, W. Aeric Adams, Tara Ansley, David Atkinson, Susan Boyajian, Joe Camp, Don Calhoun, Greg Capoccia, Casey Carmichael, Justine Ciarrocchi, Dan Clark, Christina Coffman, Ami Cohen, Chelsea Craig, Andrea Crampe, Catie Cullari, Michele Cusick, Sarah Duryea, LaCourtney Garrett, Dawn Gillian, Lindsay Gores, Megan Graham, Drew Grant, Tara Grey, Anthony Hanna, April Janow, Craig Koenekoop, Caroline Livengood, Rose Luther, Doug Mackenzie, Michael McKay, Eric Mitro, Jon Neill, Ryan Price, Alan Searcy, jack Stecher, Aaron Lee Syrett, Birdie Talanca, James Edward Tilden, Jesse Tyler, Ben White, Joshua Williams, Melissa Wooten, Melissa Ziegler, Richard Bellina, Peter Rodger

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Hunger Games, Gary Ross, Suzaznne Collins, Billy Ray, Stanley Tucci, Wes Bentley, Jennifer Lawrence, Willow Shields, Liam Hemsworth, Elizabeth Banks, Sandra Ellis Lafferty, Paula Malcomson, Rhoda Griffis, Sandino Moya, Josh Hutcherson, Raiko Bowman, Dwayne Boyd, Anthony Reynolds, Judd Lomand, Woody Harrelson, Toby Jones, Kimiko Gelman, Nelson Ascencio, Brooke Bundy, Lenny Kravitz, Amandla Stenberg, Dayo Okeniyi, Leven Rambin, Jack Quaid, Latarsha Rose, Donald Sutherland, Alexander Ludwig, Isabelle Fuhman, Ian Nelson, Kalia Prescott, Ethan Jamieson, Jacqueline Emerson, Mackenzie Lintz, Annie Thurman, Dakota Hood, Amber Chaney, Karan Kendrick, Shane Biseell, Katie Kneeland, Steve Coulter, Sharon Morris, Tim Taylor, John Ross, Phillip Troy Linger, Robin Bissell, Chantal Feghali, Nina Jacobson, Jon Kilik, Aldric La'auli Porter, Louise Rosner, Bryan Unkeless, T-Bone Burnett, James Newton Howard, Tom Stern, Stephen Mirrione, Juliette Weifling, Debra Zane, Phillip Messina, John Collins, Robert Fechtman, Paul Richards, Larry Dias, Judianna Makovsky, Diana Acrey, Nicole Alkire, Douglas Dresser, Curtis Miller, Louise Rosner, Donna Sloan, Ryan Bennett, Brian Avery Galligan, Casey Mako, John Nasraway, Patrick Priest, Peter Rodger, John Saunders, Steven Soderbergh, Chad Stahelski, Brian Baker, Melissa Harrison, Julie Altus, Shane Hayes, Glynna Grimala, Greg Crawford, nancy MacLeod, Chris Navarro, Margit Pfeiffer, Steve Cremin, Mark Story, Yinai Sun, Wilson Tang, Mauricio Valderrama, John Van Der Zalm, Scott Cosgrove, John Gilbert, Daniel Graham, Allan Poppleton, Jade Quon, Tim Smith, Maurice McGuire, Dino Athanassiou, Eric Bates, Nathan Jones, Anthony Rizzo, Hannah Boyce, Kellyl Doty, Michael Hatzer, Chris Jensen, Richard Molina, Jeff Atmaijian, Allyson Abernethy, W. Aeric Adams, Tara Ansley, David Atkinson, Susan Boyajian, Joe Camp, Don Calhoun, Greg Capoccia, Casey Carmichael, Justine Ciarrocchi, Dan Clark, Christina Coffman, Ami Cohen, Chelsea Craig, Andrea Crampe, Catie Cullari, Michele Cusick, Sarah Duryea, LaCourtney Garrett, Dawn Gillian, Lindsay Gores, Megan Graham, Drew Grant, Tara Grey, Anthony Hanna, April Janow, Craig Koenekoop, Caroline Livengood, Rose Luther, Doug Mackenzie, Michael McKay, Eric Mitro, Jon Neill, Ryan Price, Alan Searcy, jack Stecher, Aaron Lee Syrett, Birdie Talanca, James Edward Tilden, Jesse Tyler, Ben White, Joshua Williams, Melissa Wooten, Melissa Ziegler, Richard Bellina, Peter RodgerThe Hunger Games

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

I have waited for this longer than time may seem to you.

Or even longer.

So when the cinema doors opened I was fully ready for an eyeball party!

Yes, “The Hunger Games” is finally open.

Smoke was smoked.

Popcorn was popped.

Kossu was in the fun pocket for in the theater for drinking.

Yes!

Then my confusion – is this about Finland?  Dirt.  Trees.  Poor people.  District 12 is Finland!

Then my panic pulls out (too much weed) and I realize that I’m in the right film theater.

First things right now:  Jennifer Lawrence is hot.  So hot that I have a Winter’s Bone in the springtime.

Movie critic humor (for the win)!

So, what did we see?  Plot is now!

The story of The Hunger Games” is set in an indeterminate future.  North America is destroyed.  From the ashes rose the country Panem, which consisted of the Capital and original 13 districts.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Hunger Games, Gary Ross, Suzaznne Collins, Billy Ray, Stanley Tucci, Wes Bentley, Jennifer Lawrence, Willow Shields, Liam Hemsworth, Elizabeth Banks, Sandra Ellis Lafferty, Paula Malcomson, Rhoda Griffis, Sandino Moya, Josh Hutcherson, Raiko Bowman, Dwayne Boyd, Anthony Reynolds, Judd Lomand, Woody Harrelson, Toby Jones, Kimiko Gelman, Nelson Ascencio, Brooke Bundy, Lenny Kravitz, Amandla Stenberg, Dayo Okeniyi, Leven Rambin, Jack Quaid, Latarsha Rose, Donald Sutherland, Alexander Ludwig, Isabelle Fuhman, Ian Nelson, Kalia Prescott, Ethan Jamieson, Jacqueline Emerson, Mackenzie Lintz, Annie Thurman, Dakota Hood, Amber Chaney, Karan Kendrick, Shane Biseell, Katie Kneeland, Steve Coulter, Sharon Morris, Tim Taylor, John Ross, Phillip Troy Linger, Robin Bissell, Chantal Feghali, Nina Jacobson, Jon Kilik, Aldric La'auli Porter, Louise Rosner, Bryan Unkeless, T-Bone Burnett, James Newton Howard, Tom Stern, Stephen Mirrione, Juliette Weifling, Debra Zane, Phillip Messina, John Collins, Robert Fechtman, Paul Richards, Larry Dias, Judianna Makovsky, Diana Acrey, Nicole Alkire, Douglas Dresser, Curtis Miller, Louise Rosner, Donna Sloan, Ryan Bennett, Brian Avery Galligan, Casey Mako, John Nasraway, Patrick Priest, Peter Rodger, John Saunders, Steven Soderbergh, Chad Stahelski, Brian Baker, Melissa Harrison, Julie Altus, Shane Hayes, Glynna Grimala, Greg Crawford, nancy MacLeod, Chris Navarro, Margit Pfeiffer, Steve Cremin, Mark Story, Yinai Sun, Wilson Tang, Mauricio Valderrama, John Van Der Zalm, Scott Cosgrove, John Gilbert, Daniel Graham, Allan Poppleton, Jade Quon, Tim Smith, Maurice McGuire, Dino Athanassiou, Eric Bates, Nathan Jones, Anthony Rizzo, Hannah Boyce, Kellyl Doty, Michael Hatzer, Chris Jensen, Richard Molina, Jeff Atmaijian, Allyson Abernethy, W. Aeric Adams, Tara Ansley, David Atkinson, Susan Boyajian, Joe Camp, Don Calhoun, Greg Capoccia, Casey Carmichael, Justine Ciarrocchi, Dan Clark, Christina Coffman, Ami Cohen, Chelsea Craig, Andrea Crampe, Catie Cullari, Michele Cusick, Sarah Duryea, LaCourtney Garrett, Dawn Gillian, Lindsay Gores, Megan Graham, Drew Grant, Tara Grey, Anthony Hanna, April Janow, Craig Koenekoop, Caroline Livengood, Rose Luther, Doug Mackenzie, Michael McKay, Eric Mitro, Jon Neill, Ryan Price, Alan Searcy, jack Stecher, Aaron Lee Syrett, Birdie Talanca, James Edward Tilden, Jesse Tyler, Ben White, Joshua Williams, Melissa Wooten, Melissa Ziegler, Richard Bellina, Peter RodgerAfter an uprising a district was destroyed.  In order to remember the debt of the districts, Capitol held once a year the so-called Hunger Games, in which 24 young people compete in a battle to the death against each other – in each district a girl and a boy.

In the 74th Hunger Games something unexpected happens: This part is that her younger sister Prim (Willow Shields) to the Hunger Games must be reported, the 16-year-old Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) volunteers as a tribute.

This is the greatest movie that has ever been told.

The cool, cool book was cool – but the cinema book is even more cooler.  Because it is not read, but seen with my (your) own eyes!

Reading is the suck.  Except for my reviews.

First (since she is the lead and smoking hot) Jennifer Lawrence is to win every award of acting.  Only her “overly large for a starving girl” boobs were a distraction.

Sometimes it is good to be distracted.

Woody Harrelson as the drunken Haymitch reminds me of me when the Kossu flows and I become the state of drunk.

As the badass leader, Donald Sutherland is old and must like mothballs and kidney medication smell – because he is old.  The boys gave me jealousy for their nearness to Katniss.

Gale (Liam Hemsworth – why is a 30 year old up for the 12-18 year old Reaping?  He is older than Haymitch.  Weird.) and Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) both have inner stiffies for Katniss, but only Peeta gets too close for my comfort.  And yours.  She is mine.

Other actors were also good to acting:  Elizabeth Banks, Lenny Kravitz, Stanley Tucci, Wes Bentley (excellent face beard!), all greatness.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Hunger Games, Gary Ross, Suzaznne Collins, Billy Ray, Stanley Tucci, Wes Bentley, Jennifer Lawrence, Willow Shields, Liam Hemsworth, Elizabeth Banks, Sandra Ellis Lafferty, Paula Malcomson, Rhoda Griffis, Sandino Moya, Josh Hutcherson, Raiko Bowman, Dwayne Boyd, Anthony Reynolds, Judd Lomand, Woody Harrelson, Toby Jones, Kimiko Gelman, Nelson Ascencio, Brooke Bundy, Lenny Kravitz, Amandla Stenberg, Dayo Okeniyi, Leven Rambin, Jack Quaid, Latarsha Rose, Donald Sutherland, Alexander Ludwig, Isabelle Fuhman, Ian Nelson, Kalia Prescott, Ethan Jamieson, Jacqueline Emerson, Mackenzie Lintz, Annie Thurman, Dakota Hood, Amber Chaney, Karan Kendrick, Shane Biseell, Katie Kneeland, Steve Coulter, Sharon Morris, Tim Taylor, John Ross, Phillip Troy Linger, Robin Bissell, Chantal Feghali, Nina Jacobson, Jon Kilik, Aldric La'auli Porter, Louise Rosner, Bryan Unkeless, T-Bone Burnett, James Newton Howard, Tom Stern, Stephen Mirrione, Juliette Weifling, Debra Zane, Phillip Messina, John Collins, Robert Fechtman, Paul Richards, Larry Dias, Judianna Makovsky, Diana Acrey, Nicole Alkire, Douglas Dresser, Curtis Miller, Louise Rosner, Donna Sloan, Ryan Bennett, Brian Avery Galligan, Casey Mako, John Nasraway, Patrick Priest, Peter Rodger, John Saunders, Steven Soderbergh, Chad Stahelski, Brian Baker, Melissa Harrison, Julie Altus, Shane Hayes, Glynna Grimala, Greg Crawford, nancy MacLeod, Chris Navarro, Margit Pfeiffer, Steve Cremin, Mark Story, Yinai Sun, Wilson Tang, Mauricio Valderrama, John Van Der Zalm, Scott Cosgrove, John Gilbert, Daniel Graham, Allan Poppleton, Jade Quon, Tim Smith, Maurice McGuire, Dino Athanassiou, Eric Bates, Nathan Jones, Anthony Rizzo, Hannah Boyce, Kellyl Doty, Michael Hatzer, Chris Jensen, Richard Molina, Jeff Atmaijian, Allyson Abernethy, W. Aeric Adams, Tara Ansley, David Atkinson, Susan Boyajian, Joe Camp, Don Calhoun, Greg Capoccia, Casey Carmichael, Justine Ciarrocchi, Dan Clark, Christina Coffman, Ami Cohen, Chelsea Craig, Andrea Crampe, Catie Cullari, Michele Cusick, Sarah Duryea, LaCourtney Garrett, Dawn Gillian, Lindsay Gores, Megan Graham, Drew Grant, Tara Grey, Anthony Hanna, April Janow, Craig Koenekoop, Caroline Livengood, Rose Luther, Doug Mackenzie, Michael McKay, Eric Mitro, Jon Neill, Ryan Price, Alan Searcy, jack Stecher, Aaron Lee Syrett, Birdie Talanca, James Edward Tilden, Jesse Tyler, Ben White, Joshua Williams, Melissa Wooten, Melissa Ziegler, Richard Bellina, Peter RodgerThe directing Director – Gary Ross – was also the shit.

Battle scenes were with less blood flowing than the book, but more real blood than that “Twilight” crap that was smeared on my brain last year.

Hoping for the R rated directors cut on Blu-ray with many limbs cut to pieces.

Now, just wait on Hollywood with no originality or even an idea.  Remake of “The Hunger.”  Another movie of “Aqua Teen Hunger Force.”  Movie from board game “Hungry Hungry Hippos.”

For now, just go see “The Hunger Games.”

Have I mentioned that Jennifer Lawrence is hot?  She is fully formed (and not 16 – at least in this world)!

Any bad?

Only if you are so stuck up that reading is cool and you remember the book.  SPOILERS!  Mutations looked like “Twilight” wolves for retards (redundant).  Where were the tongue-less freak Avox people (movie foul!)?  Foxface needed lines (hot for fox (redundant), yet not Jennifer).

That’s it.  Not bad.

Verdict?

Two thumbs up… no joke here.  Although District 12 brings Finland into my head, I still have the love on.

May the odds be ever in your favor – except for “Twilight”… that shit can die in a fire.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “The Voice” may be the thing for T.V. to watch.  Erin Martin?  Advancing in singing competition with looks?  I loveAmerica!!!

Project X [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Project X, Nima Nourizadeh, Matt Drake, Michael Bacall, Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Dax Flame, Kirby Bliss Blanton, Brady Hender, Nick Nervies, Alexis Knapp, Miles Teller, Peter Mackenzie, Caitlin Dulany, Rob Evors, Rick Shapiro, Martin Klebba, Pete Gardner, Nichole Bloom, Sam Lant, Henry Michaelson, Brendan Miller, Brent Tamol, Kyle Kwasnick, David Sanchez, Ayyde Vargas, Chelsea Carbaugh-Rutland, Zach Lasry, Micahel C. Stretton, Andrew Harbour, Allan Chanes, Holden Morse, Rax Mataz, Briana Mari Wilde, Jarod Einsohn, Chet Hanks, Julian Evens, Jesse Marco, Chic Daniels, Kevin Dunigan, Colleen Flynn, Sophia Santi, Jodi Harris, Frank Buckley, Serene Branson, Robb Reesman, Kevin Ryder, Gene 'Bean' Baxter, Big Boy, Jimmy Kimmel, Jillian Barberie, Scott Budnick, Marty Ewing, Alex Heineman, Todd Phillips, Steve Richards, Andrew Rona, Joel Silver, Ken Seng, Jeff Groth, Juel Bestrop, Seth Yanklewitz, Bill Brzeski, Desma Murphy, Alison McCosh, Jennifer Corey, David Jacobson, Mark Scoon, David Siegel, Imhotep Coleman, Allan Graf, Michael Neumann, Paul Byme Prenderville, Katey Wheelhouse, Micahel A. Casey, Steve Coover, Kiel Gookin, Eddie Grisco, Damon Hight, David Lee Fein, Marla McGuire, Coleman Metts, Rick Owens, Trevor Sperry, Ryan Andersen, Michael Sean Foley, Casey Adams, jeffrey Barnett, Michael Barnett, Todd Bryant, Wayne Dalglish, Tara Deadrick, Justin Gant, Allan Graf, Zac Henry, Sara HOlden, Tim James, Jim Stephan, Jake Swallow, David Woodruff, Scott Workman, Joseph Aguirre, Beth Dubber, Pete Johnson, George Maxwell, Eric Tramp, John Trunk, Bill Dance, Adam Ohi, Afnahn Khan, Gene Hilfer, Dave Lawrence, Jacob Nathan, Jason Ruder, Matthew Ackerson, Susan Bliss, Bettina Browne, Jeanne Byrd, Florence Chung, Chris Cortez, Jeanie Daniels, Alyssa Feener, Alaina Filo, Toby Gallo, Elliot Gannon, Jeremy Gilbreath, Aaron Hammersley, Hans Hernke, Josie Hines, Michael E. Jacobson, Alice S. Kim, Caroline Livengood, Christopher J. Maldonado, Dylan Matlock, Justin Mickelson, Carolina Maria Mora, Eric Petersen, Amy Poncher, Lara Ravdjee, Ryan Robertson, Maxwell Salbert, Emma Siegel, Karl Sonnenberg, Kirk Sullivan, Coleman Trapp, Carrie Tyson, Chris Winn

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Project X, Nima Nourizadeh, Matt Drake, Michael Bacall, Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Dax Flame, Kirby Bliss Blanton, Brady Hender, Nick Nervies, Alexis Knapp, Miles Teller, Peter Mackenzie, Caitlin Dulany, Rob Evors, Rick Shapiro, Martin Klebba, Pete Gardner, Nichole Bloom, Sam Lant, Henry Michaelson, Brendan Miller, Brent Tamol, Kyle Kwasnick, David Sanchez, Ayyde Vargas, Chelsea Carbaugh-Rutland, Zach Lasry, Micahel C. Stretton, Andrew Harbour, Allan Chanes, Holden Morse, Rax Mataz, Briana Mari Wilde, Jarod Einsohn, Chet Hanks, Julian Evens, Jesse Marco, Chic Daniels, Kevin Dunigan, Colleen Flynn, Sophia Santi, Jodi Harris, Frank Buckley, Serene Branson, Robb Reesman, Kevin Ryder, Gene 'Bean' Baxter, Big Boy, Jimmy Kimmel, Jillian Barberie, Scott Budnick, Marty Ewing, Alex Heineman, Todd Phillips, Steve Richards, Andrew Rona, Joel Silver, Ken Seng, Jeff Groth, Juel Bestrop, Seth Yanklewitz, Bill Brzeski, Desma Murphy, Alison McCosh, Jennifer Corey, David Jacobson, Mark Scoon, David Siegel, Imhotep Coleman, Allan Graf, Michael Neumann, Paul Byme Prenderville, Katey Wheelhouse, Micahel A. Casey, Steve Coover, Kiel Gookin, Eddie Grisco, Damon Hight, David Lee Fein, Marla McGuire, Coleman Metts, Rick Owens, Trevor Sperry, Ryan Andersen, Michael Sean Foley, Casey Adams, jeffrey Barnett, Michael Barnett, Todd Bryant, Wayne Dalglish, Tara Deadrick, Justin Gant, Allan Graf, Zac Henry, Sara HOlden, Tim James, Jim Stephan, Jake Swallow, David Woodruff, Scott Workman, Joseph Aguirre, Beth Dubber, Pete Johnson, George Maxwell, Eric Tramp, John Trunk, Bill Dance, Adam Ohi, Afnahn Khan, Gene Hilfer, Dave Lawrence, Jacob Nathan, Jason Ruder, Matthew Ackerson, Susan Bliss, Bettina Browne, Jeanne Byrd, Florence Chung, Chris Cortez, Jeanie Daniels, Alyssa Feener, Alaina Filo, Toby Gallo, Elliot Gannon, Jeremy Gilbreath, Aaron Hammersley, Hans Hernke, Josie Hines, Michael E. Jacobson, Alice S. Kim, Caroline Livengood, Christopher J. Maldonado, Dylan Matlock, Justin Mickelson, Carolina Maria Mora, Eric Petersen, Amy Poncher, Lara Ravdjee, Ryan Robertson, Maxwell Salbert, Emma Siegel, Karl Sonnenberg, Kirk Sullivan, Coleman Trapp, Carrie Tyson, Chris WinnProject X

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Thanks to Odin.  Much thanks.

Why?

Tuesday, with the fact that Tuesday must happen, happens.

Tuesday?

Reviewing assignments for Friday.

My mind is sweating mind thoughts:  “Please Odin, if I am to review that damn “Lorax” movie, drop me first with a face stretching stroke.  Explode my eyeballs.  Make me never to see the whoring out of a great man by his money grubbing widow (because I already am still in the stink of “Cat In The Hat”Mike Meyers, you make Canada sad with this.).

Then the God of Cargo came through – assignment “Project X.”

The “YES” I screamed was like that of Ron Jeremy in the day of hay.

“Project X.”

Teenagers in heat.

Crazy crap of the happening.

The party is bigger than big – or than the big it should have been (“Risky Business”, but funny).

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Project X, Nima Nourizadeh, Matt Drake, Michael Bacall, Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Dax Flame, Kirby Bliss Blanton, Brady Hender, Nick Nervies, Alexis Knapp, Miles Teller, Peter Mackenzie, Caitlin Dulany, Rob Evors, Rick Shapiro, Martin Klebba, Pete Gardner, Nichole Bloom, Sam Lant, Henry Michaelson, Brendan Miller, Brent Tamol, Kyle Kwasnick, David Sanchez, Ayyde Vargas, Chelsea Carbaugh-Rutland, Zach Lasry, Micahel C. Stretton, Andrew Harbour, Allan Chanes, Holden Morse, Rax Mataz, Briana Mari Wilde, Jarod Einsohn, Chet Hanks, Julian Evens, Jesse Marco, Chic Daniels, Kevin Dunigan, Colleen Flynn, Sophia Santi, Jodi Harris, Frank Buckley, Serene Branson, Robb Reesman, Kevin Ryder, Gene 'Bean' Baxter, Big Boy, Jimmy Kimmel, Jillian Barberie, Scott Budnick, Marty Ewing, Alex Heineman, Todd Phillips, Steve Richards, Andrew Rona, Joel Silver, Ken Seng, Jeff Groth, Juel Bestrop, Seth Yanklewitz, Bill Brzeski, Desma Murphy, Alison McCosh, Jennifer Corey, David Jacobson, Mark Scoon, David Siegel, Imhotep Coleman, Allan Graf, Michael Neumann, Paul Byme Prenderville, Katey Wheelhouse, Micahel A. Casey, Steve Coover, Kiel Gookin, Eddie Grisco, Damon Hight, David Lee Fein, Marla McGuire, Coleman Metts, Rick Owens, Trevor Sperry, Ryan Andersen, Michael Sean Foley, Casey Adams, jeffrey Barnett, Michael Barnett, Todd Bryant, Wayne Dalglish, Tara Deadrick, Justin Gant, Allan Graf, Zac Henry, Sara HOlden, Tim James, Jim Stephan, Jake Swallow, David Woodruff, Scott Workman, Joseph Aguirre, Beth Dubber, Pete Johnson, George Maxwell, Eric Tramp, John Trunk, Bill Dance, Adam Ohi, Afnahn Khan, Gene Hilfer, Dave Lawrence, Jacob Nathan, Jason Ruder, Matthew Ackerson, Susan Bliss, Bettina Browne, Jeanne Byrd, Florence Chung, Chris Cortez, Jeanie Daniels, Alyssa Feener, Alaina Filo, Toby Gallo, Elliot Gannon, Jeremy Gilbreath, Aaron Hammersley, Hans Hernke, Josie Hines, Michael E. Jacobson, Alice S. Kim, Caroline Livengood, Christopher J. Maldonado, Dylan Matlock, Justin Mickelson, Carolina Maria Mora, Eric Petersen, Amy Poncher, Lara Ravdjee, Ryan Robertson, Maxwell Salbert, Emma Siegel, Karl Sonnenberg, Kirk Sullivan, Coleman Trapp, Carrie Tyson, Chris WinnFirst, I, Kimmo place a major hit in the bong.  I say you, the viewer, must do the same.

Then another.

Then one more.

“Project X” is now the adolescent party gone out of bounds “Citizen Kane.”  Without stupid sleds.  Or story.

Movies with plot are over the rated.  Serious.

Plot?  Really?

You are to the reading of a critic think write of “Project X” and you are really thinking the plot is a thing of mattering?  Plot is replaced by:

1)    Boobs

2)    Butt

3)    Tight female bellies (which must be under the age – High School, right?  HOT!!!)

4)    Booze

5)    Midgets

6)    Boobs

7)    Drugs (not just me)

8)    Car in pool

9)    Fat kids to fun out on

10)  Boobs

11)  Hand held camera!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Project X, Nima Nourizadeh, Matt Drake, Michael Bacall, Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Dax Flame, Kirby Bliss Blanton, Brady Hender, Nick Nervies, Alexis Knapp, Miles Teller, Peter Mackenzie, Caitlin Dulany, Rob Evors, Rick Shapiro, Martin Klebba, Pete Gardner, Nichole Bloom, Sam Lant, Henry Michaelson, Brendan Miller, Brent Tamol, Kyle Kwasnick, David Sanchez, Ayyde Vargas, Chelsea Carbaugh-Rutland, Zach Lasry, Micahel C. Stretton, Andrew Harbour, Allan Chanes, Holden Morse, Rax Mataz, Briana Mari Wilde, Jarod Einsohn, Chet Hanks, Julian Evens, Jesse Marco, Chic Daniels, Kevin Dunigan, Colleen Flynn, Sophia Santi, Jodi Harris, Frank Buckley, Serene Branson, Robb Reesman, Kevin Ryder, Gene 'Bean' Baxter, Big Boy, Jimmy Kimmel, Jillian Barberie, Scott Budnick, Marty Ewing, Alex Heineman, Todd Phillips, Steve Richards, Andrew Rona, Joel Silver, Ken Seng, Jeff Groth, Juel Bestrop, Seth Yanklewitz, Bill Brzeski, Desma Murphy, Alison McCosh, Jennifer Corey, David Jacobson, Mark Scoon, David Siegel, Imhotep Coleman, Allan Graf, Michael Neumann, Paul Byme Prenderville, Katey Wheelhouse, Micahel A. Casey, Steve Coover, Kiel Gookin, Eddie Grisco, Damon Hight, David Lee Fein, Marla McGuire, Coleman Metts, Rick Owens, Trevor Sperry, Ryan Andersen, Michael Sean Foley, Casey Adams, jeffrey Barnett, Michael Barnett, Todd Bryant, Wayne Dalglish, Tara Deadrick, Justin Gant, Allan Graf, Zac Henry, Sara HOlden, Tim James, Jim Stephan, Jake Swallow, David Woodruff, Scott Workman, Joseph Aguirre, Beth Dubber, Pete Johnson, George Maxwell, Eric Tramp, John Trunk, Bill Dance, Adam Ohi, Afnahn Khan, Gene Hilfer, Dave Lawrence, Jacob Nathan, Jason Ruder, Matthew Ackerson, Susan Bliss, Bettina Browne, Jeanne Byrd, Florence Chung, Chris Cortez, Jeanie Daniels, Alyssa Feener, Alaina Filo, Toby Gallo, Elliot Gannon, Jeremy Gilbreath, Aaron Hammersley, Hans Hernke, Josie Hines, Michael E. Jacobson, Alice S. Kim, Caroline Livengood, Christopher J. Maldonado, Dylan Matlock, Justin Mickelson, Carolina Maria Mora, Eric Petersen, Amy Poncher, Lara Ravdjee, Ryan Robertson, Maxwell Salbert, Emma Siegel, Karl Sonnenberg, Kirk Sullivan, Coleman Trapp, Carrie Tyson, Chris WinnIs this “Cloverfield”?  Better.

“The Blair Witch Project” (more boobs than the witch here)?  Better.

“Paranormal Activity 1-15”?  Better.

The “why” is answered by boobs.  And crazy teen hi-jinks.  Virgins deflowered.  Window broken.  Then another broken.  And hymens (see the deflowering before, but also with the broken part.  YES!).

Do you feel that I am in love with this film?  I am.

It pretends to be nothing more than it is.  Party out of bounds (thanks, B-52’s).  I laughed.  I coughed (after another pull on the dugout I recently purchased off of internet sales).

Conclusion:  If when the seeing of the trailer for this film makes you say “Hells yeah, if I miss this, my life is lesser than that it was” you will love it.

If when you see the trailer you feel the stick crawl up your butt telling you that “fun is only for the young?”  Stay home and watch “Matlock.”

This is no “Shark Night 3-D.”

And, thanks to Odin, this isn’t the crap licking “Lorax.”  I can thank more than one God for that.

So, one thumb asleep.  The other thumb erect, because that thumb likes on the boobs.  Who doesn’t?

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “Glee?”  WTF?!?  Ryan Murphy, although before I never let the suspect for my boner on Dianna Agron, you have gone too much far.  Our feud is to for the public.  I call you out.  Why is my mind your mess?  There will be blood.

Wanderlust [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Behind The Proscenium, Wanderlust, David Wain, Ken Marino, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Anniston, Justin Theroux, Alan Alda, Malin Akerman, Ken Marino, JOe Lo Truglio, Kathryn Hahn, Kerri Kenney, Lauren Ambrose, Michaela Watkins, Jordan Peele, Linda Lavin, Jessica St. Clair, Todd Barry, Martin Thompson, Ian Patrick, John D'Leo, David Wain, Michael Showalter, Michael Ian Black, Zandy Hartig, Keegan Michael Key, Mather Zickel, Juan Piedrahita, Peter Salett, Patricia French, Nina Hellman, Richard Allan Jones, Juana Samayoa, David Cardenas, Sharon Lubin, Vester Grayson, Ronald McFarlin, Roger Parham-Brown, Jim Moffatt, Sung-Suk Garber, Craig Wedren, Amy Miles, Charles Gansa, Roberto Zincone, Fran Capitanelli, Judd Apatow, David Soldinger, Richard Vane, David Wain, Craig Wedren, Michael Bonvillain, David Moritz, Robert Nassau, Susie Farris, Aaron Osborne, Lay'Na Anderson, Andy Clement, Marcei A. Brown, Kyle David Crosby, Gina Fortunato, Lisa Rodgers, Dara Weintraub, Mark Cotone, Alexander H. Gayner, Jack Gill, Casey Madigan, Jeremy Reisig, Megan Schmidt, Yumiko Takeya, Bill Barnes, George Anderson, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Jesse Dodd, Tammy Fearing, Larry Kemp, Andy Malcolm, Ken McLaughlin, Paul Tirone, Justin Bourret, Brett Carroll, Brandon Lee Tenney, Natalie Alexander, Thomas Bianco, Nick Bommer, Christina Bonaccorse, Corey Brinn, Chris Burns, Robin Citrin, Michael Dean, Joe Everett, Jillian Fouts, Tina Hamilton, Cory Kadamani, Brady Kephart, Danielle King, Samantha Kirkeby, Jennifer Klatt, Iran Kuykendall, Ryan Lavalette, Meegan Neeb, Bill Oaks, Tony Osso, Zac Oyama, Stephanie Paull, Ellen Pfirrmann, Sally Potters, Joe Riddle, Robert Rizzolo, Greg Rothstein, Liz Smallwood, David Spiegelman, Sarah Sprague, Caroline jaden Stussi, Shaun Surgener, Whitney Teubner, Greg Tresan, Natalie Tyler, Britny Vanderstelt, Porter Versfelt, Lisa Vijitchanton, Christoph Vogt, Thomas Ward

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Behind The Proscenium, Wanderlust, David Wain, Ken Marino, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Anniston, Justin Theroux, Alan Alda, Malin Akerman, Ken Marino, JOe Lo Truglio, Kathryn Hahn, Kerri Kenney, Lauren Ambrose, Michaela Watkins, Jordan Peele, Linda Lavin, Jessica St. Clair, Todd Barry, Martin Thompson, Ian Patrick, John D'Leo, David Wain, Michael Showalter, Michael Ian Black, Zandy Hartig, Keegan Michael Key, Mather Zickel, Juan Piedrahita, Peter Salett, Patricia French, Nina Hellman, Richard Allan Jones, Juana Samayoa, David Cardenas, Sharon Lubin, Vester Grayson, Ronald McFarlin, Roger Parham-Brown, Jim Moffatt, Sung-Suk Garber, Craig Wedren, Amy Miles, Charles Gansa, Roberto Zincone, Fran Capitanelli, Judd Apatow, David Soldinger, Richard Vane, David Wain, Craig Wedren, Michael Bonvillain, David Moritz, Robert Nassau, Susie Farris, Aaron Osborne, Lay'Na Anderson, Andy Clement, Marcei A. Brown, Kyle David Crosby, Gina Fortunato, Lisa Rodgers, Dara Weintraub, Mark Cotone, Alexander H. Gayner, Jack Gill, Casey Madigan, Jeremy Reisig, Megan Schmidt, Yumiko Takeya, Bill Barnes, George Anderson, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Jesse Dodd, Tammy Fearing, Larry Kemp, Andy Malcolm, Ken McLaughlin, Paul Tirone, Justin Bourret, Brett Carroll, Brandon Lee Tenney, Natalie Alexander, Thomas Bianco, Nick Bommer, Christina Bonaccorse, Corey Brinn, Chris Burns, Robin Citrin, Michael Dean, Joe Everett, Jillian Fouts, Tina Hamilton, Cory Kadamani, Brady Kephart, Danielle King, Samantha Kirkeby, Jennifer Klatt, Iran Kuykendall, Ryan Lavalette, Meegan Neeb, Bill Oaks, Tony Osso, Zac Oyama, Stephanie Paull, Ellen Pfirrmann, Sally Potters, Joe Riddle, Robert Rizzolo, Greg Rothstein, Liz Smallwood, David Spiegelman, Sarah Sprague, Caroline jaden Stussi, Shaun Surgener, Whitney Teubner, Greg Tresan, Natalie Tyler, Britny Vanderstelt, Porter Versfelt, Lisa Vijitchanton, Christoph Vogt, Thomas WardWanderlust

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Sad writing times still sad.

To you, one less ferret.

To me, one less heart string by rodent warmed (Ed. Note – see last week.  Sad.).

Movies?  Films?  Cinema?

Do now I even care?

Well.  Yes.

I am a professional.

Roger Ebert never had the losing of constructive three weeks ruined.  He is just jawless.  Which is BADASS!!!

I am high.

“Wanderlust.”

WTF?

Good for the hoping?!?  “Hells yes!”, in my mind I thought.

Why not?  David Wain?  Pretty funny for sure.

Some Appatow producing?  Why THE HELL not?!?

The world needs more penis jokes.

Full disclosure:  I am almost the gay for Paul Rudd as for the Puss In Boots.”  Malin Akerman makes my man parts yearn to the moon (and beyond).  Ken Marino?  Funny, bitches!

Movie?  Film?  Cinema?

Meh.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Behind The Proscenium, Wanderlust, David Wain, Ken Marino, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Anniston, Justin Theroux, Alan Alda, Malin Akerman, Ken Marino, JOe Lo Truglio, Kathryn Hahn, Kerri Kenney, Lauren Ambrose, Michaela Watkins, Jordan Peele, Linda Lavin, Jessica St. Clair, Todd Barry, Martin Thompson, Ian Patrick, John D'Leo, David Wain, Michael Showalter, Michael Ian Black, Zandy Hartig, Keegan Michael Key, Mather Zickel, Juan Piedrahita, Peter Salett, Patricia French, Nina Hellman, Richard Allan Jones, Juana Samayoa, David Cardenas, Sharon Lubin, Vester Grayson, Ronald McFarlin, Roger Parham-Brown, Jim Moffatt, Sung-Suk Garber, Craig Wedren, Amy Miles, Charles Gansa, Roberto Zincone, Fran Capitanelli, Judd Apatow, David Soldinger, Richard Vane, David Wain, Craig Wedren, Michael Bonvillain, David Moritz, Robert Nassau, Susie Farris, Aaron Osborne, Lay'Na Anderson, Andy Clement, Marcei A. Brown, Kyle David Crosby, Gina Fortunato, Lisa Rodgers, Dara Weintraub, Mark Cotone, Alexander H. Gayner, Jack Gill, Casey Madigan, Jeremy Reisig, Megan Schmidt, Yumiko Takeya, Bill Barnes, George Anderson, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Jesse Dodd, Tammy Fearing, Larry Kemp, Andy Malcolm, Ken McLaughlin, Paul Tirone, Justin Bourret, Brett Carroll, Brandon Lee Tenney, Natalie Alexander, Thomas Bianco, Nick Bommer, Christina Bonaccorse, Corey Brinn, Chris Burns, Robin Citrin, Michael Dean, Joe Everett, Jillian Fouts, Tina Hamilton, Cory Kadamani, Brady Kephart, Danielle King, Samantha Kirkeby, Jennifer Klatt, Iran Kuykendall, Ryan Lavalette, Meegan Neeb, Bill Oaks, Tony Osso, Zac Oyama, Stephanie Paull, Ellen Pfirrmann, Sally Potters, Joe Riddle, Robert Rizzolo, Greg Rothstein, Liz Smallwood, David Spiegelman, Sarah Sprague, Caroline jaden Stussi, Shaun Surgener, Whitney Teubner, Greg Tresan, Natalie Tyler, Britny Vanderstelt, Porter Versfelt, Lisa Vijitchanton, Christoph Vogt, Thomas WardPlot?  Not really, but try I must (Do, Kimmo, do!  I hear you, Yoda!).

Linda (Jennifer Aniston) and George (Paul Rudd) have losing of work and only hitting hard the road can anything worthy of thought matter.

Then (being caught of the disease “movie dumb”), into Georgia they wander really.

Not good Georgia (former Soviets, science, industry) – but retard Georgia (peanuts, Creationism, crackers).  Yet by not making Georgia they find communal living.

And Malin Akerman.  More to come.

Jokes?  Yes!  And bad.  Pubic hair.

Saying “dick” (funny when high, so funny at this time to me).  Stereotypes that were original in the period of Never.

Oh!  And closing credit out-takes!

Odin, this is the bestest!  Never done in my life before my eye holes!

This movie is defeating me.  Ennui hurts more than any other tired.

Now we leave the review for momentarily…

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Behind The Proscenium, Wanderlust, David Wain, Ken Marino, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Anniston, Justin Theroux, Alan Alda, Malin Akerman, Ken Marino, JOe Lo Truglio, Kathryn Hahn, Kerri Kenney, Lauren Ambrose, Michaela Watkins, Jordan Peele, Linda Lavin, Jessica St. Clair, Todd Barry, Martin Thompson, Ian Patrick, John D'Leo, David Wain, Michael Showalter, Michael Ian Black, Zandy Hartig, Keegan Michael Key, Mather Zickel, Juan Piedrahita, Peter Salett, Patricia French, Nina Hellman, Richard Allan Jones, Juana Samayoa, David Cardenas, Sharon Lubin, Vester Grayson, Ronald McFarlin, Roger Parham-Brown, Jim Moffatt, Sung-Suk Garber, Craig Wedren, Amy Miles, Charles Gansa, Roberto Zincone, Fran Capitanelli, Judd Apatow, David Soldinger, Richard Vane, David Wain, Craig Wedren, Michael Bonvillain, David Moritz, Robert Nassau, Susie Farris, Aaron Osborne, Lay'Na Anderson, Andy Clement, Marcei A. Brown, Kyle David Crosby, Gina Fortunato, Lisa Rodgers, Dara Weintraub, Mark Cotone, Alexander H. Gayner, Jack Gill, Casey Madigan, Jeremy Reisig, Megan Schmidt, Yumiko Takeya, Bill Barnes, George Anderson, Bill Burns, Jenna Dalla Riva, Jesse Dodd, Tammy Fearing, Larry Kemp, Andy Malcolm, Ken McLaughlin, Paul Tirone, Justin Bourret, Brett Carroll, Brandon Lee Tenney, Natalie Alexander, Thomas Bianco, Nick Bommer, Christina Bonaccorse, Corey Brinn, Chris Burns, Robin Citrin, Michael Dean, Joe Everett, Jillian Fouts, Tina Hamilton, Cory Kadamani, Brady Kephart, Danielle King, Samantha Kirkeby, Jennifer Klatt, Iran Kuykendall, Ryan Lavalette, Meegan Neeb, Bill Oaks, Tony Osso, Zac Oyama, Stephanie Paull, Ellen Pfirrmann, Sally Potters, Joe Riddle, Robert Rizzolo, Greg Rothstein, Liz Smallwood, David Spiegelman, Sarah Sprague, Caroline jaden Stussi, Shaun Surgener, Whitney Teubner, Greg Tresan, Natalie Tyler, Britny Vanderstelt, Porter Versfelt, Lisa Vijitchanton, Christoph Vogt, Thomas WardWhy in February?

Is Universal much about the write off loss (so many questions – damn Kossu shots!).  I have never tasted the accounting and still for the numbers I strain.

Are the Universal hoping for cinema death, to write off against anything that bathes in money?

Oh, to bath in money.

The entire movie taste is placed on the liking of the leads.

In your mind Rudd sucks?  Then this sucks.

In your mind Aniston sucks?  Same.

In your mind Akerman sucks?  I will kill you.  In your goddamn face.  And don’t even touch her.  Your death would be epic (for me) and of agony (for you).  With fucking fire.  Bitch.

So… really.  See this crap if you are for the $15 to pump back into Uncle Sam.  One thumb sideways.  Malin Akerman is a goddess.

Else?  Whatever.  Do what you have to do.  I cannot stop you.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  As “Fringe” comes to an end I want to J.J. Abrams say “nice job”.  We will never again mention “Lost”.  You asshole.

P.P.S.  Fluffy.  I said it.  Crying begins once more.  Damn.

Ghost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Jill Kennedy, OnMedea, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor, Scott M. Gimple, Seth Hoffman, David S. Goyer, Nicolas Cage, Violante Placido, Ciaran Hinds, Idris Elba, Johnny Whitworth, Fergus Riordan, Spencer Wilding, Sorin Tofan, Jacek Koman, Anthony Head, Christian Iacob, Christopher Lambert, Jai Stefan, Vincent Regan, Ionut Cristian Lefter, Will Ashcroft, Sabina Branduse, Tobias Ojerfalk, Adina Galupa, Alin Panc, Ashok Amritraj, Ari Arad, Avi Arad, Stefan Brunner, Michael De Luca, Gary Foster, Manu Gargi, Mark Steven Johnson, Steven Paul, E. Bennett Walsh, David Sardy, Brandon Trost, Brian Berdan, Colin Jones, Gail Stevens, Kevin Phipps, Adrian Curelea, Serban Porupca, Justin Warburton-Brown, Dominic Capon, Bojana Nikitovic, Lisa Buscher, Daniela Busoiu, Adelina Popa, Adrian Conerth, Bogdan Moncea, Simona Dinu, Sean Guest, Mircea Hategan, james Andrew Haven, Deb Adair, Jamy Kim, Peter Jurca, Drew King, Jarrett Lee, Steve Mele, Pat Sarrel, Lee Adamson, Rick English, Daniel Visan, Nick Baxter, Clint Bennett, Kier Lehman, Patrick Aiello, Vasile Anghel, Razvan Badea, Andra Barbuica, Susan Bliss, Alexandru Bogdan, Madalina Bugeanu, Ana Ramona Damiean, Alina David, Ecaterina Dinu, Mike Doughtery, Monica Duta, Marius Florescu, Miruna Gheorghiu, Melis Gobekcioglu, Toygar Ilik, Kahraman Kavas, Fiona Landreth, Melanie Lawrence, Scott Levine, Peter Moses, Neda Pavlovic, Paul Pawlowski, Irina Raducanu, Irina Scurt, Daniela Soare, Eve Swannell, Sarah Zyke, Monica Urziceanu

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Jill Kennedy, OnMedea, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor, Scott M. Gimple, Seth Hoffman, David S. Goyer, Nicolas Cage, Violante Placido, Ciaran Hinds, Idris Elba, Johnny Whitworth, Fergus Riordan, Spencer Wilding, Sorin Tofan, Jacek Koman, Anthony Head, Christian Iacob, Christopher Lambert, Jai Stefan, Vincent Regan, Ionut Cristian Lefter, Will Ashcroft, Sabina Branduse, Tobias Ojerfalk, Adina Galupa, Alin Panc, Ashok Amritraj, Ari Arad, Avi Arad, Stefan Brunner, Michael De Luca, Gary Foster, Manu Gargi, Mark Steven Johnson, Steven Paul, E. Bennett Walsh, David Sardy, Brandon Trost, Brian Berdan, Colin Jones, Gail Stevens, Kevin Phipps, Adrian Curelea, Serban Porupca, Justin Warburton-Brown, Dominic Capon, Bojana Nikitovic, Lisa Buscher, Daniela Busoiu, Adelina Popa, Adrian Conerth, Bogdan Moncea, Simona Dinu, Sean Guest, Mircea Hategan, james Andrew Haven, Deb Adair, Jamy Kim, Peter Jurca, Drew King, Jarrett Lee, Steve Mele, Pat Sarrel, Lee Adamson, Rick English, Daniel Visan, Nick Baxter, Clint Bennett, Kier Lehman, Patrick Aiello, Vasile Anghel, Razvan Badea, Andra Barbuica, Susan Bliss, Alexandru Bogdan, Madalina Bugeanu, Ana Ramona Damiean, Alina David, Ecaterina Dinu, Mike Doughtery, Monica Duta, Marius Florescu, Miruna Gheorghiu, Melis Gobekcioglu, Toygar Ilik, Kahraman Kavas, Fiona Landreth, Melanie Lawrence, Scott Levine, Peter Moses, Neda Pavlovic, Paul Pawlowski, Irina Raducanu, Irina Scurt, Daniela Soare, Eve Swannell, Sarah Zyke, Monica UrziceanuGhost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Many apologies for the writing lack for two weeks.

Fluffy the Wonder Ferret, greatest animal in history, crossed the Rainbow Bridgeand now feasts on ferret food with Jesus – and other ferrets who also have caught the death.

I took time away from the critic things.

I cried, baby style.  Then I cried again.

Why?

Because on the returning to work I found I get to review “Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance.”

Who is the Ghost Rider?

Did you see even the first one?

He is Marvel’s darkest hero.  A hell of a biker (joke!), a sort of hybrid man-demon who fights with the forces of Lucifer as the good guy.  This is with a burning skull head and no face – which is cool after many sweet, sweet bong loads.

Without the bonging, not so much.

Remember?

Or, like me, did you erase your mind of the first one?  I’ll refresh you.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Jill Kennedy, OnMedea, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor, Scott M. Gimple, Seth Hoffman, David S. Goyer, Nicolas Cage, Violante Placido, Ciaran Hinds, Idris Elba, Johnny Whitworth, Fergus Riordan, Spencer Wilding, Sorin Tofan, Jacek Koman, Anthony Head, Christian Iacob, Christopher Lambert, Jai Stefan, Vincent Regan, Ionut Cristian Lefter, Will Ashcroft, Sabina Branduse, Tobias Ojerfalk, Adina Galupa, Alin Panc, Ashok Amritraj, Ari Arad, Avi Arad, Stefan Brunner, Michael De Luca, Gary Foster, Manu Gargi, Mark Steven Johnson, Steven Paul, E. Bennett Walsh, David Sardy, Brandon Trost, Brian Berdan, Colin Jones, Gail Stevens, Kevin Phipps, Adrian Curelea, Serban Porupca, Justin Warburton-Brown, Dominic Capon, Bojana Nikitovic, Lisa Buscher, Daniela Busoiu, Adelina Popa, Adrian Conerth, Bogdan Moncea, Simona Dinu, Sean Guest, Mircea Hategan, james Andrew Haven, Deb Adair, Jamy Kim, Peter Jurca, Drew King, Jarrett Lee, Steve Mele, Pat Sarrel, Lee Adamson, Rick English, Daniel Visan, Nick Baxter, Clint Bennett, Kier Lehman, Patrick Aiello, Vasile Anghel, Razvan Badea, Andra Barbuica, Susan Bliss, Alexandru Bogdan, Madalina Bugeanu, Ana Ramona Damiean, Alina David, Ecaterina Dinu, Mike Doughtery, Monica Duta, Marius Florescu, Miruna Gheorghiu, Melis Gobekcioglu, Toygar Ilik, Kahraman Kavas, Fiona Landreth, Melanie Lawrence, Scott Levine, Peter Moses, Neda Pavlovic, Paul Pawlowski, Irina Raducanu, Irina Scurt, Daniela Soare, Eve Swannell, Sarah Zyke, Monica UrziceanuOnce Johnny Blaze sold his soul to the devil, and won only sufferer until he managed to outwit Satan similarly and to keep the forces of the Riders for themselves to use them for good.

This confuses.

Remember?

Ends approximately in the way Ghost Rider” to unleash the first attempt in the year 2007, the demonic biker on the big screen.  Managed to cartoonish staging it but not really convincing.

Too much slapstick, romance and – if one disregards the Lucifer-esque performance by Peter Fonda – an opponent who seemed so threatening, like a teen boy-band member

Whether it should then be a sequel, especially under the contribute by Nicolas Cage, was long doubtful until the end – but were still 75 million reasons to shoot a sequel, and let heat with Cage-head inflamed again over the marble pavement (on a motorcycle.  No shit!).

Plot?  Here we go!

This time is somewhere in Eastern Europe, a sect of devil worshipers after a boy (Fergus Riordan) go, which brings extraordinary occult powers in itself.

To defend this guy, a secret society of warrior monks (bad-assery!) swore.  The Satanists, led by its top guru (Ciaran Hinds) have taken hold of the boy. Now, only the Ghost Rider can help.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Jill Kennedy, OnMedea, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor, Scott M. Gimple, Seth Hoffman, David S. Goyer, Nicolas Cage, Violante Placido, Ciaran Hinds, Idris Elba, Johnny Whitworth, Fergus Riordan, Spencer Wilding, Sorin Tofan, Jacek Koman, Anthony Head, Christian Iacob, Christopher Lambert, Jai Stefan, Vincent Regan, Ionut Cristian Lefter, Will Ashcroft, Sabina Branduse, Tobias Ojerfalk, Adina Galupa, Alin Panc, Ashok Amritraj, Ari Arad, Avi Arad, Stefan Brunner, Michael De Luca, Gary Foster, Manu Gargi, Mark Steven Johnson, Steven Paul, E. Bennett Walsh, David Sardy, Brandon Trost, Brian Berdan, Colin Jones, Gail Stevens, Kevin Phipps, Adrian Curelea, Serban Porupca, Justin Warburton-Brown, Dominic Capon, Bojana Nikitovic, Lisa Buscher, Daniela Busoiu, Adelina Popa, Adrian Conerth, Bogdan Moncea, Simona Dinu, Sean Guest, Mircea Hategan, james Andrew Haven, Deb Adair, Jamy Kim, Peter Jurca, Drew King, Jarrett Lee, Steve Mele, Pat Sarrel, Lee Adamson, Rick English, Daniel Visan, Nick Baxter, Clint Bennett, Kier Lehman, Patrick Aiello, Vasile Anghel, Razvan Badea, Andra Barbuica, Susan Bliss, Alexandru Bogdan, Madalina Bugeanu, Ana Ramona Damiean, Alina David, Ecaterina Dinu, Mike Doughtery, Monica Duta, Marius Florescu, Miruna Gheorghiu, Melis Gobekcioglu, Toygar Ilik, Kahraman Kavas, Fiona Landreth, Melanie Lawrence, Scott Levine, Peter Moses, Neda Pavlovic, Paul Pawlowski, Irina Raducanu, Irina Scurt, Daniela Soare, Eve Swannell, Sarah Zyke, Monica UrziceanuJohnny Blaze (I was blazed, let me tell you) lives in seclusion, however, and would again be a demon in any way.  Moreau (Idris Elba), one of the warrior monks, succeeds him then but still convincing – after all, it’s again about beating the devil’s trick – and off you go.

Wheee!

Even if one wants to be on the first part, it had at least still something of a plot and a few original ideas.

Peter Fonda was also off a fabulously smug Lucifer, the lovely Eva Mendes (schwing!) is already a well-bred eye-catching and Sam Elliott’s (“the Dude abides”!) performances were always kind of cult.

All this gave the previous charm, something that Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance” completely lacks.

The figures, like Idris Elba, Ciaran Hinds and even Christopher Lambert in a brief guest appearance, get far too little opportunity which would be able to see to it.  Right?  Right.

So, this Ghost Rider gets one limp thumb – limp as Fluffy the Wonder Ferret before the rigor mortis gave him a stiff.

At least it wasn’t in 3-D (the movie – ferrets are always in 3-D).  I’m off to smoke for Fluffy and for more the crying…

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  “American Idol” needs more hot chicks – and less passing out during “Hollywood Week.”  Or more passing out.  I’m undecided.  But definitely more hot chicks.

Man On A Ledge [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Man on a Ledge, Asger Leth, Pablo F. Fenjves, Sam Worthington, Mandy Gonzalez, Barbara Marineau, J. Smith-Cameron, Anthony Mackie, Patrick Collins, Jamie Bell, Genesis Rodriguez, Afton Williamson, Robert Clohessy, Joe Lisi, Candice McKoy, Edward Burns, Johnny Solo, Titus Welliver, Elizabeth Banks, James Yaegashi, Daniel Sauli, Kyra Sedgwick, Frank Pando, jason Kolotouros, Michael Lee Laurence, Don Castro, Ed Harris, Pooja Kumar, John Dossett, Sylvia Kauders, Felix Solis, Jabari Gray, James Andrew O'Connor, Ann Arvia, Jonathan Walker, Liz Holtan, Jason Furlani, Terry Serpico, Erin Quill, Arthur J. nascarella, Jimmy Palumbo, J. Bernard Calloway, Gerry Vichi, Geoffrey Cantor, Brett G. Smith, John Comer, William Sadler, Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Jake Myers, David Ready, Mark Vahradian, Henry Jackman, Paul Cameron, Kevin Stitt, Deobrah Aquila, Ross Meyerson, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, David Swayze, Chryss Hionis, Susan Lyall, James K. Jensen, Lyn Pinezich, Andrew Saxe, G. A. Aguilar, Emma Barger, Marco Gonzalez Palma, Matthew Mason, Sore Miltich, David Wechsler, Adam Weisinger, Eric Yellin, Emily Beck, Chris Barnes, Bobby Beckles, Paul Borne, Jill Brown, Stephen Pope, Thomas Place, Braden Belmonte, Eli Aronoff, Sandy Holt, Ronen Gevint, Ron Barr, Chris Clad, Jack Dolman, Nick Adrian, Elise Aliberti, Ainsley Bartholomew, Daniel Booko, Lauren Butler, Andrew Cesana, Abby Coon, Steve Gilbaud, jamie Horwitz, Timothy Hodson, David Hsu, Molly Irwin, Melissa Kalbfus, Karen M.C. Kane, Ben Katz, Melissa Marlette, Jack McKenna, Abigail Nash, Greg Outcalt, James Parsons, Joseph Perron-Kozar, Tim Petryni, Linda Pianigiani, Ky Reeves, Bill Richards, Jason Richardson, Natasha Rivera, Buck P.B.D. Rodgers, Dee Schuka, Michael James 'Scotty' Scott, Alexis Page Smith, Carla Snowden, Lora Sorrentino, Michael Vastano, Claire Wiegand, Canella Williams, Leah Winkler, David Yoon

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Man on a Ledge, Asger Leth, Pablo F. Fenjves, Sam Worthington, Mandy Gonzalez, Barbara Marineau, J. Smith-Cameron, Anthony Mackie, Patrick Collins, Jamie Bell, Genesis Rodriguez, Afton Williamson, Robert Clohessy, Joe Lisi, Candice McKoy, Edward Burns, Johnny Solo, Titus Welliver, Elizabeth Banks, James Yaegashi, Daniel Sauli, Kyra Sedgwick, Frank Pando, jason Kolotouros, Michael Lee Laurence, Don Castro, Ed Harris, Pooja Kumar, John Dossett, Sylvia Kauders, Felix Solis, Jabari Gray, James Andrew O'Connor, Ann Arvia, Jonathan Walker, Liz Holtan, Jason Furlani, Terry Serpico, Erin Quill, Arthur J. nascarella, Jimmy Palumbo, J. Bernard Calloway, Gerry Vichi, Geoffrey Cantor, Brett G. Smith, John Comer, William Sadler, Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Jake Myers, David Ready, Mark Vahradian, Henry Jackman, Paul Cameron, Kevin Stitt, Deobrah Aquila, Ross Meyerson, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, David Swayze, Chryss Hionis, Susan Lyall, James K. Jensen, Lyn Pinezich, Andrew Saxe, G. A. Aguilar, Emma Barger, Marco Gonzalez Palma, Matthew Mason, Sore Miltich, David Wechsler, Adam Weisinger, Eric Yellin, Emily Beck, Chris Barnes, Bobby Beckles, Paul Borne, Jill Brown, Stephen Pope, Thomas Place, Braden Belmonte, Eli Aronoff, Sandy Holt, Ronen Gevint, Ron Barr, Chris Clad, Jack Dolman, Nick Adrian, Elise Aliberti, Ainsley Bartholomew, Daniel Booko, Lauren Butler, Andrew Cesana, Abby Coon, Steve Gilbaud, jamie Horwitz, Timothy Hodson, David Hsu, Molly Irwin, Melissa Kalbfus, Karen M.C. Kane, Ben Katz, Melissa Marlette, Jack McKenna, Abigail Nash, Greg Outcalt, James Parsons, Joseph Perron-Kozar, Tim Petryni, Linda Pianigiani, Ky Reeves, Bill Richards, Jason Richardson, Natasha Rivera, Buck P.B.D. Rodgers, Dee Schuka, Michael James 'Scotty' Scott, Alexis Page Smith, Carla Snowden, Lora Sorrentino, Michael Vastano, Claire Wiegand, Canella Williams, Leah Winkler, David YoonMan On A Ledge

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Action and adventure in January?

What is this film “Man on a Ledge”?

Is Hollywood sucking more smoky bong openings than film reviewers (ME!)?

Oh, my mind anticipates with wet quivering smart action fun.

Also smart.  But no.

July movie in January – but July/January movie has no boobs or explosions.  At least not like July movie.

This confusion haunts my brain-stem and makes thinking hurt.

Plot?  I think so.

Nick Cassidy (Sam Worthington) was once a successful and highly respected cop until one day he was arrested for a robbery he never committed (really?  This defense works as often as “Glee” makes sense).

As a cop, he also sits years later under difficult conditions in the prison where he has to defend his fellow prisoners in the first place.  Especially the soap dropping prisoners.  They need defending.  From rape.  In the butt.

Completely desperate, he uses the first available opportunity to escape and increases with an elaborate plan on the window ledge of a New York hotel (original!), where he soon gets the attention of passers-by and the police.

The police recognize him – because they’re smart.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Man on a Ledge, Asger Leth, Pablo F. Fenjves, Sam Worthington, Mandy Gonzalez, Barbara Marineau, J. Smith-Cameron, Anthony Mackie, Patrick Collins, Jamie Bell, Genesis Rodriguez, Afton Williamson, Robert Clohessy, Joe Lisi, Candice McKoy, Edward Burns, Johnny Solo, Titus Welliver, Elizabeth Banks, James Yaegashi, Daniel Sauli, Kyra Sedgwick, Frank Pando, jason Kolotouros, Michael Lee Laurence, Don Castro, Ed Harris, Pooja Kumar, John Dossett, Sylvia Kauders, Felix Solis, Jabari Gray, James Andrew O'Connor, Ann Arvia, Jonathan Walker, Liz Holtan, Jason Furlani, Terry Serpico, Erin Quill, Arthur J. nascarella, Jimmy Palumbo, J. Bernard Calloway, Gerry Vichi, Geoffrey Cantor, Brett G. Smith, John Comer, William Sadler, Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Jake Myers, David Ready, Mark Vahradian, Henry Jackman, Paul Cameron, Kevin Stitt, Deobrah Aquila, Ross Meyerson, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, David Swayze, Chryss Hionis, Susan Lyall, James K. Jensen, Lyn Pinezich, Andrew Saxe, G. A. Aguilar, Emma Barger, Marco Gonzalez Palma, Matthew Mason, Sore Miltich, David Wechsler, Adam Weisinger, Eric Yellin, Emily Beck, Chris Barnes, Bobby Beckles, Paul Borne, Jill Brown, Stephen Pope, Thomas Place, Braden Belmonte, Eli Aronoff, Sandy Holt, Ronen Gevint, Ron Barr, Chris Clad, Jack Dolman, Nick Adrian, Elise Aliberti, Ainsley Bartholomew, Daniel Booko, Lauren Butler, Andrew Cesana, Abby Coon, Steve Gilbaud, jamie Horwitz, Timothy Hodson, David Hsu, Molly Irwin, Melissa Kalbfus, Karen M.C. Kane, Ben Katz, Melissa Marlette, Jack McKenna, Abigail Nash, Greg Outcalt, James Parsons, Joseph Perron-Kozar, Tim Petryni, Linda Pianigiani, Ky Reeves, Bill Richards, Jason Richardson, Natasha Rivera, Buck P.B.D. Rodgers, Dee Schuka, Michael James 'Scotty' Scott, Alexis Page Smith, Carla Snowden, Lora Sorrentino, Michael Vastano, Claire Wiegand, Canella Williams, Leah Winkler, David YoonDuring his conversation with the psychologist Lydia Anderson (Elizabeth Banks) time trying to give, this is still for a second plan.

At the same time break his brother Joey (Jamie Bell) and his girlfriend Nina (Pooja Kumar) in the adjacent high-rise of the industrial David Englander (Ed Harris) to the allegedly stolen diamonds now really stealing.

While Nick is running (shuffling) out on the windowsill, the time begins not only the special police unit to be restless, but also those corrupt colleagues who were involved in the diamond robbery at the time.

Corrupt colleagues are the suck.

How far would a man go when he is accused wrongly and arrested for something he has never committed?

Well, out on a ledge – that’s for sure.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Kimmo Mustonenen, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Man on a Ledge, Asger Leth, Pablo F. Fenjves, Sam Worthington, Mandy Gonzalez, Barbara Marineau, J. Smith-Cameron, Anthony Mackie, Patrick Collins, Jamie Bell, Genesis Rodriguez, Afton Williamson, Robert Clohessy, Joe Lisi, Candice McKoy, Edward Burns, Johnny Solo, Titus Welliver, Elizabeth Banks, James Yaegashi, Daniel Sauli, Kyra Sedgwick, Frank Pando, jason Kolotouros, Michael Lee Laurence, Don Castro, Ed Harris, Pooja Kumar, John Dossett, Sylvia Kauders, Felix Solis, Jabari Gray, James Andrew O'Connor, Ann Arvia, Jonathan Walker, Liz Holtan, Jason Furlani, Terry Serpico, Erin Quill, Arthur J. nascarella, Jimmy Palumbo, J. Bernard Calloway, Gerry Vichi, Geoffrey Cantor, Brett G. Smith, John Comer, William Sadler, Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Jake Myers, David Ready, Mark Vahradian, Henry Jackman, Paul Cameron, Kevin Stitt, Deobrah Aquila, Ross Meyerson, Tricia Wood, Alec Hammond, David Swayze, Chryss Hionis, Susan Lyall, James K. Jensen, Lyn Pinezich, Andrew Saxe, G. A. Aguilar, Emma Barger, Marco Gonzalez Palma, Matthew Mason, Sore Miltich, David Wechsler, Adam Weisinger, Eric Yellin, Emily Beck, Chris Barnes, Bobby Beckles, Paul Borne, Jill Brown, Stephen Pope, Thomas Place, Braden Belmonte, Eli Aronoff, Sandy Holt, Ronen Gevint, Ron Barr, Chris Clad, Jack Dolman, Nick Adrian, Elise Aliberti, Ainsley Bartholomew, Daniel Booko, Lauren Butler, Andrew Cesana, Abby Coon, Steve Gilbaud, jamie Horwitz, Timothy Hodson, David Hsu, Molly Irwin, Melissa Kalbfus, Karen M.C. Kane, Ben Katz, Melissa Marlette, Jack McKenna, Abigail Nash, Greg Outcalt, James Parsons, Joseph Perron-Kozar, Tim Petryni, Linda Pianigiani, Ky Reeves, Bill Richards, Jason Richardson, Natasha Rivera, Buck P.B.D. Rodgers, Dee Schuka, Michael James 'Scotty' Scott, Alexis Page Smith, Carla Snowden, Lora Sorrentino, Michael Vastano, Claire Wiegand, Canella Williams, Leah Winkler, David YoonAnd then stand, and talk… and stand… and talk… action in other places, stand… then talk.

Then run!  On a ledge!

Son of a bitch – a man is on a ledge!

The marquee did not lie on me!

There is really a MAN ON A LEDGE!

The he gets off of it.

Other shit happens, too.

“Man on a Ledge” brings to fans of this genre, unfortunately, not much new with it.

While the cast – led by Elizabeth Banks and Sam Worthington – truly deliver a solid performance and blend together perfectly, the story still runs off to familiar patterns.

Maybe it should be then “Man In A Phone Booth”.  Because that has never been done.

Conclusion:  Wait until the lateness of March and rent.  It will please your eye orbs more on your cool HDTV and cheaper than cinema.  And you can make to fire up your pipe without old people (like mothballs and urine smell) telling you against lighting up.

Chill, old people.  Take a hit.  Your jello will never cover your tongue with more joy after the sweet, sweet smoke.

This I know.  Trust Kimmo.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  Stop NOW the reading of this!  Go see “The Artist”.  Go see “The Descendants”.  Maybe even “The Iron Giant’s Lady”.

Beware!  The summer film shit storm is on the horizon… and then the suck really starts.

Please Mayans – be right!

The Artist [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Artist, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, The Weinstein Company, Michel Hazanavicius, Jean Dujardin, Berenice Bejo, John Goodman, James Cromwell, Penelope Ann Miller, Missi Pyle, Beth Grant, Ed Lauter, Joel Murray, Bitsie Tulloch, Ken Davitian, Malcolm McDowell, Basil Hoffman, Bill Fagerbakke, Nina Siemaszko, Stephen Mendillo, Dash Pomerantz, Beau Nelson, Alex Holliday, Wiley M. Pickett, Ben Kurland, Katie Nisa, Katie Wallack, Hal Landon, Ccieto Augusto, Sarah Karges, Sarah Scott, Maize Olinger, Ezra Buzzington, Fred Bishop, Stuart Pankin, Andy Milder, Bob Glouberman, David Allen Cluck, Kristian Francis Falkenstein, Matt Skollar, Annie O'Donnell, Patrick Mapel, Matthew Albrect, Harvey J. Alperin, Lily Knight, Clement Blake, Tsso Feldman, Christopher Ashe, Adria Tennor, Cletus Young, M. Mark Donaldson, Brian Williams, Andrew Ross Wynn, Jen Lilley, Brian Chenoweth, Tim De Zam, Uggie, Niko NOvick, Joshua Capo, Pasquale Cassalia, Mohamed Dione, Kevin Michael Hoffman, Rose Murphy, Rene Napoli, Jewel Shepard, Ashley Lane Adams, David Bantly, Bill Blair, Ole Dupont, Josephine Ganner, Jillana Laufer, Josh Margulies, Philip Ongert, Geoff Pilkington, Jamie Preston, Andrew Schlessinger, John H. Tobin, Josh Woodle, Al Zimmer, Jeremy Burdek, Antoine de Cazotte, Daniel Delume, Nadia Khamlichi, Thomas Langmann, Richard Middleton, Emmanuel Montamat, Adrian Politowski, Gilles Waterkeyn, Ludovic Bource, Guillaume Schiffman, Anne-Sophie Bion, Heidi Levitt, Laurence Bennett, Gregory Hooper, Austin Buchinsky, Robert Gould, Mark Bridges, Cydney Cornell, Clarisse Domine, Kelcey Fry, Jenni Brown Greenberg, Zoe Hay, Julie Hewett, Adruitha Lee, Lydia Milars, Maha Saade, Lynn Tully, Angie Wells, Karen Zanki, Joy Zapata, Antoine de Cazotte, Segolene Fleury Slimane, Varujan Gumusel, Frank Mettre, Christina Lee Storm, James Canal, David Allen Cluck, Shadie Elnashai, David Paige, Lou Salome Piron, Richard Robinson, Karla Strum, Laura Albert, Michael Caradonna, Gary Davis, Jennifer Ann Henry, Nathan Lewis, Paul Black, Nigel Boyd, Richard Bernard, Frederic Dunis, Jerome Lateur, Laura Aldridge, Danielle Clark, Sarah Clifford, Mitch deQuilettes, Hec Elodie, Fred Fein, Alicia Gaynor, Anthony Hanna, Mike Hoover, Marie Christine Lafosse, Martin Metz, Nancy Ann Norton, David Albert Pierce, Griffin Pocock, Iwona Sellers, Fabien Ruiz, Bastien Sirodot, Johanna Silverman, Kris Smith, Laurie Stewart, John Tribken, Clay Valenti, Omar Von Muller, Lauren Wildeboer, Justin Wragg

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Artist, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, The Weinstein Company, Michel Hazanavicius, Jean Dujardin, Berenice Bejo, John Goodman, James Cromwell, Penelope Ann Miller, Missi Pyle, Beth Grant, Ed Lauter, Joel Murray, Bitsie Tulloch, Ken Davitian, Malcolm McDowell, Basil Hoffman, Bill Fagerbakke, Nina Siemaszko, Stephen Mendillo, Dash Pomerantz, Beau Nelson, Alex Holliday, Wiley M. Pickett, Ben Kurland, Katie Nisa, Katie Wallack, Hal Landon, Ccieto Augusto, Sarah Karges, Sarah Scott, Maize Olinger, Ezra Buzzington, Fred Bishop, Stuart Pankin, Andy Milder, Bob Glouberman, David Allen Cluck, Kristian Francis Falkenstein, Matt Skollar, Annie O'Donnell, Patrick Mapel, Matthew Albrect, Harvey J. Alperin, Lily Knight, Clement Blake, Tsso Feldman, Christopher Ashe, Adria Tennor, Cletus Young, M. Mark Donaldson, Brian Williams, Andrew Ross Wynn, Jen Lilley, Brian Chenoweth, Tim De Zam, Uggie, Niko NOvick, Joshua Capo, Pasquale Cassalia, Mohamed Dione, Kevin Michael Hoffman, Rose Murphy, Rene Napoli, Jewel Shepard, Ashley Lane Adams, David Bantly, Bill Blair, Ole Dupont, Josephine Ganner, Jillana Laufer, Josh Margulies, Philip Ongert, Geoff Pilkington, Jamie Preston, Andrew Schlessinger, John H. Tobin, Josh Woodle, Al Zimmer, Jeremy Burdek, Antoine de Cazotte, Daniel Delume, Nadia Khamlichi, Thomas Langmann, Richard Middleton, Emmanuel Montamat, Adrian Politowski, Gilles Waterkeyn, Ludovic Bource, Guillaume Schiffman, Anne-Sophie Bion, Heidi Levitt, Laurence Bennett, Gregory Hooper, Austin Buchinsky, Robert Gould, Mark Bridges, Cydney Cornell, Clarisse Domine, Kelcey Fry, Jenni Brown Greenberg, Zoe Hay, Julie Hewett, Adruitha Lee, Lydia Milars, Maha Saade, Lynn Tully, Angie Wells, Karen Zanki, Joy Zapata, Antoine de Cazotte, Segolene Fleury Slimane, Varujan Gumusel, Frank Mettre, Christina Lee Storm, James Canal, David Allen Cluck, Shadie Elnashai, David Paige, Lou Salome Piron, Richard Robinson, Karla Strum, Laura Albert, Michael Caradonna, Gary Davis, Jennifer Ann Henry, Nathan Lewis, Paul Black, Nigel Boyd, Richard Bernard, Frederic Dunis, Jerome Lateur, Laura Aldridge, Danielle Clark, Sarah Clifford, Mitch deQuilettes, Hec Elodie, Fred Fein, Alicia Gaynor, Anthony Hanna, Mike Hoover, Marie Christine Lafosse, Martin Metz, Nancy Ann Norton, David Albert Pierce, Griffin Pocock, Iwona Sellers, Fabien Ruiz, Bastien Sirodot, Johanna Silverman, Kris Smith, Laurie Stewart, John Tribken, Clay Valenti, Omar Von Muller, Lauren Wildeboer, Justin WraggThe Artist

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Confusion.

In the cinema.

Topped off with Kossu shots.

Warm.

Now for the reviewing the movie I see.

Then sick joke!

4:3 picture.  Black and white.  No talking.

WTF?!?

Elaborate joke on Kimmo?

Alcohol time travelling?

Heaven?

“The Artist” was not a joke on my head.  A gift.  From Hollywood.  Or France.

Thank you, Hollywood.  Or France.

I don’t care.  Just “THANK YOU!”

Plot?  Sure!

George Valentin (Jean Dujardin) is the big screen star of the late silent era.  In 1927 a photo gets on the front pages of the Hollywood press (pre-TMZ… yes, that time was in existence – Hi, Harvey!), on the charmer kisses an unidentified woman after a performance on the red carpet (I guess red – it was gray – like everything in the past).

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Artist, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, The Weinstein Company, Michel Hazanavicius, Jean Dujardin, Berenice Bejo, John Goodman, James Cromwell, Penelope Ann Miller, Missi Pyle, Beth Grant, Ed Lauter, Joel Murray, Bitsie Tulloch, Ken Davitian, Malcolm McDowell, Basil Hoffman, Bill Fagerbakke, Nina Siemaszko, Stephen Mendillo, Dash Pomerantz, Beau Nelson, Alex Holliday, Wiley M. Pickett, Ben Kurland, Katie Nisa, Katie Wallack, Hal Landon, Ccieto Augusto, Sarah Karges, Sarah Scott, Maize Olinger, Ezra Buzzington, Fred Bishop, Stuart Pankin, Andy Milder, Bob Glouberman, David Allen Cluck, Kristian Francis Falkenstein, Matt Skollar, Annie O'Donnell, Patrick Mapel, Matthew Albrect, Harvey J. Alperin, Lily Knight, Clement Blake, Tsso Feldman, Christopher Ashe, Adria Tennor, Cletus Young, M. Mark Donaldson, Brian Williams, Andrew Ross Wynn, Jen Lilley, Brian Chenoweth, Tim De Zam, Uggie, Niko NOvick, Joshua Capo, Pasquale Cassalia, Mohamed Dione, Kevin Michael Hoffman, Rose Murphy, Rene Napoli, Jewel Shepard, Ashley Lane Adams, David Bantly, Bill Blair, Ole Dupont, Josephine Ganner, Jillana Laufer, Josh Margulies, Philip Ongert, Geoff Pilkington, Jamie Preston, Andrew Schlessinger, John H. Tobin, Josh Woodle, Al Zimmer, Jeremy Burdek, Antoine de Cazotte, Daniel Delume, Nadia Khamlichi, Thomas Langmann, Richard Middleton, Emmanuel Montamat, Adrian Politowski, Gilles Waterkeyn, Ludovic Bource, Guillaume Schiffman, Anne-Sophie Bion, Heidi Levitt, Laurence Bennett, Gregory Hooper, Austin Buchinsky, Robert Gould, Mark Bridges, Cydney Cornell, Clarisse Domine, Kelcey Fry, Jenni Brown Greenberg, Zoe Hay, Julie Hewett, Adruitha Lee, Lydia Milars, Maha Saade, Lynn Tully, Angie Wells, Karen Zanki, Joy Zapata, Antoine de Cazotte, Segolene Fleury Slimane, Varujan Gumusel, Frank Mettre, Christina Lee Storm, James Canal, David Allen Cluck, Shadie Elnashai, David Paige, Lou Salome Piron, Richard Robinson, Karla Strum, Laura Albert, Michael Caradonna, Gary Davis, Jennifer Ann Henry, Nathan Lewis, Paul Black, Nigel Boyd, Richard Bernard, Frederic Dunis, Jerome Lateur, Laura Aldridge, Danielle Clark, Sarah Clifford, Mitch deQuilettes, Hec Elodie, Fred Fein, Alicia Gaynor, Anthony Hanna, Mike Hoover, Marie Christine Lafosse, Martin Metz, Nancy Ann Norton, David Albert Pierce, Griffin Pocock, Iwona Sellers, Fabien Ruiz, Bastien Sirodot, Johanna Silverman, Kris Smith, Laurie Stewart, John Tribken, Clay Valenti, Omar Von Muller, Lauren Wildeboer, Justin WraggPeppy Miller (Bérénice Bejo) is named the starlet who wants to make her fortune in Hollywood and soon afterwards met (with Valentin) as a dancer among many on the set.  Caught by her charm, the star for newcomer helps to a small role, oh yes he did.

Two years later, the demise of silent films was sealed.  Valentine stubbornly refuses to accept this, and produced his next silent film itself, he has the same day as the new sound film premiere, in which Miller plays Peppy (confusion – must start reading press kit), go and miserably at the box office.

Valentine withdraws depressed, drinks (my man!) and is exhibited by his wife before and through the door.  He must leave all his belongings auctioned off, and soon no one knows him (Uggie knows him – cleanly, you perverts!).

Only Peppy who has become the diva of the sound film entertains, continued feelings for him and tried to help him.  But his pride gets in the way of their love.

U2 saw this.  In the past.  Or in this case, the future.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Artist, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, The Weinstein Company, Michel Hazanavicius, Jean Dujardin, Berenice Bejo, John Goodman, James Cromwell, Penelope Ann Miller, Missi Pyle, Beth Grant, Ed Lauter, Joel Murray, Bitsie Tulloch, Ken Davitian, Malcolm McDowell, Basil Hoffman, Bill Fagerbakke, Nina Siemaszko, Stephen Mendillo, Dash Pomerantz, Beau Nelson, Alex Holliday, Wiley M. Pickett, Ben Kurland, Katie Nisa, Katie Wallack, Hal Landon, Ccieto Augusto, Sarah Karges, Sarah Scott, Maize Olinger, Ezra Buzzington, Fred Bishop, Stuart Pankin, Andy Milder, Bob Glouberman, David Allen Cluck, Kristian Francis Falkenstein, Matt Skollar, Annie O'Donnell, Patrick Mapel, Matthew Albrect, Harvey J. Alperin, Lily Knight, Clement Blake, Tsso Feldman, Christopher Ashe, Adria Tennor, Cletus Young, M. Mark Donaldson, Brian Williams, Andrew Ross Wynn, Jen Lilley, Brian Chenoweth, Tim De Zam, Uggie, Niko NOvick, Joshua Capo, Pasquale Cassalia, Mohamed Dione, Kevin Michael Hoffman, Rose Murphy, Rene Napoli, Jewel Shepard, Ashley Lane Adams, David Bantly, Bill Blair, Ole Dupont, Josephine Ganner, Jillana Laufer, Josh Margulies, Philip Ongert, Geoff Pilkington, Jamie Preston, Andrew Schlessinger, John H. Tobin, Josh Woodle, Al Zimmer, Jeremy Burdek, Antoine de Cazotte, Daniel Delume, Nadia Khamlichi, Thomas Langmann, Richard Middleton, Emmanuel Montamat, Adrian Politowski, Gilles Waterkeyn, Ludovic Bource, Guillaume Schiffman, Anne-Sophie Bion, Heidi Levitt, Laurence Bennett, Gregory Hooper, Austin Buchinsky, Robert Gould, Mark Bridges, Cydney Cornell, Clarisse Domine, Kelcey Fry, Jenni Brown Greenberg, Zoe Hay, Julie Hewett, Adruitha Lee, Lydia Milars, Maha Saade, Lynn Tully, Angie Wells, Karen Zanki, Joy Zapata, Antoine de Cazotte, Segolene Fleury Slimane, Varujan Gumusel, Frank Mettre, Christina Lee Storm, James Canal, David Allen Cluck, Shadie Elnashai, David Paige, Lou Salome Piron, Richard Robinson, Karla Strum, Laura Albert, Michael Caradonna, Gary Davis, Jennifer Ann Henry, Nathan Lewis, Paul Black, Nigel Boyd, Richard Bernard, Frederic Dunis, Jerome Lateur, Laura Aldridge, Danielle Clark, Sarah Clifford, Mitch deQuilettes, Hec Elodie, Fred Fein, Alicia Gaynor, Anthony Hanna, Mike Hoover, Marie Christine Lafosse, Martin Metz, Nancy Ann Norton, David Albert Pierce, Griffin Pocock, Iwona Sellers, Fabien Ruiz, Bastien Sirodot, Johanna Silverman, Kris Smith, Laurie Stewart, John Tribken, Clay Valenti, Omar Von Muller, Lauren Wildeboer, Justin WraggEnough plot.  Spoilers are not in this.  Yet.

Writer-director Michel Hazanavicius has dared to experiment, to swim against the stream (salmon!) and see if you still can make a silent film, which arrives at the audience.

With the elegant play of black and white film with light and shadow bathes the story in the Roaring Twenties, when the men still like tails (coats, not booty) and the women wore curly short hair and short dresses.

In 1927 George Valentine’s latest film, accompanied by a live orchestra, shown in a cinema that resembles an opera house.

Then the star interacts with its ubiquitous little dog Jack (Uggie – SAG award for the dog!  Now!!!) on stage to be feted by audiences  Jean Dujardin plays George Valentin, first as a light-footed charmer, a man who basks in the affection of his audience before he then almost at the abrupt end of his career break (see George Clooney and “Up In The Air Flying”).

Lots of music and the faithful little dog who is looking out for his master support, with Dujardin here to describe this inner drama effectively.

With the start of the new sound film era actor came out great on camera, here it is shown by Bérénice Bejo as Peppy Miller.  Her bigger than Jupiter (Jupiter?  The Sun!) eyes gives the whole story a fresh, even contemporary twist – and yank my heart chain.

She gave my area an expansion (totally).  Her film character has a sincere thing and does not rise to the success of her head, which was as successful as her body (my area, again).

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, The Artist, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, The Weinstein Company, Michel Hazanavicius, Jean Dujardin, Berenice Bejo, John Goodman, James Cromwell, Penelope Ann Miller, Missi Pyle, Beth Grant, Ed Lauter, Joel Murray, Bitsie Tulloch, Ken Davitian, Malcolm McDowell, Basil Hoffman, Bill Fagerbakke, Nina Siemaszko, Stephen Mendillo, Dash Pomerantz, Beau Nelson, Alex Holliday, Wiley M. Pickett, Ben Kurland, Katie Nisa, Katie Wallack, Hal Landon, Ccieto Augusto, Sarah Karges, Sarah Scott, Maize Olinger, Ezra Buzzington, Fred Bishop, Stuart Pankin, Andy Milder, Bob Glouberman, David Allen Cluck, Kristian Francis Falkenstein, Matt Skollar, Annie O'Donnell, Patrick Mapel, Matthew Albrect, Harvey J. Alperin, Lily Knight, Clement Blake, Tsso Feldman, Christopher Ashe, Adria Tennor, Cletus Young, M. Mark Donaldson, Brian Williams, Andrew Ross Wynn, Jen Lilley, Brian Chenoweth, Tim De Zam, Uggie, Niko NOvick, Joshua Capo, Pasquale Cassalia, Mohamed Dione, Kevin Michael Hoffman, Rose Murphy, Rene Napoli, Jewel Shepard, Ashley Lane Adams, David Bantly, Bill Blair, Ole Dupont, Josephine Ganner, Jillana Laufer, Josh Margulies, Philip Ongert, Geoff Pilkington, Jamie Preston, Andrew Schlessinger, John H. Tobin, Josh Woodle, Al Zimmer, Jeremy Burdek, Antoine de Cazotte, Daniel Delume, Nadia Khamlichi, Thomas Langmann, Richard Middleton, Emmanuel Montamat, Adrian Politowski, Gilles Waterkeyn, Ludovic Bource, Guillaume Schiffman, Anne-Sophie Bion, Heidi Levitt, Laurence Bennett, Gregory Hooper, Austin Buchinsky, Robert Gould, Mark Bridges, Cydney Cornell, Clarisse Domine, Kelcey Fry, Jenni Brown Greenberg, Zoe Hay, Julie Hewett, Adruitha Lee, Lydia Milars, Maha Saade, Lynn Tully, Angie Wells, Karen Zanki, Joy Zapata, Antoine de Cazotte, Segolene Fleury Slimane, Varujan Gumusel, Frank Mettre, Christina Lee Storm, James Canal, David Allen Cluck, Shadie Elnashai, David Paige, Lou Salome Piron, Richard Robinson, Karla Strum, Laura Albert, Michael Caradonna, Gary Davis, Jennifer Ann Henry, Nathan Lewis, Paul Black, Nigel Boyd, Richard Bernard, Frederic Dunis, Jerome Lateur, Laura Aldridge, Danielle Clark, Sarah Clifford, Mitch deQuilettes, Hec Elodie, Fred Fein, Alicia Gaynor, Anthony Hanna, Mike Hoover, Marie Christine Lafosse, Martin Metz, Nancy Ann Norton, David Albert Pierce, Griffin Pocock, Iwona Sellers, Fabien Ruiz, Bastien Sirodot, Johanna Silverman, Kris Smith, Laurie Stewart, John Tribken, Clay Valenti, Omar Von Muller, Lauren Wildeboer, Justin WraggAt the same time but she suffers because she can not find a way to get closer to the deep hurt in his pride Valentine.  In spite of the cardiac pain, which he describes, the film also maintains a comedic, upbeat tone.

There are places where one sees clearly amazing what people say at the moment, although we hear nothing of it – silent!  If only the “blue hairs” in row sitting behind me could stop their mouth flaps.

Talking in cinema should equal death.  Painful death.

Enough!

My thumbs strain to the heaven place, having seen, of the year, the best film!  I can review again!

Until the next “Transformers” or “Twilight” shit storm.  I promise to like movies until then, of course.

Bérénice Bejo?  Not just my thumbs strain sky-ward (dirty!).  Ginnifer Goodwin, you exist no longer.

I am ready for Bérénice to do the Humpty Dance.  On my thing.  But not silently, nor in black and white.  Loud, and with color.  Perfection.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  From “Shark Night 3D” to my television – Katharine McPhee!!!  Have I died?  Or finally Kossu madness?  Good feelings need no question answered.  Time for another shot.  And time to DVR “Smash.”

Coriolanus [REVIEW]

Manka Bros, Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Coriolanus, William Shakespeare, Ralph Fiennes, John Logan, Gerard Butler, Lubna Azabal, Ashraf Barhom, Zoron Cica, Milos Dabic, Nicolas Isia, Zoran Milijkovic, Marija Mogbolu, Milan Perovic, Nenad Ristic, Lawrence Stevenson, Marko Stojanovic, Tamara Krcunovic, Oliver Viktorovic, Danijela Vranjes, Brian Cox, Slavko Stimac, Ivan Djordjevic, Radovan Vujovic, Jovan Belobrkovic, John Kani, Dan Tana, Miodrag Milovanov, Dragan Miconovic, Radoslav Milenkovic, Radomir Nikolic, Zoran Pajic, Harry Fenn, Jessica Chastain, Vanessa Redgrave, Elizabeta Djorevska, Dusan Janicijevic, Paul Jesson, James Nesbitt, Jon Snow, David Yelland, Nikki Amuka-Bird, Andreja Maricic, Svetislav Goncic, Uros Zdjelar, Bora Nenic, Slobodan Ninkovic, Mona Hammond, Slobodan Pavelkic, Dragoljub Vojnov, Kieron Jecchinis, Mirko Pantelic, Carolyn Marks Blackwood, Christopher Figg, Lisa Jordan, Christine Langan, John Logan, Mark Miskovic, Alex Nikolic, Sivojin Petrovic, Gabrielle Tana, Julia Taylor-Stanley, Colin Vaines, Kevan Van Thompson, Andjelija Vlaisavjevic, Robert Whitehouse, Ilan Eshkeri, Barry Ackroyd, Nicolas Gaster, Danilo Beckovic, Jina Jay, Ricky Eyres, Lee Gordon, Bojana Nikitovic, Mark Coulier, Daniel Parker, Meg Clark, Miodrag Stevanovic, Aleksandar Tadic, Zoran Andric, Ljubomir Bozovic, Simon Downes, Nikola Ivanovic, Vesna Milic, Kevin Westley, Temple Clark, Ray McNeill, Ray Beckett, Rob Hughes, Luke Butler, Milan Alavanja, Rowley Irlam, Jaime Ackroyd, Shane Caim, Ameenah Ayub, Stuart Fyvie, Sharmila Kumar, Ellen Payne, Stephanie Jane Smith, Thomas Walters, Jessica Dannheisser, Slavko Novakovic, Milica Bregovic, Branka Cetina, Zoja Djordjevic, Sandra Djurickovic, Alix Graham, Ivan Grbin, Julia Hall, Sanja Ilic, Milan Kobali, Susanna Lenton, Nick McKinless, Debbie Moore, Masa Neskovic, Kate Penlington, Ceris Price, Andrew Semans, Marija Stojanovic, Joan Washington, Howard Watkins

Manka Bros, Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Coriolanus, William Shakespeare, Ralph Fiennes, John Logan, Gerard Butler, Lubna Azabal, Ashraf Barhom, Zoron Cica, Milos Dabic, Nicolas Isia, Zoran Milijkovic, Marija Mogbolu, Milan Perovic, Nenad Ristic, Lawrence Stevenson, Marko Stojanovic, Tamara Krcunovic, Oliver Viktorovic, Danijela Vranjes, Brian Cox, Slavko Stimac, Ivan Djordjevic, Radovan Vujovic, Jovan Belobrkovic, John Kani, Dan Tana, Miodrag Milovanov, Dragan Miconovic, Radoslav Milenkovic, Radomir Nikolic, Zoran Pajic, Harry Fenn, Jessica Chastain, Vanessa Redgrave, Elizabeta Djorevska, Dusan Janicijevic, Paul Jesson, James Nesbitt, Jon Snow, David Yelland, Nikki Amuka-Bird, Andreja Maricic, Svetislav Goncic, Uros Zdjelar, Bora Nenic, Slobodan Ninkovic, Mona Hammond, Slobodan Pavelkic, Dragoljub Vojnov, Kieron Jecchinis, Mirko Pantelic, Carolyn Marks Blackwood, Christopher Figg, Lisa Jordan, Christine Langan, John Logan, Mark Miskovic, Alex Nikolic, Sivojin Petrovic, Gabrielle Tana, Julia Taylor-Stanley, Colin Vaines, Kevan Van Thompson, Andjelija Vlaisavjevic, Robert Whitehouse, Ilan Eshkeri, Barry Ackroyd, Nicolas Gaster, Danilo Beckovic, Jina Jay, Ricky Eyres, Lee Gordon, Bojana Nikitovic, Mark Coulier, Daniel Parker, Meg Clark, Miodrag Stevanovic, Aleksandar Tadic, Zoran Andric, Ljubomir Bozovic, Simon Downes, Nikola Ivanovic, Vesna Milic, Kevin Westley, Temple Clark, Ray McNeill, Ray Beckett, Rob Hughes, Luke Butler, Milan Alavanja, Rowley Irlam, Jaime Ackroyd, Shane Caim, Ameenah Ayub, Stuart Fyvie, Sharmila Kumar, Ellen Payne, Stephanie Jane Smith, Thomas Walters, Jessica Dannheisser, Slavko Novakovic, Milica Bregovic, Branka Cetina, Zoja Djordjevic, Sandra Djurickovic, Alix Graham, Ivan Grbin, Julia Hall, Sanja Ilic, Milan Kobali, Susanna Lenton, Nick McKinless, Debbie Moore, Masa Neskovic, Kate Penlington, Ceris Price, Andrew Semans, Marija Stojanovic, Joan Washington, Howard WatkinsCoriolanus

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

What?

Not 100% CGI?

No robot alien things?

Am I high (yes, I am)?

Then soldiers.  My brain screams – You are within the stuck times of “Battle: Los Angeles!”

The worst of fates that mine could be… to have.

But no.

Winter’s cold has made me for to shrivel (in my man place).

Summer is for the confrontation of the ear (and mind – or mindlessness).

Now is for brain flexing cinema.

Thanks, Odin.

Plot?  Sure!

An angry crowd in a clean-rehearsed choreography calls for bread of the armed military men guarding a bread factory (which makes bread).

A squad of soldiers with heavy artillery and camouflage uniforms (sharp!) stormed a housing estate and speaks in blank verse.

Manka Bros, Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Coriolanus, William Shakespeare, Ralph Fiennes, John Logan, Gerard Butler, Lubna Azabal, Ashraf Barhom, Zoron Cica, Milos Dabic, Nicolas Isia, Zoran Milijkovic, Marija Mogbolu, Milan Perovic, Nenad Ristic, Lawrence Stevenson, Marko Stojanovic, Tamara Krcunovic, Oliver Viktorovic, Danijela Vranjes, Brian Cox, Slavko Stimac, Ivan Djordjevic, Radovan Vujovic, Jovan Belobrkovic, John Kani, Dan Tana, Miodrag Milovanov, Dragan Miconovic, Radoslav Milenkovic, Radomir Nikolic, Zoran Pajic, Harry Fenn, Jessica Chastain, Vanessa Redgrave, Elizabeta Djorevska, Dusan Janicijevic, Paul Jesson, James Nesbitt, Jon Snow, David Yelland, Nikki Amuka-Bird, Andreja Maricic, Svetislav Goncic, Uros Zdjelar, Bora Nenic, Slobodan Ninkovic, Mona Hammond, Slobodan Pavelkic, Dragoljub Vojnov, Kieron Jecchinis, Mirko Pantelic, Carolyn Marks Blackwood, Christopher Figg, Lisa Jordan, Christine Langan, John Logan, Mark Miskovic, Alex Nikolic, Sivojin Petrovic, Gabrielle Tana, Julia Taylor-Stanley, Colin Vaines, Kevan Van Thompson, Andjelija Vlaisavjevic, Robert Whitehouse, Ilan Eshkeri, Barry Ackroyd, Nicolas Gaster, Danilo Beckovic, Jina Jay, Ricky Eyres, Lee Gordon, Bojana Nikitovic, Mark Coulier, Daniel Parker, Meg Clark, Miodrag Stevanovic, Aleksandar Tadic, Zoran Andric, Ljubomir Bozovic, Simon Downes, Nikola Ivanovic, Vesna Milic, Kevin Westley, Temple Clark, Ray McNeill, Ray Beckett, Rob Hughes, Luke Butler, Milan Alavanja, Rowley Irlam, Jaime Ackroyd, Shane Caim, Ameenah Ayub, Stuart Fyvie, Sharmila Kumar, Ellen Payne, Stephanie Jane Smith, Thomas Walters, Jessica Dannheisser, Slavko Novakovic, Milica Bregovic, Branka Cetina, Zoja Djordjevic, Sandra Djurickovic, Alix Graham, Ivan Grbin, Julia Hall, Sanja Ilic, Milan Kobali, Susanna Lenton, Nick McKinless, Debbie Moore, Masa Neskovic, Kate Penlington, Ceris Price, Andrew Semans, Marija Stojanovic, Joan Washington, Howard WatkinsShakespeare meets Balkan war – Ralph Fiennes directorial debut “Coriolanus” (heh, anus) transports the Elizabethan drama in the time and now it is dead right.

Massive, violent and bloody, this film – and psychologically subtle and finely worked, not least thanks to the wonderful language of William Shakespeare (he speaks of English from his mouth-place worse than I – lucky for the press kit or in the wilderness my thoughts were straying).

Fiennes, who plays Coriolanus, the excellent and very nuanced itself, and especially Vanessa Redgrave as the mother of the hero know the language to use (English, but still not right – I still confuse my own thoughts) – but even the minor characters are occupied very solid.

How alive do these lines, the power and magic in the age-old phrases is, if only the right people interpret it (I pretend that it made sense to me – clever)!

Manka Bros, Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo On Kino, Coriolanus, William Shakespeare, Ralph Fiennes, John Logan, Gerard Butler, Lubna Azabal, Ashraf Barhom, Zoron Cica, Milos Dabic, Nicolas Isia, Zoran Milijkovic, Marija Mogbolu, Milan Perovic, Nenad Ristic, Lawrence Stevenson, Marko Stojanovic, Tamara Krcunovic, Oliver Viktorovic, Danijela Vranjes, Brian Cox, Slavko Stimac, Ivan Djordjevic, Radovan Vujovic, Jovan Belobrkovic, John Kani, Dan Tana, Miodrag Milovanov, Dragan Miconovic, Radoslav Milenkovic, Radomir Nikolic, Zoran Pajic, Harry Fenn, Jessica Chastain, Vanessa Redgrave, Elizabeta Djorevska, Dusan Janicijevic, Paul Jesson, James Nesbitt, Jon Snow, David Yelland, Nikki Amuka-Bird, Andreja Maricic, Svetislav Goncic, Uros Zdjelar, Bora Nenic, Slobodan Ninkovic, Mona Hammond, Slobodan Pavelkic, Dragoljub Vojnov, Kieron Jecchinis, Mirko Pantelic, Carolyn Marks Blackwood, Christopher Figg, Lisa Jordan, Christine Langan, John Logan, Mark Miskovic, Alex Nikolic, Sivojin Petrovic, Gabrielle Tana, Julia Taylor-Stanley, Colin Vaines, Kevan Van Thompson, Andjelija Vlaisavjevic, Robert Whitehouse, Ilan Eshkeri, Barry Ackroyd, Nicolas Gaster, Danilo Beckovic, Jina Jay, Ricky Eyres, Lee Gordon, Bojana Nikitovic, Mark Coulier, Daniel Parker, Meg Clark, Miodrag Stevanovic, Aleksandar Tadic, Zoran Andric, Ljubomir Bozovic, Simon Downes, Nikola Ivanovic, Vesna Milic, Kevin Westley, Temple Clark, Ray McNeill, Ray Beckett, Rob Hughes, Luke Butler, Milan Alavanja, Rowley Irlam, Jaime Ackroyd, Shane Caim, Ameenah Ayub, Stuart Fyvie, Sharmila Kumar, Ellen Payne, Stephanie Jane Smith, Thomas Walters, Jessica Dannheisser, Slavko Novakovic, Milica Bregovic, Branka Cetina, Zoja Djordjevic, Sandra Djurickovic, Alix Graham, Ivan Grbin, Julia Hall, Sanja Ilic, Milan Kobali, Susanna Lenton, Nick McKinless, Debbie Moore, Masa Neskovic, Kate Penlington, Ceris Price, Andrew Semans, Marija Stojanovic, Joan Washington, Howard WatkinsIn the past, some directors have transported Shakespeare to the present day (or yesterday – confusion remains) – and usually the result was at least interesting.

Fiennes has landed “Coriolanus” a really big throw.  Yes – THROW!

The story is told quickly: the Romans wage war against the Volscians (but not the same Volscians from “Star Trek”) – Coriolanus (heh), the Roman commander gains a bloody victory and to be in gratitude for consul.

Unfortunately, this little man of war, civil fine sense (? – what the hell, I will stop drinking), the common people is repugnant to him (they should bathe more often).  Thus arises as soon opposed his appointment and must Coriolanus into exile.

Here he teams up with former arch-enemy, the leader of the Volscians (Gerald Butler, not Leonard Nimoy – disappoint), and moves with him to Rome.

The insanity of war and the inability of a soldier to survive in peace, are the pillars of this tragic drama.  But the dialectic of hatred and admiration to homoerotic (no judgment) undertones between the two antagonists provides an additional voltage level (electric!).

Conclusion:  Two thumbs yelling “Yippee!  I’m not in the childish shit wallowing!” 

Warning – this will involve your thinking brain.  And your hearing ears.  It is not shit.  This is for brain-flexing.  Sweet, sweet relief!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  Speaking of Star Trek Volscians, I must a joke:

How is the U.S.S. Enterprise like a wad of toilet paper?

They both wipe out Klingons around Uranus.

Or your Coriol-anus.

I laugh at this still.

The Iron Lady [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Iron Lady, movie review, Phyllida Lloyd, Abi Morgan, Meryl Streep, Jim Broadbent, Susan Brown, Alice de Cunha, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Iain Glen, Alexandra Roach, Victoria Bewick, Emma Dewhurst, Olivia Colman, Harry Lloyd, Sylvestra Le Touzel, Michael Culkin, Stephanie Jacob, Robert Portal, Richard Dixon, Amanda Root, Clifford Rose, Michael Cochrane, Jeremy Clyde, Michael Simkins, Eloise Webb, Alexander Beardsley, Nicholas Farrell, John Sessions, Anthony Head, Richard Syms, David Westhead, Julian Wadham, Richard E Grant, Angus Wright, Roger Allam, Michael Pennington, John Harding, Simon Chandler, Stephen Boxer, Jasper jacob, Rupert Vansittart, Robin Kermode, Andrew Havill, Michael Elwyn, Peter Pacey, Jeremy Child, james Smith, Hugh Ross, Chris Campbell, Paul Bentley, Martin Wimbush, Simon Slater, David Cann, Christopher Luscombe, Angela Curran, Michael maloney, Pip Torrens, Nick Dunning, David Rintoul, Nicholas Jones, Richard Goulding, Matthew Marsh, Willie Jonah, Ronald Reagan, Francois Ivernel, Damian Jones, Adam Kulick, Cameron McCracken, Anita Overland, Tessa Ross, Colleen Woodcock, Thomas Newman, Elliot Davis, Justine Wright, Nina Gold, Simon Elliott, Bill Crutcher, Nick Dent, Consolata Boyle, Mark Coulier, Richard Glass, Bobby Prince, Michael Solinger, Sarah Wheale, James Wakefield, Charlie Reed, Guy Heeley, Clare Glass, Chris Foggin, Alex Bailey, Simon Baker, Alasdair Boyce, Rob Duffield, Rob Farris, Simon Jones, Marie Dong, Fiona Garland, Jon Croker, Michael Mann, Rebecca Pearson, Bradley Porter, Helen Swanwick, Helen Varty, Noelle Volpintesta, Juan Carlos Alvarez Vasquez, Luke Clare

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Iron Lady, movie review, Phyllida Lloyd, Abi Morgan, Meryl Streep, Jim Broadbent, Susan Brown, Alice de Cunha, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Iain Glen, Alexandra Roach, Victoria Bewick, Emma Dewhurst, Olivia Colman, Harry Lloyd, Sylvestra Le Touzel, Michael Culkin, Stephanie Jacob, Robert Portal, Richard Dixon, Amanda Root, Clifford Rose, Michael Cochrane, Jeremy Clyde, Michael Simkins, Eloise Webb, Alexander Beardsley, Nicholas Farrell, John Sessions, Anthony Head, Richard Syms, David Westhead, Julian Wadham, Richard E Grant, Angus Wright, Roger Allam, Michael Pennington, John Harding, Simon Chandler, Stephen Boxer, Jasper jacob, Rupert Vansittart, Robin Kermode, Andrew Havill, Michael Elwyn, Peter Pacey, Jeremy Child, james Smith, Hugh Ross, Chris Campbell, Paul Bentley, Martin Wimbush, Simon Slater, David Cann, Christopher Luscombe, Angela Curran, Michael maloney, Pip Torrens, Nick Dunning, David Rintoul, Nicholas Jones, Richard Goulding, Matthew Marsh, Willie Jonah, Ronald Reagan, Francois Ivernel, Damian Jones, Adam Kulick, Cameron McCracken, Anita Overland, Tessa Ross, Colleen Woodcock, Thomas Newman, Elliot Davis, Justine Wright, Nina Gold, Simon Elliott, Bill Crutcher, Nick Dent, Consolata Boyle, Mark Coulier, Richard Glass, Bobby Prince, Michael Solinger, Sarah Wheale, James Wakefield, Charlie Reed, Guy Heeley, Clare Glass, Chris Foggin, Alex Bailey, Simon Baker, Alasdair Boyce, Rob Duffield, Rob Farris, Simon Jones, Marie Dong, Fiona Garland, Jon Croker, Michael Mann, Rebecca Pearson, Bradley Porter, Helen Swanwick, Helen Varty, Noelle Volpintesta, Juan Carlos Alvarez Vasquez, Luke ClareThe Iron Lady

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

WTF?!?

My mind is a stream of mud.

Confusion.  Weed.  Not reading the press kit.

“The Iron Lady” is not a sequel to “The Iron Giant”.

The excitement made my area hurt.

Meryl Streep vs. Vin Diesel was my dream.  Movie heaven.

My confusion was a basket on my thinking brain.

Or perhaps they would love one another.

Sadly, no.

Then, my brain makes smart.

“The Iron Lady” is the love interest for “Iron Man” (who was not worthy of a “The” before his name).  Like the booty call for “The Six Million Dollar Man”, Jaime Sommers.

Before I could proclaim this out of my mouth hole I realize that I’m the wrong guy – again.

She had no damn super powers – unless ugly qualifies, Margaret Thatcher.  Fug.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Iron Lady, movie review, Phyllida Lloyd, Abi Morgan, Meryl Streep, Jim Broadbent, Susan Brown, Alice de Cunha, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Iain Glen, Alexandra Roach, Victoria Bewick, Emma Dewhurst, Olivia Colman, Harry Lloyd, Sylvestra Le Touzel, Michael Culkin, Stephanie Jacob, Robert Portal, Richard Dixon, Amanda Root, Clifford Rose, Michael Cochrane, Jeremy Clyde, Michael Simkins, Eloise Webb, Alexander Beardsley, Nicholas Farrell, John Sessions, Anthony Head, Richard Syms, David Westhead, Julian Wadham, Richard E Grant, Angus Wright, Roger Allam, Michael Pennington, John Harding, Simon Chandler, Stephen Boxer, Jasper jacob, Rupert Vansittart, Robin Kermode, Andrew Havill, Michael Elwyn, Peter Pacey, Jeremy Child, james Smith, Hugh Ross, Chris Campbell, Paul Bentley, Martin Wimbush, Simon Slater, David Cann, Christopher Luscombe, Angela Curran, Michael maloney, Pip Torrens, Nick Dunning, David Rintoul, Nicholas Jones, Richard Goulding, Matthew Marsh, Willie Jonah, Ronald Reagan, Francois Ivernel, Damian Jones, Adam Kulick, Cameron McCracken, Anita Overland, Tessa Ross, Colleen Woodcock, Thomas Newman, Elliot Davis, Justine Wright, Nina Gold, Simon Elliott, Bill Crutcher, Nick Dent, Consolata Boyle, Mark Coulier, Richard Glass, Bobby Prince, Michael Solinger, Sarah Wheale, James Wakefield, Charlie Reed, Guy Heeley, Clare Glass, Chris Foggin, Alex Bailey, Simon Baker, Alasdair Boyce, Rob Duffield, Rob Farris, Simon Jones, Marie Dong, Fiona Garland, Jon Croker, Michael Mann, Rebecca Pearson, Bradley Porter, Helen Swanwick, Helen Varty, Noelle Volpintesta, Juan Carlos Alvarez Vasquez, Luke ClareThe movie is about a bitch.

Plot?  There isn’t one.

Apparently, there was a man-woman from England.  She was ugly.  People noticed the non-prettiness of her face (and body – come on people!).

She decided to be a better man than a man.

And she succeeded.  As a man.  Or “better-man.”

This is messing with my mind stem.  But she succeeded.

You can tell a lot about the person Thatcher, but she was polarizing anyway.

Conservatives worldwide feasted her dislike of compromise and the welfare state, privatization and its war against Argentina and union leaders, people on the left of the political spectrum abhorred her breakdown of social services and the apparently uncritical embrace of neo-liberalism.

WTF?!?

So – people must die for stupid islands (Falklands… history!!!).  Anyone who is not of the wealth is shit.

Reagan has a big dick.

All of this is said through time traveling flashbacks.  Thank Odin for these, or some shit storytellers could not a story make.

Seriously.  Think J.J. Abrams.  Fucker.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind the Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, The Iron Lady, movie review, Phyllida Lloyd, Abi Morgan, Meryl Streep, Jim Broadbent, Susan Brown, Alice de Cunha, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Iain Glen, Alexandra Roach, Victoria Bewick, Emma Dewhurst, Olivia Colman, Harry Lloyd, Sylvestra Le Touzel, Michael Culkin, Stephanie Jacob, Robert Portal, Richard Dixon, Amanda Root, Clifford Rose, Michael Cochrane, Jeremy Clyde, Michael Simkins, Eloise Webb, Alexander Beardsley, Nicholas Farrell, John Sessions, Anthony Head, Richard Syms, David Westhead, Julian Wadham, Richard E Grant, Angus Wright, Roger Allam, Michael Pennington, John Harding, Simon Chandler, Stephen Boxer, Jasper jacob, Rupert Vansittart, Robin Kermode, Andrew Havill, Michael Elwyn, Peter Pacey, Jeremy Child, james Smith, Hugh Ross, Chris Campbell, Paul Bentley, Martin Wimbush, Simon Slater, David Cann, Christopher Luscombe, Angela Curran, Michael maloney, Pip Torrens, Nick Dunning, David Rintoul, Nicholas Jones, Richard Goulding, Matthew Marsh, Willie Jonah, Ronald Reagan, Francois Ivernel, Damian Jones, Adam Kulick, Cameron McCracken, Anita Overland, Tessa Ross, Colleen Woodcock, Thomas Newman, Elliot Davis, Justine Wright, Nina Gold, Simon Elliott, Bill Crutcher, Nick Dent, Consolata Boyle, Mark Coulier, Richard Glass, Bobby Prince, Michael Solinger, Sarah Wheale, James Wakefield, Charlie Reed, Guy Heeley, Clare Glass, Chris Foggin, Alex Bailey, Simon Baker, Alasdair Boyce, Rob Duffield, Rob Farris, Simon Jones, Marie Dong, Fiona Garland, Jon Croker, Michael Mann, Rebecca Pearson, Bradley Porter, Helen Swanwick, Helen Varty, Noelle Volpintesta, Juan Carlos Alvarez Vasquez, Luke ClareMeryl Streep is damn good.  I felt the Queen Mary had re-opened in Studio City.  There can never be too much of a drag queen.  And although Streep is a dude, I totally believed.

Awards for cross-dressing?!?  19 for Mr. Streep for “The Iron Giant’s Lady” alone.

Where am I?

So, for political, what does this rate?

I have no idea.  “The Ides Of March” was bleh.

“J. Edgar” was a sausage fest.

Why didn’t I get to review “My Week With Marilyn”Kenneth Branagh was twice the man in there (and I mean “in there”) than Meryl Streep will ever be.

Fight the power!  Get the shit you have together people!  Fight “The Iron Lady”!

http://www.iww.org/

Margaret Thatcher?  Fuck that bitch:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JChuUgio_8g

Khan Manka!  Pay me my money!  An injury to one is an injury to all!!!!!

Damn… I’m drunk.

And I’m probably fired.  Khan, I can’t wait to review “Contraband”!  Really!!!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  Is anybody there?  Does anybody care?  Does anybody see what I see?

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, David Fincher, Steven Zaillian, Stieg Larsson, Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara, Christopher Plummer, Stellan Skarsgard, Steven Berkoff, Robin Wright, Yorick Van Wageningen, Joely Richardson, Geraldine James, Goran Visnjic, Donald Sumpter, Ulf Friberg, Bengt C.W. Carlsson, Tony Way, Per Myrberg, Josefin Asplund, Eva Fritjofson, Moa Garpendal, Maya Hansson-Berggvist, Sarah Appelberg, Julian Sands, Anna Bjork, Gustaf Hammarstein, Simon Reithner, David Dencik, Marcus Johansson, Mathilda Von Essen, Mathias Palmer, Martin Jarvis, Inga Landgre, Reza Dehban, Anders Berg, Mats Andersson, Anders Jansson, Jurgen Klein, Kalle Josephson, Sandra Andreis, Arly Jover, Pierre Sjo Ostergren, Tess Panzer, Alastair Duncan, Alan Dale, Julia Rose, Peter Carlberg, Jan Abramson, Lena Stromdahl, Matthew Wolf, Anne-Li Norberg, Leo Bill, Albrecht Marco, Martina Lotun, Anna Carlson, Yvonne Astrand, Fredrik Dolk, Christian Heller, Werner Biermeier, Christine Adams, Peter Hottinger, Joyce Giraud, Bengt Wallgren, Elodie Yung, Anna Charlotta Gunnarson, Andreas Bjorklund, Embeth Davidtz, Joel Kinnaman, Karen E. Wright, Leah Harshaw, George Gerdes, Cean Chaffin, Anni Faurbye Fernandez, Malte Forssell, Ryan Kavanaugh, Berna Levin, Scott Rudin, Soren Staermose, Ole Sondberg, Mikael Wallen, Steven Zaillian, Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross, Jeff Cronenweth, Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall, Laray Mayfield, Donald Graham Burt, Frida Arvidsson, K.C. Fox, Lara Baldwin, Christos Dervenis, Eirik Ohna, Daniel Stillman, Florian Engelhardt, Allen Kupetsky, Bob Wagner, Pete Waterman, Maileen Williams, Holiday Landa, Thom Brennan, Alyson Dee Moore, Richard Quinn, JOhn Roesch, Toddy Bryant, Jeff Chumas, Ben Cooke, Jacob Dewitt, Per Dunder, Patty Majorczak-Connolly, Mark Sussman, Jola Wieczorek, Paul Alderman, Tyler Nelson, Alex Olivares, Kimberly Aguirre, Garrett Basch, Ulf Bjorlin, Bettina Browne, Veronika Eriksson, Desirae Ferrer, Astrid Hammarsten, Elinor Isenberg, Caroline Johansson, Suzanne Lehfeldt, Gareth Lewis, Larry Madrid, Andrea McKee, Kyle McGatlin, Catherine Pittman, Susanna Same, Candice Taylor, Rasmus Wassberg

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, David Fincher, Steven Zaillian, Stieg Larsson, Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara, Christopher Plummer, Stellan Skarsgard, Steven Berkoff, Robin Wright, Yorick Van Wageningen, Joely Richardson, Geraldine James, Goran Visnjic, Donald Sumpter, Ulf Friberg, Bengt C.W. Carlsson, Tony Way, Per Myrberg, Josefin Asplund, Eva Fritjofson, Moa Garpendal, Maya Hansson-Berggvist, Sarah Appelberg, Julian Sands, Anna Bjork, Gustaf Hammarstein, Simon Reithner, David Dencik, Marcus Johansson, Mathilda Von Essen, Mathias Palmer, Martin Jarvis, Inga Landgre, Reza Dehban, Anders Berg, Mats Andersson, Anders Jansson, Jurgen Klein, Kalle Josephson, Sandra Andreis, Arly Jover, Pierre Sjo Ostergren, Tess Panzer, Alastair Duncan, Alan Dale, Julia Rose, Peter Carlberg, Jan Abramson, Lena Stromdahl, Matthew Wolf, Anne-Li Norberg, Leo Bill, Albrecht Marco, Martina Lotun, Anna Carlson, Yvonne Astrand, Fredrik Dolk, Christian Heller, Werner Biermeier, Christine Adams, Peter Hottinger, Joyce Giraud, Bengt Wallgren, Elodie Yung, Anna Charlotta Gunnarson, Andreas Bjorklund, Embeth Davidtz, Joel Kinnaman, Karen E. Wright, Leah Harshaw, George Gerdes, Cean Chaffin, Anni Faurbye Fernandez, Malte Forssell, Ryan Kavanaugh, Berna Levin, Scott Rudin, Soren Staermose, Ole Sondberg, Mikael Wallen, Steven Zaillian, Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross, Jeff Cronenweth, Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall, Laray Mayfield, Donald Graham Burt, Frida Arvidsson, K.C. Fox, Lara Baldwin, Christos Dervenis, Eirik Ohna, Daniel Stillman, Florian Engelhardt, Allen Kupetsky, Bob Wagner, Pete Waterman, Maileen Williams, Holiday Landa, Thom Brennan, Alyson Dee Moore, Richard Quinn, JOhn Roesch, Toddy Bryant, Jeff Chumas, Ben Cooke, Jacob Dewitt, Per Dunder, Patty Majorczak-Connolly, Mark Sussman, Jola Wieczorek, Paul Alderman, Tyler Nelson, Alex Olivares, Kimberly Aguirre, Garrett Basch, Ulf Bjorlin, Bettina Browne, Veronika Eriksson, Desirae Ferrer, Astrid Hammarsten, Elinor Isenberg, Caroline Johansson, Suzanne Lehfeldt, Gareth Lewis, Larry Madrid, Andrea McKee, Kyle McGatlin, Catherine Pittman, Susanna Same, Candice Taylor, Rasmus WassbergThe Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Sweden.

Bastards.

While us, the Finns, fought Soviet Russia the Swedes ate butter, fish, and those damn crap meatballs.

In same war (World War II, retards) we fight and fight.

Sweden?

Neutral (sissy Nazi lovers – take that, Swedes!).

Finns are awesomeness.

Swedes?

They had not one ball between them.

Then I see those Swede bastards again.

Swedish Bikini Team (hot).  SAAB (cool).  Malin Akerman (schwing!).  Swedes aren’t so bad as people as my mind said.

They also gave us “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.”  And it was greater than good.

For a film

Then, excited tail wagging puppy-like excitement sprouts from David Fincher.  “Give me this movie!” he may have said out loud.  And since excitement of so throbbing Swedish version is from Stone Age 2009 – of course Hollywood said “fuck yeah!  2009 is so 2009!”

Now we have “The Same Girl With A Dragon Tattoo Who Now Speaks English.”  With accent that has previously been unheard by humans.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, David Fincher, Steven Zaillian, Stieg Larsson, Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara, Christopher Plummer, Stellan Skarsgard, Steven Berkoff, Robin Wright, Yorick Van Wageningen, Joely Richardson, Geraldine James, Goran Visnjic, Donald Sumpter, Ulf Friberg, Bengt C.W. Carlsson, Tony Way, Per Myrberg, Josefin Asplund, Eva Fritjofson, Moa Garpendal, Maya Hansson-Berggvist, Sarah Appelberg, Julian Sands, Anna Bjork, Gustaf Hammarstein, Simon Reithner, David Dencik, Marcus Johansson, Mathilda Von Essen, Mathias Palmer, Martin Jarvis, Inga Landgre, Reza Dehban, Anders Berg, Mats Andersson, Anders Jansson, Jurgen Klein, Kalle Josephson, Sandra Andreis, Arly Jover, Pierre Sjo Ostergren, Tess Panzer, Alastair Duncan, Alan Dale, Julia Rose, Peter Carlberg, Jan Abramson, Lena Stromdahl, Matthew Wolf, Anne-Li Norberg, Leo Bill, Albrecht Marco, Martina Lotun, Anna Carlson, Yvonne Astrand, Fredrik Dolk, Christian Heller, Werner Biermeier, Christine Adams, Peter Hottinger, Joyce Giraud, Bengt Wallgren, Elodie Yung, Anna Charlotta Gunnarson, Andreas Bjorklund, Embeth Davidtz, Joel Kinnaman, Karen E. Wright, Leah Harshaw, George Gerdes, Cean Chaffin, Anni Faurbye Fernandez, Malte Forssell, Ryan Kavanaugh, Berna Levin, Scott Rudin, Soren Staermose, Ole Sondberg, Mikael Wallen, Steven Zaillian, Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross, Jeff Cronenweth, Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall, Laray Mayfield, Donald Graham Burt, Frida Arvidsson, K.C. Fox, Lara Baldwin, Christos Dervenis, Eirik Ohna, Daniel Stillman, Florian Engelhardt, Allen Kupetsky, Bob Wagner, Pete Waterman, Maileen Williams, Holiday Landa, Thom Brennan, Alyson Dee Moore, Richard Quinn, JOhn Roesch, Toddy Bryant, Jeff Chumas, Ben Cooke, Jacob Dewitt, Per Dunder, Patty Majorczak-Connolly, Mark Sussman, Jola Wieczorek, Paul Alderman, Tyler Nelson, Alex Olivares, Kimberly Aguirre, Garrett Basch, Ulf Bjorlin, Bettina Browne, Veronika Eriksson, Desirae Ferrer, Astrid Hammarsten, Elinor Isenberg, Caroline Johansson, Suzanne Lehfeldt, Gareth Lewis, Larry Madrid, Andrea McKee, Kyle McGatlin, Catherine Pittman, Susanna Same, Candice Taylor, Rasmus WassbergPlot?  Sure!

Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig) is a business investigative journalist who is determined to restore his honor.

Once he has been convicted of libel, joins the rich industrial Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer) in order to use his services as a journalist and a detective in the claim.

Henrik’s niece Harriet was murdered in 1966 as a 16 year old girl, what could have been but never proven (since Sherlock Holmes services are being used in shit cinema elsewhere).

Since then, the only message is that Henrik’s once a year receives a dried flower of the alleged murderer (in a frame, as in “framed”… a clue?).

Center of this conspiracy is Henrik’s extended family, from the loud disputes among themselves hardly changed a word. Like Thanksgiving at Kyrle’s place.

Americans are gluttons.

And very opinionated.

And cannot hold their liquor.

At least Swedes can hold their liquor.

And I can hold Malin Akerman (please Malin, we could make all of Scandinavia come together… get it?)

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, David Fincher, Steven Zaillian, Stieg Larsson, Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara, Christopher Plummer, Stellan Skarsgard, Steven Berkoff, Robin Wright, Yorick Van Wageningen, Joely Richardson, Geraldine James, Goran Visnjic, Donald Sumpter, Ulf Friberg, Bengt C.W. Carlsson, Tony Way, Per Myrberg, Josefin Asplund, Eva Fritjofson, Moa Garpendal, Maya Hansson-Berggvist, Sarah Appelberg, Julian Sands, Anna Bjork, Gustaf Hammarstein, Simon Reithner, David Dencik, Marcus Johansson, Mathilda Von Essen, Mathias Palmer, Martin Jarvis, Inga Landgre, Reza Dehban, Anders Berg, Mats Andersson, Anders Jansson, Jurgen Klein, Kalle Josephson, Sandra Andreis, Arly Jover, Pierre Sjo Ostergren, Tess Panzer, Alastair Duncan, Alan Dale, Julia Rose, Peter Carlberg, Jan Abramson, Lena Stromdahl, Matthew Wolf, Anne-Li Norberg, Leo Bill, Albrecht Marco, Martina Lotun, Anna Carlson, Yvonne Astrand, Fredrik Dolk, Christian Heller, Werner Biermeier, Christine Adams, Peter Hottinger, Joyce Giraud, Bengt Wallgren, Elodie Yung, Anna Charlotta Gunnarson, Andreas Bjorklund, Embeth Davidtz, Joel Kinnaman, Karen E. Wright, Leah Harshaw, George Gerdes, Cean Chaffin, Anni Faurbye Fernandez, Malte Forssell, Ryan Kavanaugh, Berna Levin, Scott Rudin, Soren Staermose, Ole Sondberg, Mikael Wallen, Steven Zaillian, Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross, Jeff Cronenweth, Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall, Laray Mayfield, Donald Graham Burt, Frida Arvidsson, K.C. Fox, Lara Baldwin, Christos Dervenis, Eirik Ohna, Daniel Stillman, Florian Engelhardt, Allen Kupetsky, Bob Wagner, Pete Waterman, Maileen Williams, Holiday Landa, Thom Brennan, Alyson Dee Moore, Richard Quinn, JOhn Roesch, Toddy Bryant, Jeff Chumas, Ben Cooke, Jacob Dewitt, Per Dunder, Patty Majorczak-Connolly, Mark Sussman, Jola Wieczorek, Paul Alderman, Tyler Nelson, Alex Olivares, Kimberly Aguirre, Garrett Basch, Ulf Bjorlin, Bettina Browne, Veronika Eriksson, Desirae Ferrer, Astrid Hammarsten, Elinor Isenberg, Caroline Johansson, Suzanne Lehfeldt, Gareth Lewis, Larry Madrid, Andrea McKee, Kyle McGatlin, Catherine Pittman, Susanna Same, Candice Taylor, Rasmus WassbergAround the same time is Lisbeth Salander (Rooney Mara) – an unusual but equally brilliant detective and hacker security company Milton Security – tasked in Blomkvist life to sniff around (“sniff around!”  House of Pain, people!), which ultimately leads but to the fact that they Blomkvist with the murder of Harriet Vanger help you.

They entered a 40-year-old chess game of intrigue, murder and incest.  I said it.  Intrigue.

What is good?

Rooney Mara, that is what is good.  Man, she pierced every possible skin flap that was available.  And then more flaps, which is professional.

More?

Christopher Plummer.  I almost had the belief that he was old.  Good acting!

Danny Craig (my buddy).  He has been doing sit-ups.

Soundtrack – Trent Reznor made my booty shake.  “Hammer of the Gods” is right!  And then…

SPOILER ALERT!!!

And then it happened.  I was made to cry.

I can, with squirming, handle anal rape.

Bloody nine iron to face is nothing (even with broken teeth clattering on the tile).

Torture-murder-dismembering of young women is easy.

But do not fuck with the cat.

NEVER fuck with the cat.

My eyes leaked.  I sniffled.  I took another bong hit and one more shot of Kossu.  My eyes leaked some more.

Finally, I became less a Swede and more a man (kidding, Malin – Swedes are now cool to me).

SPOILER ALERT OVER!

For a summation, three thumbs up!  One thumb just for Rooney Mara.  One thumb for David Fincher.  And another thumb for the year 2009 version from the Swedes – at least if shit is for the messing they don’t make it a greater (or lesser) mess, right?

And one head lowered, mourning for little furry cats everywhere.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen – (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

P.S.  How could Ozzy not win “Survivor”?  Odin, have you forsaken us all?