The Terrorist Games of the 22nd Olympiad

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Those Damn Kids, Lester Aldrich, Sochi Olympic Games, Matt Lauer, Vladimir Putin, Pootie Poot, Savannah Guthrie

You know we’re living in a crazy fucked up world when a victory for Russia is that no one gets killed during the Sochi Olympic games.

If terrorists do not strike, I can imagine Vladimir Putin shouting from the Caucasus Mountains: “See, I told you! Now please you to come to Russia for visit. We are safe!”

Yeah, fat chance, Pootie Poot.

The fact is, most people in the world will be very surprised if there isn’t at least one act of violence or terrorism during the games.

I personally believe there will be several acts of violence and probably a couple of countries will leave early because of it.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Those Damn Kids, Lester Aldrich, Sochi Olympic Games, Matt Lauer, Vladimir Putin, Pootie Poot, Savannah GuthrieWhat’s the point of going there then?

I understand it for the athletes, they been training their entire young lives and this might be their only shot. If you’re a cross-country skier, you roll the dice at that point.

But why do we have to send Matt Lauer and Savannah Guthrie into the shit?

How many morning show hosts are we willing to sacrifice for sport? 15? 20?

Shame on you, NBC.

Send that guy that’s always in the flak jacket in Egypt. He can probably tell you what’s happening in the luge.

There’s no upside for Russia as host of these games. Why would anyone visit a place that needs 40,000 troops to protect you?

A million troops could probably protect South Sudan but you see them trying to host the Academy Awards or even a bowling tournament.

Manka Bros., Khan Manka, Those Damn Kids, Lester Aldrich, Sochi Olympic Games, Matt Lauer, Vladimir Putin, Pootie Poot, Savannah Guthrie, Polish ice dancersIt’s such a joke.

Those Olympics venues will look like Sarajaveo’s in a couple of years with grass growing through what used to be a Curling arena or whatever.

I hear they have 40,000 troops guarding the Games.

That has to make one feel secure – 40,000 drunken Russian troops lusting after Polish ice dancers.

The goddamned Polish ice dancers never had a chance.

Oh, well, I’ll be watching.

I love the Olympics.

I’ll talk at you later…

AARP, Alf Landon, Arbys, Ari Emanuel, Ben Silverman, cannibalism, CNN, east lansing, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, korean war, lester aldrich, manka bros., Michigan, octogenarian, those damn kids, World's largest Media Company, Paul Harvey, Art LInklletter, Lawrence Welk, Garrison Keillor, Andy Rooney, Douglas MacarthurLester Aldrich – Those Damn Kids

P.S. – No report on Those Damn Kids this week – it’s too goddamned cold for even those little pissants to come out from their holes.

 

Christie and McDonnell Nailed All The Seven Deadly Sins

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. Lee

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeThis has been a terrible year for two popular Republican Governors… Chris Christie and Bob McDonnell.

Both of their political lives are basically over… “allegedly” (I was told to say by the Manka Bros. lawyers).

There were actually certain people who thought one or both of them could have one day been President!

HA!

At this point, they have a better chance to earn $1 billion from Warren Buffet for picking a perfect NCAA Men’s Basketball Bracket (which is a 1 in a 3.8 trillion chance).

So, let’s run down the 7 DEADLY SINS and see how the great men from Virginia and New Jersey fared:

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeChris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #1 – LUST:

This is probably the one that no one in America cares about (at least not from these guys). They both obviously had a lust for power but most think of this one in a sexual context – so let’s just assume they had it and let’s try not to think about it any more.

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #2 – GLUTTONY:

I’m looking at Governor Christie mainly on this one (butter ain’t butter unless it’s deep fried!). Governor McDonnell obviously has a gluttony for wedding dinners but Governor Christie had a gluttony for everyone else’s dinner.

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #3 – GREED:

Governor McDonnell (and wife) – any questions? And Governor Christie’s greed for political endorsements was his undoing – though it’s hard to understand why anyone would be that stupid. As a comparison, Governor Christie easily wins the battle of Greed – like a foot race between Usain Bolt and Betty White.

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeChris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #4 – SLOTH:

Governor Christie – any questions? In general both men are guilty because they had no desire to cover their tracks. So lazy. Corruption in the digital age has never seen such sloth. How hard is it to hide the bullshit you are attempting to do?

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #5 – WRATH:

The wrath by Governor Christie on those who wouldn’t endorse him is (allegedly – HA!) certainly wrath – right, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken and Mayor of Ft. Lee?

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeChris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #6 – ENVY:

Both Governors really envy Air Force 1 and would have loved to have been in control of that son of a bitch. Alas, ain’t gonna happen.

Mrs. McDonnell, you really couldn’t wait to demand a Rolex with an inscription? In the words of the whore Julia Roberts from “Pretty Woman” ‘BIG MISTAKE!’

Chris Christie, Lester Aldrich, Those Damn Kids, Bob McDonnell, 7 deadly sins, Warren Buffet, Carl Lewis, Mayor of Hoboken, Mayer of Ft. LeeSIN #7 – PRIDE:

Governor Christie had to boast about being the guy who put the cones down during #Bridgegate. If only that’s all you did. If you kept the bridge open, you may have been President of the United States. And if Bob McDonnell would have…

Nah – Bob McDonnell wouldn’t have been gum sweeper at a Presidential theme park no matter what he did – so I suppose he should have tried to get all the shit he could. He and his wife were just really sloppy.

The real tragedy is Chris Christie – his dreams are dead.

AARP, Alf Landon, Arbys, Ari Emanuel, Ben Silverman, cannibalism, CNN, east lansing, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, korean war, lester aldrich, manka bros., Michigan, octogenarian, those damn kids, World's largest Media Company, Paul Harvey, Art LInklletter, Lawrence Welk, Garrison Keillor, Andy Rooney, Douglas MacarthurLester Aldrich – Those Damn Kids

 

Chris Christie Needs To Give Up

Chris Christie, Those Damn Kids, Lester Aldrich, BridgegateIf I ever saw man who was never going to be President of the United States it is Chris Christie.

He just has no chance and should not take one more dollar from a person who wants to donate to his Presidential campaign.

If he had any dignity, he would realize that it’s all over, apologize and figure out what he’s going to do for the rest of his life.

Because he’s not going to be President – and will most likely not hold any elected office ever again.

That’s just the truth.

He reminds me of Those Damn Kids on my block who think they just do whatever they want – walk on my lawn, put burning bags of shit on my porch, toilet paper in my trees – and expect to get away with it.

He has about as much control over his staff as he does with his weight – zero.

Which is also the percentage chance he has to be President.

I’ll talk at you next week…

AARP, Alf Landon, Arbys, Ari Emanuel, Ben Silverman, cannibalism, CNN, east lansing, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, korean war, lester aldrich, manka bros., Michigan, octogenarian, those damn kids, World's largest Media Company, Paul Harvey, Art LInklletter, Lawrence Welk, Garrison Keillor, Andy Rooney, Douglas MacarthurLester Aldrich – Those Damn Kids