Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Green Lantern, Martin Campbell, Greg Berlanti, Michael Green, Marc Guggenheim, Michael Goldenberg, Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Temuera Morrison, Jenna Craig, Jon Tenney, Mike Doyle, Gattlin Griffith, Nick Jandl, Dylan James, Leanne Cochran, Deke Anderson, Alexander Asefa, Michael AvMen, Angela Bassett, Clancy Brown, Mindy Caraccioli, Amy Carlson, Laura Cayouette, Joseph Cintron, Michael Clark Duncan, Griff Furst, Nick Gomez, Garrett Hines, Nick Jones Jr., Evan Kelly, Sharon Morris, Paul Parducci, Ric Reitz, Tim Robbins, Bill Ross, Geoffrey Rush, Jay O. Sanders, Taika Waititi, Jeff Wolfe, Andy Abele, D'Arcy Allen, Annette Denise Bass, Jennifer Benton, Brooke Bezick, Erin Booth, Blake Nelson Boyd, Kylie Creppel, Carlo Daquin, Jenifer Rebecca Foster, Gino Galento, Jewel Grosch, Emily D. Haley, Anderw Kantowski, Dorian Kingi, John C. Klein, Holly Ladnier, Elton LeBlanc, Armando Leduc, Flavia Manes Rossi, Kiki Mannear, Tiffany Morgan, Wayne Douglas Morgan, Lance E. Nichols, Roger Eduardo Palomino, Maria Ruiz, Rhonda Schaubert, Suzanne Severio, Tony Severio, Andre De'Sean Shanks, Chaz Smith, Logan Douglas Smith, Terry Lee Smith, AnneMarie Spizuocco, Lauren Sullivan, James Lesley Taylor, Elizabeth Tranchant, David Lee Valle, Ricky Vo, Chris Whetstone, John T. Wilson, Donald De Line, Herb Gains, Andrew Haas, Geoff Johns, James Newton Howard, Dion Beebe, Stuart Baird, Pam Dixon, Grant Major, Daniel Carbo, Bill Daly, Nadia Brand, Mikey Eberle, Lisa Dilenschneider, Justin M. Hamilton, Ben Silverman, Ozzy Inguanzo

Green Lantern [REVIEW]

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Green Lantern, Martin Campbell, Greg Berlanti, Michael Green, Marc Guggenheim, Michael Goldenberg, Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Temuera Morrison, Jenna Craig, Jon Tenney, Mike Doyle, Gattlin Griffith, Nick Jandl, Dylan James, Leanne Cochran, Deke Anderson, Alexander Asefa, Michael AvMen, Angela Bassett, Clancy Brown, Mindy Caraccioli, Amy Carlson, Laura Cayouette, Joseph Cintron, Michael Clark Duncan, Griff Furst, Nick Gomez, Garrett Hines, Nick Jones Jr., Evan Kelly, Sharon Morris, Paul Parducci, Ric Reitz, Tim Robbins, Bill Ross, Geoffrey Rush, Jay O. Sanders, Taika Waititi, Jeff Wolfe, Andy Abele, D'Arcy Allen, Annette Denise Bass, Jennifer Benton, Brooke Bezick, Erin Booth, Blake Nelson Boyd, Kylie Creppel, Carlo Daquin, Jenifer Rebecca Foster, Gino Galento, Jewel Grosch, Emily D. Haley, Anderw Kantowski, Dorian Kingi, John C. Klein, Holly Ladnier, Elton LeBlanc, Armando Leduc, Flavia Manes Rossi, Kiki Mannear, Tiffany Morgan, Wayne Douglas Morgan, Lance E. Nichols, Roger Eduardo Palomino, Maria Ruiz, Rhonda Schaubert, Suzanne Severio, Tony Severio, Andre De'Sean Shanks, Chaz Smith, Logan Douglas Smith, Terry Lee Smith, AnneMarie Spizuocco, Lauren Sullivan, James Lesley Taylor, Elizabeth Tranchant, David Lee Valle, Ricky Vo, Chris Whetstone, John T. Wilson, Donald De Line, Herb Gains, Andrew Haas, Geoff Johns, James Newton Howard, Dion Beebe, Stuart Baird, Pam Dixon, Grant Major, Daniel Carbo, Bill Daly, Nadia Brand, Mikey Eberle, Lisa Dilenschneider, Justin M. Hamilton, Ben Silverman, Ozzy InguanzoThe Green Lantern

With Wit, Reviewed By Kimmo Mustonenen

Ryan Reynolds is the man.  But no longer today.

This Northman famous film star – once with Scarlett Johansson (followed drunkenly by leathery Sean Penn, yowza!) – is now expected to hold a straight face above with propping a spirit-sucking expensive superhero film.

The great collapse of Green Lantern will cause most to jump on Reynolds to be blamed… but the wrong-headed doing has its origin in a lamest of the television set-trained scriptwriters and mega stone cold producer honchos.

Yes, that is what I said.

A consequence is that the new Warner Brothers flick with the load of explaining (who the Green Lantern is, for instance) is out there for all to see at megaplexes until the next super hero comes to call and kicks Green Lantern to piracy bin.

What?

In one overcalculated effort to cover all surfaces into a whole film tonally – which doesn’t work and is all over the place.  Confusion is not for summer cinema!

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Green Lantern, Martin Campbell, Greg Berlanti, Michael Green, Marc Guggenheim, Michael Goldenberg, Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Temuera Morrison, Jenna Craig, Jon Tenney, Mike Doyle, Gattlin Griffith, Nick Jandl, Dylan James, Leanne Cochran, Deke Anderson, Alexander Asefa, Michael AvMen, Angela Bassett, Clancy Brown, Mindy Caraccioli, Amy Carlson, Laura Cayouette, Joseph Cintron, Michael Clark Duncan, Griff Furst, Nick Gomez, Garrett Hines, Nick Jones Jr., Evan Kelly, Sharon Morris, Paul Parducci, Ric Reitz, Tim Robbins, Bill Ross, Geoffrey Rush, Jay O. Sanders, Taika Waititi, Jeff Wolfe, Andy Abele, D'Arcy Allen, Annette Denise Bass, Jennifer Benton, Brooke Bezick, Erin Booth, Blake Nelson Boyd, Kylie Creppel, Carlo Daquin, Jenifer Rebecca Foster, Gino Galento, Jewel Grosch, Emily D. Haley, Anderw Kantowski, Dorian Kingi, John C. Klein, Holly Ladnier, Elton LeBlanc, Armando Leduc, Flavia Manes Rossi, Kiki Mannear, Tiffany Morgan, Wayne Douglas Morgan, Lance E. Nichols, Roger Eduardo Palomino, Maria Ruiz, Rhonda Schaubert, Suzanne Severio, Tony Severio, Andre De'Sean Shanks, Chaz Smith, Logan Douglas Smith, Terry Lee Smith, AnneMarie Spizuocco, Lauren Sullivan, James Lesley Taylor, Elizabeth Tranchant, David Lee Valle, Ricky Vo, Chris Whetstone, John T. Wilson, Donald De Line, Herb Gains, Andrew Haas, Geoff Johns, James Newton Howard, Dion Beebe, Stuart Baird, Pam Dixon, Grant Major, Daniel Carbo, Bill Daly, Nadia Brand, Mikey Eberle, Lisa Dilenschneider, Justin M. Hamilton, Ben Silverman, Ozzy InguanzoGreatly and with greatly bombast, he seizes points of Star Wars, Top Gun and from the Superman, in a kind of superhero stew (only less meat – we need meat!).

Four authors convert the film script (each working from separate story) which spreads nerd-speak like written for baby, followed from the cosmic heavenly drilling carriage credited (you know, not understandable).

Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) is a ass-kicker pilot, who sets egos over brothers.

One day, after an expensive combat aircraft during a war game is inadvertently destroyed, this creates an improbable discovery for Hal: a dying magenta-red foreigner (Temeura Morrison) gives Hal a green lantern fulfilled with cosmic energies and his connected ring.

He puts on the ring and promising allegiance to the lantern, Hal transports to another world (not ours!), in which he experiences stuff that makes him now a member of the Green Lantern Corps: a volume of green intergalactic warriors, who use the energy of the power to fight against the forces of the evil and of fear.

Additionally, to receiving a fast course up to learning, and dress down receiving from Sinestro (Mark Strong), experiences the leader of the Green Lanterns, Hal is educated that an old enemy was freed – the Parallax – from his prison and by the galaxy and goes wild (naturally) to earth with all get out.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kimmo Mustonenen, Kimmo On Kino, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Green Lantern, Martin Campbell, Greg Berlanti, Michael Green, Marc Guggenheim, Michael Goldenberg, Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Temuera Morrison, Jenna Craig, Jon Tenney, Mike Doyle, Gattlin Griffith, Nick Jandl, Dylan James, Leanne Cochran, Deke Anderson, Alexander Asefa, Michael AvMen, Angela Bassett, Clancy Brown, Mindy Caraccioli, Amy Carlson, Laura Cayouette, Joseph Cintron, Michael Clark Duncan, Griff Furst, Nick Gomez, Garrett Hines, Nick Jones Jr., Evan Kelly, Sharon Morris, Paul Parducci, Ric Reitz, Tim Robbins, Bill Ross, Geoffrey Rush, Jay O. Sanders, Taika Waititi, Jeff Wolfe, Andy Abele, D'Arcy Allen, Annette Denise Bass, Jennifer Benton, Brooke Bezick, Erin Booth, Blake Nelson Boyd, Kylie Creppel, Carlo Daquin, Jenifer Rebecca Foster, Gino Galento, Jewel Grosch, Emily D. Haley, Anderw Kantowski, Dorian Kingi, John C. Klein, Holly Ladnier, Elton LeBlanc, Armando Leduc, Flavia Manes Rossi, Kiki Mannear, Tiffany Morgan, Wayne Douglas Morgan, Lance E. Nichols, Roger Eduardo Palomino, Maria Ruiz, Rhonda Schaubert, Suzanne Severio, Tony Severio, Andre De'Sean Shanks, Chaz Smith, Logan Douglas Smith, Terry Lee Smith, AnneMarie Spizuocco, Lauren Sullivan, James Lesley Taylor, Elizabeth Tranchant, David Lee Valle, Ricky Vo, Chris Whetstone, John T. Wilson, Donald De Line, Herb Gains, Andrew Haas, Geoff Johns, James Newton Howard, Dion Beebe, Stuart Baird, Pam Dixon, Grant Major, Daniel Carbo, Bill Daly, Nadia Brand, Mikey Eberle, Lisa Dilenschneider, Justin M. Hamilton, Ben Silverman, Ozzy InguanzoCarrying a unruffled new costume, Hal drives back to his main planet, around the Parallax’s minion to confront Dr. Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard).

He must also examine his own worth to ex-girlfriend, Carol Ferris (Blake Lively – who isn’t Ginnifer Goodwin – summer movies are suckage) and defeat that ne’er-do-well.

Warner Brothers would like that we enjoy all the big tent pole things with our wallets – Green Lantern for sure.

Sadly, but this is more like which one expects from a independent superhero film (of which is nothing, right?).  Non-geeks will not enjoy the production because of non-exciting production.  It’s passable, but not much more than an two-hour digression.

Green Lantern is generic – it has an imitative approach that arranges this motion picture film to fall into whichever hell circle Dante envisioned for.

No fear to say it here!

As a man, I only can dream the upcoming Captain Stoppo movie from MC Comics is less a waste of my and yours time. 

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Behind The Proscenium, Kyrle Lendhoffer, Reese Witherspoon, Water For Elephants, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Paul Schneider, Jim Norton, Hal Holbrook, Mark Povinelli, Richard Brake, Stephen Monroe Taylor, Ken Foree, Scott MacDonald, James Frain, Sam Anderson, John Aylward, Brad Greenquist, Tim Guinee, Donna W. Scott, E.E. Bell, Kyle Jordan, Aleksandra Kaniak, Ilia Volok, Bruce Gray, Jim Jansen, James Keane, Ivo Nandi, Karynn Moore, Andrew Connolly, Doug McDougal, Tracy Phillips Rowan O'Hara, Water for Elephants, Tai, Uggie, Ice, Sita Acevedo, Danny Castle, Michael Coronas, Aloysia Gavre, Francis Lawrence, Andrew R. Tennenbaum, Erwin Stoff, Gil Netter, Kevin Halloran, Alan Edward Bell, Ana Maria Quintana, Chad Holmes, David Crank, Denise Chamian, Molly Allen, Sasha Veneziano, Kimmo MustonenenKimmo Mustonenen (Kimmo On Kino) – Behind The Proscenium

18 comments

  1. Fred Thomas Fred · June 17, 2011

    Great review, Kimmo. Did you mean ‘soul-sucking’ in a good way?

  2. Don in San Diego · June 17, 2011

    The Green Lantern saves the world and you just sit there eating your haggis and complaining all that shit. What planet have you ever saved asshole?

    • Dave in San Diego · June 17, 2011

      Hopefully He’s saving people from seeing that god awful movie.

      Green Lantern is a Homo.

      • Jim in NJ · June 17, 2011

        So is Dave in San Diego’s father. Have fun buying him his lube Dave.

  3. craig hill · June 17, 2011

    This reviewer is terrible. If you’re gonna try to reach English-only readers, find a better translator! This guy clearly had no grasp of the main character or the plot, which was not really hard to follow, but hard to follow for him it was, nevertheless. And then he complains that it’s low-brow and trite. He comes off like a guy who just wants to be provactive, and say every contradictory thing that comes to mind, and expect his readers to be as dumb as him, and like what they read. Yeccchhhhh! What a complete waste of a perfectly good minute of my life, now forever ruined.

    • Dave in San Diego · June 17, 2011

      I find it funny that you complain about wasting a minute here, but not the 2 hours watching that crappy movie. Oh look Hal knows the bald guy all the sudden, oh look the bald guys dad is a senator that looks younger than him. I can stand this guys broken English….but not a movie that looks to be put together from three different scripts.

    • Kimmo Mustonenen · June 17, 2011

      I was told provacative to be a good thing. Especially when reviewing a movie that does not have too many important points.

      • Jim in NJ · June 17, 2011

        Learn English before you try to write it. It will make you not sound like a fucking idiot in the future.

    • The fuckerator · June 17, 2011

      Hey. Google translation is considered a viable expert on movies. It doesn’t get better than this. If I want a comprehensible review I’ll go read the New York Times.

      😉

  4. HA HA · June 17, 2011

    It’s not the flop everyone was hoping. $24 million on Friday – $60+ million weekend.

  5. Mikey C. · June 17, 2011

    Hello—I is Kimmo Mustonenen! I does not like new Green Lantern summer popcorn moviefilm! Is not NIIIICCCE!!! It make no comparison with glorious moviefilms made in mine homecountryland of Kazakhstan!

  6. sebastian · June 17, 2011

    Your movie reviews are starting to make sense to me…I think I’m learning a new language…or something! Keep good work up!!

  7. The Pontificator · June 17, 2011

    There is a fine line between a good movie and a great one – and this film flirted with that line but didn’t quite cross it. It couldn’t decide if it wanted to be story driven or a summer blockbuster. And while trying to be a blend of both, became neither and left me feeling like there should have been more. It was a good time that had all the potential to be a great time…

    See my full review…http://theboxedoffice.blogspot.com/

  8. Kekemies · June 17, 2011

    Wow. That’s some bad English.

  9. Pingback: The Third Dilemma (or 3D-ilemma) » OnMedea
  10. Fuck this · June 17, 2011

    Oh, I don’t know. What do you think? 70% dropoff this weekend?

  11. Sp@ceMunk3y · June 17, 2011

    Kimmo is an excellent critic. His reviews are spot on. He is the only critic I read.