Good evening from Davos!
The subject of my speech will be the importance of media in the global economy and how Hollywood will defeat Silicon Valley after their recent challenge to bring us down.
Listen, geeks, just because you talk like the characters on “Big Bang Theory” doesn’t mean you can write their dialogue. There are people who are professional comedy writers and there are people who are computer engineers. Rarely do the two sides of the brain come together allowing you to do both well.
But I’ll get into that tomorrow.
Today, I am here to say The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences can go fuck itself.
Who in the fuck do you have to give a bottle of Slivovitz to in order to get a goddamned Oscar nomination! (Or if you’re in the Hollywood Foreign Press – who can also fuck off – who do you have to give a carton of Camel Turkish Gold cigarettes.)
Now, I’m a little drunk (at my normal barstool in Davos at the Hotel Eden), and tomorrow I may deny ever writing this, but today, I am fucking pissed off!
Adding insult to injury is the fact that Steven Spielberg got a nomination for “War Horse” – are you fucking kidding me?
Spielberg hasn’t made anything decent since that Joan Crawford “Night Gallery” episode!
And “Tree Of Life”? What?! I guarantee not one of you freaks in the Academy understood at all what was happening in that movie. Sean Penn said he didn’t understand it – AND HE WAS IN IT!
Well, don’t worry about nominating us next year – I am done with you. You’re a bunch of freakin’ dinosaurs who decide nominations over martinis and cheese toast at The Smoke House.
Your loss, losers.