And while I’m at it – the Hollywood Foreign Press can suck it, too!
So, this morning I returned to the studio from a month long vacation at my house in the Seychelles – feeling relaxed, very tan and ready to make 2012 the biggest and most profitable year in Manka Bros. history.
I even had a smile on my face.
One of my assistants (Vicky, I think??? – the one with the thing on her face), even told me that I looked happy for the first time ever. And then she told me that the Producer’s Guild nominations were out – and a copy was on my desk.
I sat down at my desk. A very nice bowl of high-fiber fruit was waiting for me (because I ate way too much extra sharp cheddar cheese over the holidays). I made a quick check of the list.
Hmmm… no Manka Bros. titles.
I looked a little closer. Nope.
(And I sent cartons of Camel Turkish Blend cigarettes to the Hollywood Foreign Press which didn’t result in any nominations either.)
There must be some mistake.
Perhaps we were so loaded down with Television nominations the Producers Guild felt it would have been too much to give us a Theatrical nomination.
Hmmmm…. no TV nominations either.
I mean, what in the fucking goddamned shit is going on?!!
Adding insult to injury is the fact that Steven Spielberg got TWO NOMINATIONS! TWO! For “War Horse” and “Tintin” – are you fucking kidding me?
Spielberg hasn’t made anything decent since that Joan Crawford “Night Gallery” episode!
Your loss, losers.
P.S. – Please return my very expensive wine. There are many others more deserving of my bribes.