Friday Nights Are Hell Around Here…

Friday nights are Hell around here and God knows I’ve never been too high on abortions – but if it meant I would get one peaceful Friday night, I would have aborted every one of THOSE DAMN KIDS in the third trimester with the head sticking out!

Me and Mrs. Aldrich get back from Denny’s about 5:45 every Friday night.  I like to have me a LaBatt’s or three to sort of wind down from the week.

East Lansing, flaming manure, football game, Friday night lights, Khan Manka, Labatts, Lester Aldrich, Manka Bros., Michigan, Mrs. Aldrich, Octogenarian, old man blog, Sam Singh, Spartans, Theodore Staton, Those Damn Kids, toilet paper trees, TP in trees, World's Largest Media CompanyThen the sun goes down and it all starts.

First comes the blaring of car horns and the high-pitch screaming as they pass by.  Do these stupid kids want the whole neighborhood to think they’re idiots?  Dick suckers so high on pot they can’t even drive straight!

About an hour later, when they think I’m asleep, comes the TP.

If those little squirts knew how scarce that stuff was during the war and what we had to use to wipe our butts, they’d think twice about throwing roll after roll all over my 100-year-old elm tree.

East Lansing, flaming manure, football game, Friday night lights, Khan Manka, Labatts, Lester Aldrich, Manka Bros., Michigan, Mrs. Aldrich, Octogenarian, old man blog, Sam Singh, Spartans, Theodore Staton, Those Damn Kids, toilet paper trees, TP in trees, World's Largest Media CompanyThen it’s shaving cream and flaming manure time.

Like clockwork, those sissymarys write unmentionable sayings all over my driveway and lawn then set a bag of shit on fire.

The retards then ring the bell to let me know what they’ve done.

I GODDAMNED KNOW WHAT YOU’VE DONE!  YOU’VE RUINED MY GODDAMNED LAWN IS WHAT YOU’VE DONE!

I swear to Jesus Christ, last Friday, if I could have unlocked the bullets in time, there’d be three less of THOSE GODDAMNED KIDS in the world.

And every Saturday it takes Mrs. Aldrich half the day just clean all that crap up.

I’ll talk at you next week..

AARP, Alf Landon, Arbys, Ari Emanuel, Ben Silverman, cannibalism, CNN, east lansing, Jeff Weiner, Jeff Zucker, korean war, lester aldrich, manka bros., Michigan, octogenarian, those damn kids, World's largest Media Company, Paul Harvey, Art LInklletter, Lawrence Welk, Garrison Keillor, Andy Rooney, Douglas MacarthurLester Aldrich – Those Damn Kids

6 thoughts on “Friday Nights Are Hell Around Here…”

  1. Careful there, cowboy. Go easy on them tonight. It’s football season – lots of those damn kids running around. Stay in the basement.

    1. “According to Japanese maps officially published before 1895, the Diaoyu Islands were never drafted into Japan map” Ju Deyuan said.

      “And changes on lots of Japanese maps tell the real ownership of the Diaoyu Islands.”

      In 1945, the Japanese Government accepted the Potsdam Declaration, which stipulated that Japan must return all territories it seized from China. From then on, the Diaoyu Islands were deleted from Japanese maps.

      “Such changes actually mean Japan has returned the Diaoyu Islands to China” Ju Deyuan said.

      “However, in 1971, the Japanese Government announced that the Diaoyu Islands belong to Japan, which showed that Japan is in conflict with its commitment to the Potsdam Declaration.”

  2. Wow! That is unbelievable! Never seen a pile of burning Poo Before. Funny Post
    But probably not for you. Why did they pick your house??? You need an attack Dog.
    Cheers

    Linda
    Comic who sells Commercials

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